Close

Page 1 of 2 1 ... LastLast
Results 1 to 30 of 35

Thread: Fear

  1. #1
    Full Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2002
    Posts
    156
    Rep Power
    8012

    Default Fear

    visit-red-300x50PNG
    I just realised something. I need to find a way to eliminate my own fear. What keeps me from approaching 100 women every day? Fear of rejection and fear of other people reactions.

    Without fear I think that anyone could get laid with a new girl every day (if that is what you want). Imagine if you approached 1000 women every day with the intent of laying them. Even ugly people would surly get one success in 1000 attempts.

    So, from this perspective, looks does not mean much. A good looking guy could get sex faster since he may only have to approach 50 women instead of 1000, but the end result would be the same.

    Does anyone know any good techniques for removing your own fear? Because I think that that would yield much better results then any amount of pheromones.

  2. #2

  3. #3
    Moderator belgareth's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2002
    Location
    Lower Slovobia
    Posts
    7,961
    Rep Power
    8516

    Default Re: Fear

    ironration

    I have always been a bit shy. The thing that most helps me is to remember that it doesn\'t really matter. So they reject you? What does that mean? Not a thing! Just go on to the next one and forget them. A good sense of humor helps a lot too. Instead of approaching women, try just being friendly in a casual way. Saying something funny or just being nice to people always works. You don\'t have to approach them so much as be approachable and friendly. You\'ll find that many friendly conversations result in good relationships but it sometimes requires a little work and time. Who cares so long as you are working on a relationship with several women. Over time, the returns will multiply. Any approach requires practice to get good at it.

  4. #4
    Phero Enthusiast
    Join Date
    Jun 2003
    Posts
    279
    Rep Power
    7617

    Default Re: Fear

    I guess it is more about the past experiences. Imagine someone who has grown up in an environment in which girls are friendly and has less inhibitions. and imagine me, growing up in an environment where girls are protected like the whole family\'s honour. Similarly, I had an australian friend who came over to Turkey as one year exchange student.. he was very outgoing when he first came, but after 5 months he became depressed and lost all of his self confidence.. likewise, when I was in d.c. I was so confident that I could walk up to ANYONE on the street and start a pleasant conversation.

  5. #5
    Phero Enthusiast
    Join Date
    Jan 2003
    Posts
    220
    Rep Power
    7759

    Default Re: Fear

    You are right, ironration!
    It took me halv year to change myself, but right now I can approach and start to chat with a woman without been nervous. Another thing, that it will take more time to feel and know what about You will talk.

    Couple of books helped me to find pretty much selfconfidence and knowledge, here it is:

    1. \"The New Psycho-Cybernetics\" by Maxwell Maltz, 236SEK
    2. \"Bodily Communication\" by Michael Agryle (this one is too theoretical, but interesting)
    3. \"Interpersonal Communication\" by Peter Hartley (theoretical too)
    4. \"Body Language\" Teach Yourself series. by Gordon R. Wainwright. (Exercises, I will reccomend this one)
    In Swedesh:
    5. \"Introduktion till NLP\" by Joseph O\'Connor and John Seymor
    (This one is pretty good guide to Neuro-Linguistic Programming with examples and exercises. I will reccomend this one in first place)
    6. \"Kroppsspråk\" by Samy Molcho (Body Language) (Pretty funny one..)

    All of thouse You can get in Akademibokhandeln in Sweden.
    I am sure, there is some alternatives in other countries.

    /Bubu

  6. #6
    Phero Enthusiast
    Join Date
    Jan 2003
    Posts
    220
    Rep Power
    7759

    Default Re: Fear

    DrSmellThis!
    This was a good one!

  7. #7
    Stranger
    Join Date
    Jul 2003
    Posts
    17
    Rep Power
    0

    Default Re: Fear

    iron,

    First step in fighting fear off is to find out Why and What causes the fear in the first place?

    FOr most people it is the fear of embarassment of being rejected. To counter this, you have to first think if you are WORTH it. Self-Confidence.....if you are WORTH it...then go with the attitude that it is their LOSS...not yours.

    This may sound like mumbo-jumbo or cliched...but, it has worked for me. I used to be a complete shy guy....not even talk to a popular guy in our class....let alone the girls.
    Thinking this way, I have approached the hottest girls around with no fear....of course, I wasn\'t successful most of the time, but I still \"stepped up\" to the plate. (that is why I am going to try mones... [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img] )

    But, truth of the matter is.....so what is going to happen if they say NO? Big Deal....their loss.......Next.....

    Edit: One story that I use in my life and can help others is this:

    Imagine you are at the free-throw line of a basketball. You have one chance to tie the score and take the game to overtime. Two possible results...Tie game..or Lose the game.

    Now, what are you going to do? Are you going to buckle and not even take the shot? This way you gave yourself 0% chance to even making the shot. You lost.

    If you decide to take the shot and didn\'t make it...big deal..u lost..but atleast you took the shot...giving you a 50% chance to tie the game.

    I would take 50% chance over 0%....wouldn\'t you?

  8. #8
    Phero Guru Sagacious1420's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2003
    Posts
    1,537
    Rep Power
    7718

    Default Re: Fear

    Great post DST-

    Adds new meaning to the idea that women can smell fear in men that approach them, huh.

    I used to be quite shy and reserved for what seemed like forever. I have to say that the one thing that helped me most was spending a few years at a job where I had to interact w/ and entertain a couple of thousand ppl a year. I would meet some really gorgeous women (e.g., trophy wives and L.A. silicone queens) and eventually I became desensitized; they didn\'t phase me one bit and it was perfectly normal to strike up a convo w/ them. In fact innocent flirtation was all part of the act...the women loved it and their SO\'s were always really cool about...they new it was just part of the job. Now I use that same philosophy as if it were just all in a days work to interact w/ women and I\'m just entertaining them. The funny thing was that when I first started this job, I was always very nervous, but after a while I got very good at mingling. Next thing you know, I would have women pursuing me occadionally. I got treated to a lot of free dinners by women I had just met...personally, I think they just enjoyed my company in most cases...I was witty, upbeat and fun to be around. Of course, the fact that they were buzzed from wine tasting all day didn\'t hurt. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smirk.gif[/img] My coworkers were always dumbfounded by this phenomenon. It was because of this change in me that I have had so much more success w/ women, since, IMO. I dated one young lady, Bonnie, for about a year (cross between Nicole Kidman & Meg Ryan, yum!), as well as a sexy Hungarian chick, Monika, whom I dated for about 4 months...not to mention a few one nighters w/ random chicks...all because of this job. In both cases it started w/ an invitation to dinner and just progressed from there. Mostly 7-9s, with the very rare 10. Since I don\'t work in the \"candy store\" anymore, I have to go out to meet women...whether locals or tourists. It does require a lot more effort on my part these days, because in the real world here (outside of this work environment) the M:F ratio is 3:1, but now I\'m up to the task. Practice makes permanent! [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]

  9. #9
    Stranger
    Join Date
    Jul 2003
    Posts
    17
    Rep Power
    0

    Default Re: Fear

    Where do I apply for that job again???? :P

  10. #10
    Phero Enthusiast
    Join Date
    Jun 2003
    Posts
    278
    Rep Power
    7597

    Default Re: Fear

    I used to joke around with my friends, Id tell them that Id swear women could smell fear, but i didnt truly beleive it, i figured that that would mean women were psychic. its amazing what science can show us. It really does sound supernatural, that women can sense \'fear\'. its amazing how woman can subconsciously read men, and men cant even consciously read women. damn evolution, damn it straight to hell

    Makes you wonder, if there are scents for other emotions. My ex used to be able tell whenever i was pissed even when i had a poker face on. hmmmmm

  11. #11
    Phero Guru Sagacious1420's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2003
    Posts
    1,537
    Rep Power
    7718

    Default Re: Fear

    </font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
    Where do I apply for that job again???? :P

    <hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">

    Come to the Land Of Juice Joy!

    To be truthful, this particular place is not as easy to land a job as others. They have a rather unique approach to how they do things. For example, we were required to sample wines w/ guests...don\'t let anyone ever tell you that wine tasting isn\'t hard work, I do it for a living. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img]
    It\'s definitely good work, if you can get it. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smirk.gif[/img]

  12. #12
    Phero Guru Sagacious1420's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2003
    Posts
    1,537
    Rep Power
    7718

    Default Re: Fear

    </font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
    Makes you wonder, if there are scents for other emotions.

    <hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">

    Yea...or any sense to our emotions, as well! [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img]

    Olfaction is considered to be the strongest memory trigger and I suspect that this could apply to emotional triggers. Ya gotta keep in mind that the specific associations of a smell and an emoitonal state are highly individualistic. That is, two different ppl could respond to the same smell w/ very different emotional states, based on their personal experiences. Make sense? Just look at food preferences or aversions...a certain smell can trigger a very powerful emotional response.

  13. #13
    Phero Enthusiast PHP 87's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2001
    Posts
    286
    Rep Power
    8297

    Default Re: Fear

    The best way to overcome fear of approaching women is to approach women.

    There simply are no shortcuts or substitues for experience.

    I was at club last night and approached a stunning blonde with a world class rack.
    She was a total B!tch, and I crashed and burned.

    That was possibly the worse-case scenario that could have occured, and it was no big deal.
    Plus my friends were all in awe of me because I at least had the courage to approach the best looking girl in the club, and while I was sober to boot.

    In other words, it felt better to crash and burn than to be driving home and beating myself up for not approaching her.

    Next opportunity you have, go out to a club, mall or wherever, and approach as many women as possible, without putting any emphasis on the outcome.
    Just tell yourself that this is \"practice\" and the results are meaningless.

    Once you realize that it\'s no big deal, you\'ll feel more comfortable doing it and it will eventually become second nature to you.

    The more you do it, the easier it becomes.

  14. #14
    Phero Enthusiast
    Join Date
    Jun 2003
    Posts
    278
    Rep Power
    7597

    Default Re: Fear

    </font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />


    Olfaction is considered to be the strongest memory trigger


    <hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">



    Yeah, this is true. I actually dont believe that the VNO is effected by nol/none. Some researches found specific receptors in the mucus membranes of the nose for None/Nol.

    My point is that if a woman can smell these androgens then they unknowingly associate past feelings(like other smells do with other emotions) that were expirienced when exposed to these chemicals--like when they cuddled or made love to their ex boyfriend.

  15. #15
    Phero Guru Sagacious1420's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2003
    Posts
    1,537
    Rep Power
    7718

    Default Re: Fear

    </font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />

    Next opportunity you have, go out to a club, mall or wherever, and approach as many women as possible, without putting any emphasis on the outcome.
    Just tell yourself that this is \"practice\" and the results are meaningless.

    Once you realize that it\'s no big deal, you\'ll feel more comfortable doing it and it will eventually become second nature to you.

    The more you do it, the easier it becomes.

    <hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">

    Well put, my friend!

    I had a somewhat similar experience yesterday, but not at a club and much to my surprise I didn\'t actually crash and burn. But, nonetheless, it was a case where I went for it in the face of what would seemed impossible odds.

    I drove down to San Francisco for an interview, but instead of leaving right away afterward, I decided to wait...afternoon rush hour the day before the July 4th holiday weekend starts...no thanks. So I was trying to decide where to go grab a bite to eat and I heard a radio ad for a new Hooters that opened on Monday...I thought it would be an interesting experience. There were a ton of ppl (mostly guys, imagine that) waiting outside and I got the standard 15-30 min. wait, but I put my name down anyway. Five minutes later, I was sitting at the bar and this sweet Georgia peach (10 and then some) walks up and takes my drink order. She was very friendly and a little flirty at first, which seemed to be the norm for the girls. But I noticed something interesting, I was the only person that didn\'t have his/her name written on his/her bar napkin, she remembered my name right away. Of course that could have been due my opener. The first time she called me sir, I started looking around, asking if my Dad just showed up (oddly enough this one works well for me when girls have to be \"profession\"-it really relaxes them) and told her that she could call me by my first name. She kept coming back and chatting w/ me and I found out that she grew up around where I have family, she just transferred to SF about two weeks ago, doesn\'t really have any friends yet, yadayadayada. Lindsey\'s trainer, Krista, started chatting w/ me and I found out that she grew up not far from where I did, yadayadayada. And then this other girl, Andrea, had to get into the action and kept coming over...she didn\'t say much, but kept flashing me these coy looks. I was cracking on her about being so timid when opening the beer case boxes (didn\'t want to break a nail), I looked right at her nails and asked \"so are they real?\", then I looked her in the eyes and smirked. She replied w/ they\'re very expensive and returned w/ a smirk of her own. She actually blushed. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/blush.gif[/img] I thought it was unusual that these girls kept coming back to me so often to chat w/ me, since they were very busy. I was also surprised that Lindsey opened up to me so much. Now they were attentive and talked a bit to other customers, but I never saw Lindsey bend over the counter and push her boobs together, when she was talking to any of the other guys, for example. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tongue.gif[/img] She sure made it hard to maintain eye contact w/ her. I was talking to a dude next to me about how much guys must ask them for their digits and got him to unwittingly ask Lindsey if this happens. The funny thing was that when she responded w/ hardly ever, she was looking right at me and not the guy that asked the question. Well, we exchanged numbers before I left and she said she would like to travel up to see me and visit the area. She loves wine, it seems.


    The gal sitting on the other side of me, Nancy, chatted my ear off the whole time and invited me to join her and some friends at a keraoke bar. She gave me her cell number, just in case. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img] The funny thing was that I was driving us to the bar, so I don\'t know what the just in case was. Especially since she was hinting at wanting to set me up w/ a gf of hers. Well, later Nancy\'s bf (no mention of him, at all)showed up and I was really wondering what the just in case was for at that point. Brian and I actually got along really well...he invited me out for a \"smoke\" on the sidewalk...gotta love SF. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/cool.gif[/img] There was this girl, Kat, who was singing to me and dancing for me...shaking her booty at me. Later, while she was singing \"Baby Got Back\" w/ her gf\'s, she gave me a lap dance. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/shocked.gif[/img] Now this led to attention from other girls and I think it was because I didn\'t let the lap dance phase me a bit. I played it cool. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/cool.gif[/img]

    The irony of all this was that I still ended up driving home in rush hour traffic...the next morning, that is. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img] [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tongue.gif[/img] [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

    As far as my phero use: 2 drops of AE/m and 1/2 gel pack of SoE applied about 2 hrs before my interview. I applied another 1/2 gel pack of SoE before going to hooters and about 4-5 hrs after my initial application. At the bar, I applied another 1/2 a gel pack of SoE and the rest after my lap dance...I probably would have freshed w/ pherogel if I\'d had dome on me. Kat was giddy and she had stopped drinking about an hour before this...said she wanted to be sober for later. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tongue.gif[/img]

    Now, I think most of this experience had more to do w/ my hand tailored suit, my favorite Jerry Garcia tie and a blue shirt to accent my eyes. That and the way I handled myself. I didn\'t ogle the women at Hooter\'s; yea, sure I checked a few out here and there but that\'s entirely different. I was dressed well and exercised the 3 C\'s: Confidence, Control and Challenge. I didn\'t go hang around, like a puppy dog, after Kat the lap dance. I waited to go talk to her...when I was ready. The common thread was my attire, my attitude and humor. Each girl that paid any extra attention to me, I had laughing ASAP. Girls love to laugh and if you can cause them to feel that right away, it can work wonders.

    Hey Mods-
    You think I should move this to a separate thread or do you think it\'s on-topic enough to stay. I didn\'t initially set out to share a \"hit story\", it just knida came out that way. If ya wanna move it, ain\'t nothin\' to me, man. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]

  16. #16
    Phero Pro
    Join Date
    May 2002
    Location
    Emerald City, Evergreen State
    Posts
    718
    Rep Power
    8064

    Default Re: Fear

    Sagacious,

    You\'re not the only one that has had a hit or been a hit at Hooters: http://www.server2.love-scent.com/ubbthreads/showflat.php?Cat=&amp;Board=UBB5&amp;Number=26586& amp;Forum=All_Forums&amp;Words=Makes%20you%20happy &amp;Match=Entire%20Phrase&amp;Searchpage=0&amp;Li mit=25&amp;Old=1year&amp;Main=26586&amp;Search=tru e#Post26586

    And I still have that receipt. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

    --------------------
    <font color=\"blue\"> -SwingerMD </font>

  17. #17
    Enlightened One
    Join Date
    Feb 2002
    Posts
    4,678
    Rep Power
    8372

    Default Re: Fear

    My line - i think youre hot, wanna cum back to my place and have sex with me.

    Works every time, well every now and then 1 in 200 still better odds then doing nothing where the odds of a female asking you 1 in 50000. Trust me on that 200:1 compared to 50000:1 so get to work.

  18. #18
    Full Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2003
    Posts
    154
    Rep Power
    7661

    Default Re: Fear

    </font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
    Works every time

    <hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">


    </font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
    well every now and then

    <hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">


    </font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
    1 in 200

    <hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">


    Haha! Watcher, you\'re one of the funniest guys I know. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]


    Hungry

  19. #19
    Phero Guru Sagacious1420's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2003
    Posts
    1,537
    Rep Power
    7718

    Default Re: Fear

    OK, that\'s two deletions in a row...trying to be politically correct, instead of being honest.

    Biting my tongue like there\'s no tomorrow.

    But, oh the temptation to be truthful!

  20. #20
    Full Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2003
    Posts
    154
    Rep Power
    7661

    Default Re: Fear

    </font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
    Makes you wonder, if there are scents for other emotions.

    <hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">

    There\'s this girl at work who can always pick it when I\'m in a bad mood. Nobody else can tell because I never let it show and I act calm and happy, but she always knows. She\'ll go quiet and throw me cautious looks and avoid me the whole day. I always wondered how she knew. I must admit, I never considered scent.


    Hungry

  21. #21
    Full Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2003
    Posts
    154
    Rep Power
    7661

    Default Re: Fear

    </font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
    Biting my tongue like there\'s no tomorrow.

    <hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">

    Just say it, dude.


    Hungry

  22. #22
    Phero Guru
    Join Date
    Sep 2002
    Posts
    1,661
    Rep Power
    8013

    Default Re: Fear

    I agree with Sagacious. One has to \"get out there\" and learn how to be confident and it only comes from experience. We can\'t all be professional wine tasters but there are other things a person can do to build confidence in yourself. Volunteer to teach English as a second language, get a job in sales and read some of the motivational books, coach a kid\'s sports team and interact with the parents, just plain start talking to more people in your day to day life. The fear dissipates and you begin to realize that you are just as good as anyone else as other people begin to look up to you.

  23. #23
    Phero Guru Sagacious1420's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2003
    Posts
    1,537
    Rep Power
    7718

    Default Re: Fear

    </font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
    Volunteer to teach English as a second language... just plain start talking to more people in your day to day life. The fear dissipates and you begin to realize that you are just as good as anyone else

    <hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">

    Did the EASL thing in college and I learned, not only about other cultures, but about myeslf. Definfitely an experience that I highly recommend to anyone. As far as the rest of what I quoted here...definitely try to reach as many ppl as you can...don\'t just talk to women, try to relate to everyone. It\'ll pay off.

  24. #24
    Phero Guru Sagacious1420's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2003
    Posts
    1,537
    Rep Power
    7718

    Default Re: Fear

    Hungry-

    Thanks for your encouragement to \"speak my truth\". I just don\'t know if it\'s the constructive way to go. I really do care about this forum and trying to benefit the greater good, sooooooo.......i dunno. I\'ll think about it and if I feel that what I have restrained will benefit everyone, then I\'ll share it...otherwise....


    I can say that part of my hesitation has to do w/ very personal and deeply held social beliefs.

    But that\'s all you\'re gonna get for now.

  25. #25
    Full Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2003
    Posts
    154
    Rep Power
    7661

    Default Re: Fear

    </font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
    I can say that part of my hesitation has to do w/ very personal and deeply held social beliefs.

    <hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">

    That\'s cool. Don\'t say it if it makes you feel uncomfortable. I just tend to think that the truth, while often unpleasant, is the only way to move forward.


    Hungry

  26. #26
    Full Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2002
    Posts
    156
    Rep Power
    8012

    Default Re: Fear

    Thank you for your feedback. I think I will try the same method as you use for eliminate fear of snakes, heights etc - by gradually exposing yourself to the situation until becomes normal.

    I can talk in front of 100 people without feeling nervous. I can also talk to women I know, or women who I have some non-sexual reason to talk to without getting nervous at all. I am decent at small talking.

    However, the thought of approaching women in a bar or in the street makes me feel as I would imagine someone with the fear of snakes would feel by holding one. I think the reason for this is bad early experiences.

    When I young (about 10) my popularity among girls was ok, my looks was probably about average (not that I had anything but vague ideas about what girls are for, but anyway).

    Then came my teen-age years, where my looks went to hell due to pimples. Since I noticed that my friends got interest from girls, but I did not, I got more and more uncomfortable with hitting on girls. I was simply bad looking (not very, but a bit, due to no fault of my own). I also was against using alcohol during this time, so I avoided parties and never developed party skills. I still had a small group of really good friends, but no girl friends.

    End of teen-age period. Pimple situation improved, I got laid by pure luck (met a horny girl at a friend place). It was nothing more then a one-night stand, since we did not really have much in common. I also started exercising so I guess my looks improved somewhat. Then God, who obviously hates my guts [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img], made my hair go grey. Hm, I though that would only happen to older people. Unfortunately I got lot of negative reactions from girls due to this which reduced the little confidence I got from my lay. A couple of years later I starting colouring my hair, problem solved.

    Then God struck again, making me starting to lose my hair. If my hair was not grey I could of course shave it off, since being bald looks much better then being partially bold. However, then it would be impossible to hide that my hair is grey, since the roots would show.

    So I think my fear comes from a systematic vendetta from God, or maybe from getting lots of early negative feedback from girls, combined with that I cant really improve my looks that much since I am already in decent shape.

    I also understand that looks is not my primary problem, the fear of approaching women that I am attracted to is.

    I see three realistic ends to this story:

    1. I continue to live my life as a monk (the boring option).
    2. I become a serial killer, killing every girl that ever turned me down. Does not really solve anything, unfortunately.
    3. I develop pick up skills.

  27. #27
    Moderator belgareth's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2002
    Location
    Lower Slovobia
    Posts
    7,961
    Rep Power
    8516

    Default Re: Fear

    </font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />


    Some researches found specific receptors in the mucus membranes of the nose for None/Nol.



    <hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">

    Interesting! Do you have more info or references I could follow up?

  28. #28
    Phero Guru Sagacious1420's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2003
    Posts
    1,537
    Rep Power
    7718

    Default Re: Fear

    Ironration-
    Sounds like we had parallel lives...of sorts. I can relate to your earlier life and the strife of adolescence...most ppl probably could, btw.

    If you are going grey in your 20\'s, then I would guess that you have black, or at least very dark colored, hair. Yes? I had many black or very dark hair friends who turned grey at a pretty early age. This is common. I have medium toned brown hair and my grey has been pretty gradual and not over more than the past 5-6 yrs. I never was worried about it myself. When I was in college and a girl would come back w/ me for the weekend (we stayed at my Dad\'s place), they would invariably go nuts about my Dad\'s grey hair. So I always looked forward to it. When you hear enough \"sexy\" and \"distinguised\" comments about it, you actually begin to look forward to it. Go figure.

    As far as your thinning hair, I could see how that could weigh on your mind...I am just now having to face this too. Afraid I don\'t have any pearls for you on this one.

    Self-esteem and self-image go hand in hand. In your case, I don\'t personally believe that grey hair is the prob as much as the thinning hair. Could you agree on that? Nonetheless, the self-image can effect how highly you regard yourself, thus self-esteem issues. We see what we want to believe, sometimes. Look at the truly, clinically anorexic(sp?) person who truly believes that they are fat. Their distorted self-image leads to self-esteem issues.

    Oh [bad word]...it\'s sunrise...time for my morning zazen.

    OPT FOR #3!

    What flavor is the sunrise?

  29. #29
    Phero Guru Sagacious1420's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2003
    Posts
    1,537
    Rep Power
    7718

    Default Re: Fear

    ...rainbow sherbet: brilliant, luminescent, dazzling and vivid colors....fading into shades of deep purples, blues and light charcoal w/ a smattering of deep red...like blueberry swirl. Yuuuummmm!

  30. #30
    Moderator belgareth's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2002
    Location
    Lower Slovobia
    Posts
    7,961
    Rep Power
    8516

    Default Re: Fear

    Grey hair, thin or half bald mean next to nothing! Attitude and belief are everything. With less than half a head of greying hair and a beard that is nearly white I am in a position to know. If you believe it matters, it does. Many women think it matters but far more don\'t.

    Your biggest mistake is where you go. Bars and clubs are fine if you are in the top five percent in looks but ninety five percent of us are not in that catagory. And guess what, many of the finest ladies don\'t go to such places. One of the best looking ladies I\'ve ever known I met while giving a presentationt to group of junoir high school kids. Met another while researching a project at a local university. Still another at a swimming pool. In each case, I had no competition and was able to make conversation without six other people trying to horn in.

    First, believe in yourself and second, stop believing the hyperbole that you see on television. A great attitude, self confidence, a sense of humor and excellent manners will get you far more women than any other method I have seen.

Page 1 of 2 1 ... LastLast

Thread Information

Users Browsing this Thread

There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)

Similar Threads

  1. Newbies please Click Here! + Best Threads
    By franki in forum Pheromone Discussion
    Replies: 18
    Last Post: 09-25-2007, 05:07 PM
  2. Getting the Fear, then getting Out. Finding Bozo.
    By Icarus in forum Pheromone Discussion
    Replies: 26
    Last Post: 08-09-2003, 01:18 AM
  3. Solution to Fear
    By ironration in forum Pheromone Discussion
    Replies: 10
    Last Post: 07-08-2003, 11:50 AM
  4. difference between dihl and anxiety and fear?...
    By **DONOTDELETE** in forum Pheromone Discussion
    Replies: 7
    Last Post: 08-20-2002, 12:30 PM
  5. The Fear of Stinking
    By Bruce in forum Archives 1
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 12-05-2001, 08:05 AM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •