Ever wondered what happens when

Hallmark[COLOR=bl

ack] writers are having a bad

day........
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[B

]M[/B][COLOR=black

]y tire was thumping.

I thought it was flat

When I looked at the tire...

I noticed

your cat.

Sorry!

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H[COLOR=black

]eard your wife left you,

How upset you must be .

But don't fret about it...

She

moved in with me.

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[B

]L
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]ooking back over the years

that we've been together,

I can't help but wonder...



"What the hell was I thinking?"

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[CE

NTER]C[COLOR=blac

k]ongratulations on your wedding day!

Too bad no one likes your husband.

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[B

]H[/B][COLOR=black

]ow could two people as beautiful as you

Have such an ugly baby?

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I[COLOR=black

]'ve always wanted to have

someone to hold,

someone to love.

After having met you ..



I've changed my mind.


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[B

]I
[COLOR=blac

k] must admit, you brought Religion into my life.

I never believed in Hell until I met you.

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[B

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]s the days go by, I think of how lucky I am...

That you're not here to ruin it for me.

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[B

]C[/B][COLOR=black

]ongratulations on your promotion.

Before you go...

Would you like to take this knife out

of my back?

You'll probably need it again.

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[B

]H[/B][COLOR=blac

k]appy Birthday, Uncle Dad!

(Available only in Tennessee, Kentucky & West Virginia)

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<

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H[COLOR=black

]appy birthday! You look great for your age.

Almost Lifelike!


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[B

]W
[COLOR=blac

k]hen we were together,

you always said you'd die for me.

Now that we've broken up,



I think it's time you kept your

promise.
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[B

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k]e have been friends for a very long time ..

let's say we stop?

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I[COLOR=blac

k]'m so miserable without you

it's almost like you're here.


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[I

]
<

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C[COLOR=blac

k]ongratulations on your new bundle of joy.

Did you ever find out who the father was?

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lack]

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[B

]Y
[COLOR=blac

k]our friends and I wanted to do

something special for your birthday.

So we're having you

put to sleep.

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)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) )))))))))))

)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))


S[COLOR=blac

k]o your daughter's a hooker,
and it spoiled your day.

Look at the bright side,

it's

really good

pay
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