[img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img] [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]
[img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img] [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/cool.gif[/img]
Sorry guys, I
just had to post this. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tongue.gif[/img] It really makes you wonder about the
people who write these product instructions.
In case you needed further proof that the human race
is doomed
through stupidity, here are some actual
label instructions on consumer goods.
On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use
while sleeping.
(Damn, and that\'s the only time I have to work on my
hair).
On a bag of Fritos: You could be
a winner! No purchase
necessary. Details inside.
(the shoplifter special)?
On a bar of Dial soap:
\"Directions: Use like regular
soap.\"
(and that would be how???....)
On some Swanson frozen dinners:
\"Serving suggestion:
Defrost.\"
(but, it\'s \"just\" a suggestion).
On Tesco\'s Tiramisu dessert
(printed on bottom): \"Do
not turn upside down.\"
(well...duh, a bit late, huh)!
On Marks & Spencer Bread
Pudding: \"Product will be hot
after heating.\"
(...and you thought????...)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
\"Do not iron clothes
on body.\"
(but wouldn\'t this save me more time)?
On Boot\'s Children Cough
Medicine: \"Do not drive a car
or operate machinery after taking this medication.\"
(We could do a lot to reduce
the rate of construction
accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with
head-colds off those
forklifts.)
On Nytol Sleep Aid: \"Warning: May cause drowsiness.\"
(and...I\'m taking this
because???....)
On most brands of Christmas lights: \"For indoor or
outdoor use only.\"
(as opposed
to...what)?
On a Japanese food processor: \"Not to be used for the
other use.\"
(now, somebody out there,
help me on this. I\'m a bit
curious.)
On Sainsbury\'s peanuts: \"Warning: contains nuts.\"
(talk about a
news flash)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts: \"Instructions:
Open packet, eat nuts.\"
(Step 3: maybe,
uh...fly Delta?)
On a child\'s superman costume: \"Wearing of this
garment does not enable you to fly.\"
(I
don\'t blame the company. I blame the parents for
this one.)
And my personal favorite: On a Swedish chainsaw:
\"Do
not attempt to stop chain with your hands or
genitals.\"
(Oh my God...was there a lot of this
happening
somewhere?)
[img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img] [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]
[img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img] [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/cool.gif[/img]
[img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img] [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]
[img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]
[img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]
Awesome.
(Nice signature, too.)
Holmes
</font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
Sorry guys, I just had to post this.
[img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tongue.gif[/img] It really makes you wonder about the people who write these
product instructions.
<hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">
It makes me wonder about the people
who use the products.
</font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
</font><blockquote><font
class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
Sorry guys, I just had to post this.
[img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tongue.gif[/img] It really makes you wonder about the people who write these
product instructions.
<hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">
It makes me wonder about the people
who use the products.
<hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">
Man, don\'t insult people like that...
I swear I had a chainsaw running and the only way to stop it was to use my genitals...
Fortunately, I have balls
of steel so it was okay.
</font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
Man, don\'t insult people like that... I swear I
had a chainsaw running and the only way to stop it was to use my genitals...
Fortunately, I have balls of steel
so it was okay.
<hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\"> Pancho..after your little webpage to Kari, I would
have guessed the chainsaw already removed yours. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]
You\'re
just jealous that it was about her and not YOU. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img]
[img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tongue.gif[/img]
</font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
You\'re just jealous that it was about her and
not YOU. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img] [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tongue.gif[/img]
<hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">
Oh the jealously...I just can\'t breath.
At least I have the
memories of the time that Pancho and I ran barefoot in a field of daisy\'s as he read me Shakespeare while gazing
into my eyes. Ahhhhh what a man. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]
what a man
what
a man
what a mighty good man
</font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
</font><blockquote><font
class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
You\'re just jealous that it was about her and not YOU.
[img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img] [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tongue.gif[/img]
<hr
/></blockquote><font class=\"post\">
Oh the jealously...I just can\'t breath.
At least I have the memories
of the time that Pancho and I ran barefoot in a field of daisy\'s as he read me Shakespeare while gazing into my
eyes. Ahhhhh what a man. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]
<hr /></blockquote><font
class=\"post\">
Actually, Pancho told me he\'s planning ANOTHER web paen to all of us, in his harem. He just
has to come up with rhymes for \"Elana, SSG, sexyredhead.....\"
</font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
</font><blockquote><font
class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
</font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
You\'re
just jealous that it was about her and not YOU. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img]
[img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tongue.gif[/img]
<hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">
Oh the
jealously...I just can\'t breath.
At least I have the memories of the time that Pancho and I ran barefoot in a
field of daisy\'s as he read me Shakespeare while gazing into my eyes. Ahhhhh what a man.
[img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]
<hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">
Actually,
Pancho told me he\'s planning ANOTHER web paen to all of us, in his harem. He just has to come up with rhymes for
\"Elana, SSG, sexyredhead.....\"
<hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">
I swear the woman is
psychic...
</font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
Actually, Pancho told me he\'s planning ANOTHER
web paen to all of us, in his harem. He just has to come up with rhymes for \"Elana, SSG, sexyredhead.....\"
<hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">
OK..but I want angels sprinkling glitter (love dust) and little
white, fluffy bunnies on mine.
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