One evening last week, my wife and I were getting into
bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up,
and she eventually says: "I
don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me."
I said: "WHAT????!!! What was that?!"
So she says the
words that every husband on the planet dreads to hear ..."You're just not in touch with my emotional
needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man."
She responded to my puzzled
look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"
Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.
The very next day, I opted to
take the day off of work to spend time with her.
We went out to a nice
lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her
while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take,
so I told her we'll just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I
said lets get a pair for each outfit. We went on to the jewelry department, where she picked out a
pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you ... she was so excited. She must have thought I was one
wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis
bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said,
"That's
fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement.
Smiling with excited anticipatio! n she finally said, "I think this is all dear, let's go to the
cashier."
I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it."
Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled WHAT???!!!"
I then said, "Really honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for awhile. You're just not in
touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman."
And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me I added, "Why can't you just love me
for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"
Apparently I'm not having sex tonight
either
Eep Opp Ork Aah Aah...
"I have a hammer! I can put things together! I can knock things apart! I can alter my environment at will and make an incredible din all the while! Ah, it's great to be male!"
--Calvin & Hobbes
That's hilarious!! Gotta love
finding out about all those "emotional needs", such as shoes, as well as finding out that a man's need for sex
is just physical!
DrSmellThis (creator of P H E R O S)
LOL thats great!
-D
Modifying and Tweaking is a journey,
Not a destination..........................
THE BIG QUESTION did this
really happen or you just made it up? lol man i hate to be you no sex for 2 days straight ( or was it more? LOL )
turning it around on her,
that's great! funny stuff!
Sorry guys.... it was just
an email that I got. I liked the message that it sent and thought it was funny, so I posted it.
I love the
irony of it all!!
Eep Opp Ork Aah Aah...
Yes, that was
great...*dies*
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