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  1. #1
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    Default Dad\'s favorite sayings.

    visit-red-300x50PNG
    * Go ask your mother.

    * Just wait until I get you home.

    * I love you, son!

    * I love you, princess!

    * When I was your age....

    * My father used to tell me....

    * I used to walk to school in the snow.

    * Be home early.

    * That\'s not a tear, I have something in my eye.

  2. #2
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    Default Re: Dad\'s favorite sayings.

    * Boy! Don\'t get a toe tag!!!

    * Someone smells like they need an autopsy!


  3. #3
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    Default Re: Dad\'s favorite sayings.

    * Why can\'t you have sex the silent way?

    * Do what you want, but you\'ll pay for the child yourself! [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

  4. #4
    Pheromaniac Sexyredhead's Avatar
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    Default Re: Dad\'s favorite sayings.

    * Don\'t make me come in there!!!

    * It\'ll feel better when it quits hurting. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tongue.gif[/img]

    * And if a frog had wings, he wouldn\'t bump his a$$ when he hops...

  5. #5
    Moderator belgareth's Avatar
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    Default Re: Dad\'s favorite sayings.

    [quote
    * It\'ll feel better when it quits hurting. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tongue.gif[/img]

    It\'s been a long time since I heard that. My kids don\'t think it\'s any funnier than I thought it was at the time.

  6. #6
    Administrator Bruce's Avatar
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    Default Re: Dad\'s favorite sayings.

    There is one thing that my dad said from time to time that always brings back warm memories:
    \"Thank God! I thought he cut your leg off.\"

    Any guesses why he used to say that?
    Hint: I had a sister two years younger than me (well, still do).

    Answer: As you could expect, my sister and I would get into all sorts of fights and she being smaller would have to resort to crying and screaming to get my parents involved to win the battles. Well, if she over-did the dramatics and my dad came running thinking there was something serious up, he would burst into the room and say:
    \"What happened?\"
    my sister: \"He threw my Barbie doll out the window\"
    Dad: (sigh of relief) \"Thank God..... \"

    I loved that.

    B

  7. #7
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    Default Re: Dad\'s favorite sayings.

    Nobody go in the bathroom for about 35, 45 minutes. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tongue.gif[/img]

  8. #8
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    Default Re: Dad\'s favorite sayings.

    Get out in the street while I go start the car!! [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/crazy.gif[/img]

    Don\'t make me get ignorant in public!! [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/crazy.gif[/img]

    You\'re part of me, and I don\'t want nothing happening to you wild man. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

    Go ask your momma! [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/confused.gif[/img]

    You\'re lucky your head is tied on! [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/crazy.gif[/img]

    The more I try to teach you, the dummer I get! [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/blush.gif[/img]

    Boy! You don\'t have sense enough to pour piss out of a boot, with the directions on the bottom of the heel! [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/crazy.gif[/img]

  9. #9
    Moderator belgareth's Avatar
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    Default Re: Dad\'s favorite sayings.

    Would you like me to give you something to cry about?

  10. #10
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    Default Re: Dad\'s favorite sayings.

    </font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
    Would you like me to give you something to cry about?

    <hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">

    [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img] [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img] [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/cool.gif[/img] [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img] [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img] Had forgotten that one! [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]

  11. #11
    Moderator belgareth's Avatar
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    Default Re: Dad\'s favorite sayings.

    The dreaded question...

  12. #12
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    Default Re: Dad\'s favorite sayings.

    A question in which my answer was always, \"No Sir.\" [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/cool.gif[/img]

  13. #13
    Moderator belgareth's Avatar
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    Default Re: Dad\'s favorite sayings.

    As I staged a hasty retreat

  14. #14
    Administrator Bruce's Avatar
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    Default Re: Dad\'s favorite sayings.

    </font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
    Would you like me to give you something to cry about?

    <hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">

    I got that one too. I think it was a popular way to get kids (boys especially) to stop crying in those days. I can\'t imagine saying it to my kids.

    Bruce

  15. #15
    Pheromaniac Sexyredhead's Avatar
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    Default Re: Dad\'s favorite sayings.

    My MAMA used to say that to me.

    It shut me up quick, I\'ll say that. \'Course I was usually crying just to irritate her or embarrass her in public.

    Her other favorite was, \"You pick the place, I\'ll pick the punishment.\"
    That stopped me and my sister from making loud public scenes to get what we wanted pretty quick. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/blush.gif[/img]

  16. #16
    Administrator Bruce's Avatar
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    Default Re: Dad\'s favorite sayings.

    </font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
    My MAMA used to say that to me.

    Her other favorite was, \"You pick the place, I\'ll pick the punishment.\"
    That stopped me and my sister from making loud public scenes to get what we wanted pretty quick. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/blush.gif[/img]

    <hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">

    Actually, I kinda like that one. A lot of kids will try stuff in public they would never do at home, because parents are often afraid to use discipline in public.

    B

  17. #17
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    Default Re: Dad\'s favorite sayings.

    My mother would say, \"Do you think it\'s your birthday?\", meaning special treatment was not in the works. My dad would say, \"Baby, I love you.\" - this was before the song.

  18. #18
    Pheromaniac Sexyredhead's Avatar
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    Default Re: Dad\'s favorite sayings.

    My mama could put the fear of God into you with a look. All the way up until I turned 25 or so. One look and you\'d sit down and shut up and wish you\'d never even thought about what you were about to do.

    Doesn\'t work so well now. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]

  19. #19
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    Default Re: Dad\'s favorite sayings.

    I knew I was in trouble when....I heard my first, middle, and last name. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/crazy.gif[/img]

  20. #20
    Moderator belgareth's Avatar
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    Default Re: Dad\'s favorite sayings.

    </font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
    I knew I was in trouble when....I heard my first, middle, and last name. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/crazy.gif[/img]

    <hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">

    My dad\'s worst warning sign was a raised eybrow, lookout!

  21. #21
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    Default Re: Dad\'s favorite sayings.

    Yeah, first middle last name and I knew I was in some sh*t.

    My dad has always worn glasses too, and then he would look at me over the glasses w/ the sit down, shut up, look...I knew exactly what to do.

  22. #22
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    Default Re: Dad\'s favorite sayings.

    \"Ohhh, keep it up! I\'ll take you out and make another one that looks just like you.\"

    [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]

    That, and irritation from my father and his mocking me \"Mama said. Mama said. You think just because your mother said, that\'s what I have to do. Is that what you think? Well, you\'re right ... ok, what did she send you over here to tell me to do?\"

    And my mother acting jubilant when I threatened to run away from home. \"Running away! Honey? (to my father), she\'s running away from home! (taking me by the hand) Come on, I\'ll help you pack.\" I actually did leave once with a suitcase packed. Walked around the block and came home. Mom was waiting in the doorway, took the suitcase out of my hand, smiling, and nothing more was ever said about it.

  23. #23
    Moderator belgareth's Avatar
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    Default Re: Dad\'s favorite sayings.

    My daughter used to challenge her step mom that way. \"Well, I\'ll just run away then!\" One day my wife got a suitcase down and started putting clothes in it. When asked what she was doing, my wife said she was helping her pack. My daughter threatened to call me at work and my wife handed her the phone. I nearly choked trying not to laugh over the phone.

    That was the last time that threat was made.

  24. #24
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    Default Re: Dad\'s favorite sayings.

    My dad never hit me in his life, but my mother did her best to smack the fool out of me ... did you ever get this:

    \"I\'m gonna make you THINK fill in the blank.\"

    As in, \"I want a Barbie! Why can\'t I have a Barbie! Everybody else has a Barbie!\" Mom: I said no. \"But why? Why can\'t I? I want a Barbie.\"

    \"I\'m gonna make you THINK Barbie.\"
    Delivered with The Look.

    That would be the signal to step out of striking distance.

  25. #25
    Administrator Bruce's Avatar
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    Default Re: Dad\'s favorite sayings.

    </font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
    My dad never hit me in his life, but my mother did her best to smack the fool out of me ... did you ever get this:

    \"I\'m gonna make you THINK fill in the blank.\"

    As in, \"I want a Barbie! Why can\'t I have a Barbie! Everybody else has a Barbie!\" Mom: I said no. \"But why? Why can\'t I? I want a Barbie.\"

    \"I\'m gonna make you THINK Barbie.\"
    Delivered with The Look.

    That would be the signal to step out of striking distance.

    <hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">

    My mom never hit me that I can remember. I don\'t think my dad ever *wanted* to hit me, or established hitting in his mind as a policy. He would just stress out too much and lose it every now and then. Drinking may have played a roll. In his older years he used to swear that he never hit either my sister or me. It never seemed like it was worth altering his reality at that point. I see a lot of my dad in me. Maybe that\'s why I don\'t drink. I never hit my kids, but in my own way I guess I \"lose it\" from time to time and impliment irrational policies in their regard.
    Bruce

  26. #26
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    Default Re: Dad\'s favorite sayings.

    My mother was that way. It really had nothing to do with me - most of the time she was mad at my dad and I didn\'t even know she was already angry, and would get in her way and end up getting the belt. Another signal to get outta Dodge was \"You are JUST like your daddy!\"

    That\'s weird, Bruce, that your dad denies hitting you - my mother denies it now too. Do you think maybe they really don\'t remember?


  27. #27
    Administrator Bruce's Avatar
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    Default Re: Dad\'s favorite sayings.

    </font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />

    That\'s weird, Bruce, that your dad denies hitting you - my mother denies it now too. Do you think maybe they really don\'t remember?



    <hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">

    I think it is a common phenomenon. Hitting a child in anger is likely to mess your head up and if you throw alcohol into the mix, I am not surprised they don\'t remember. In fact, I did a double take when I realized I wrote about my dad\'s \"denial\" and insisted that I had never hit my kids in the same message. I really combed my memory about that to make sure I am not deluding myself just like my dad. One thing I have done a number of times is drag one or the other of my kids by the arm and sort of roughly \"put\" him in his room for a \"time out\". They always end up crying and pretty freaked out. It\'s not so good and I sit down with them when I pull myself together and apologize.

    Anyway, my point is that, probably all parents do irrational things to their kids in anger that they wish they hadn\'t done and then enter into some kind of denial.

    Bruce

  28. #28
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    Default Re: Dad\'s favorite sayings.

    I\'m sure you\'re right.

  29. #29
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    Default Re: More about dads.

    \"Walk a little slower daddy,\" said a child so small. \"I\'m following in your footsteps and I don\'t want to fall.

    Sometimes your steps are very fast,
    Sometimes they\'re hard to see;
    So walk a little slower, Daddy,
    For you are leading me.

    Someday when I\'m all grown up,
    You\'re what I want to be;
    Then I will have a little child
    Who\'ll want to follow me.

    And I would want to lead just right,
    And know that I was true;
    So, walk a little slower, Daddy,
    For I must follow you.\"

    [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]

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