I the Penis

[TBiRD]

I The Penis

I, the penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons:

* I do physical labour

* I work at great depths

* I work head first

* I do not get RDO\'s, weekends off or public holidays

* I work in a damp environment

* I don\'t get paid overtime or shift penalties

* I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation

* I work in high temperatures

* My work exposes me to contagious diseases

Response from People & Quality:

After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have raised, the administration rejects your request for the following reasons:

* You do not work 8 hours straight

* You fall asleep on the job after brief work periods

* You do not always follow the orders of the management team

* You do not stay in your allocated position, and often visit other areas

* You take a lot of non-rostered breaks

* You do not take initiative - you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working

* You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift

* You don\'t always observe OH&S measures, such as wearing the correct protective outfits

* You don\'t wait till pension age before retiring

* You don\'t like working double shifts

* You sometimes leave your allocated position before you have completed the day\'s work

* And if that were not all, you have been seen constantly entering and leaving the work place carrying 2 suspicious looking bags !!!!!!!!!! [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img] [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img] [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img] [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img] [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

[Elana]

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I, the penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons:

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Yeah....I\'ll give you a raise [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img]

[TBiRD]

Great so u got my pm and decided to light my fire [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img] ???

[Elana]

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Great so u got my pm and decided to light my fire ???

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[img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img] I just want to help with your injury. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smirk.gif[/img]

[krtel]

LOL. The penis is a slacker!

- Krish

[Sagacious1420]

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LOL. The penis is a slacker!

- Krish

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Does that mean that I\'m a professional penis, then? Must be so..... [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smirk.gif[/img]

[Andy]

Uuuh ... this sounds too much like a male hooker to me. You shouldn\'t say that this way.

I\'d prefer the term cowboy, with the dick hangin\' loose in the holster. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

[Elana]

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I\'d prefer the term cowboy, with the dick hangin\' loose in the holster.

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That\'s a very nice thought [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]

[Andy]

Too bad that it takes always so long for me to get my weapon triggered and shoot. I am really good at quick reloading and high accuracy shooting though. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

[TBiRD]

Guns ? ok then...guns [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]


TBiRD [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/cool.gif[/img] &lt;---------- Bazooka !


Kawooooooooooooooooooooooom ! [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smirk.gif[/img]

[tallmacky]

No one is a bazooka. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

[TBiRD]

Exactly ! No one but me [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/shocked.gif[/img]

[Andy]

\"No officer, she was just riding me and BAM she exploded right on my hips and left an awful mess of blood, entrails and sperm.\"

[TBiRD]

yuk! YOu\'re into snuff stuff ? What a freaky mind....

[Elana]

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\"No officer, she was just riding me and BAM she exploded right on my hips and left an awful mess of blood, entrails and sperm.\"

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Andy! [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/shocked.gif[/img] That was gross. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]

[Andy]

Hey hey, I didn\'t bring up this bazooka stuff. I just turned it into standup comedian stuff.

Yuk ... no snuff stuff for me, thanks.