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  1. #61
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    Default Re: Masturbation or Sex

    visit-red-300x50PNG
    thats her boyfriend, it\'s that or a limp sausage. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/shocked.gif[/img]

  2. #62
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    Default Re: Masturbation or Sex

    Exactly..Yohimbe negatively reacts with Caffeine, Cheese, Milk, alcohol, etc.. Besides being unlawful, you are being untruthful to that person.

  3. #63
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    Default Re: Masturbation or Sex

    I like Yohimbe, but you have to be careful with the dosage, what you take it with, and when you take it(not before bed). do not take more than 800-1100mg at one time anything over that could potentially cause some serious problems.

  4. #64
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    Default Re: Masturbation or Sex

    Well here in NYC girls tell them strait up, and dump them right on the spot. Since your leaving her with no other choices to make that is what I suggest her to do, if you don\'t tell him now about himself and his worthless 1 minute man ASS, your going to go through the pain of not telling him anything just because you want to be \"nice\" and you\'ll never have to chance to be with a real man with an actual sex drive! or you can cheat on him and you\'ll have both of both worlds a guy with a sex drive and no social skills and the nice guy you just hang out with and talk.

  5. #65
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    Default Re: Masturbation or Sex

    Cheating is bad..marijuana is bad..hehehe

  6. #66
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    Default Re: Masturbation or Sex

    To be truthful, I should talk to him and give him the suggestions you guys gave me including taking Yohimbe with warning. As I said, he is 27, and I think he is too embarassed to talk to his friends about this. I may be the only person who can give him advice. I don\'t know how he would take it though.

  7. #67
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    Default Re: Masturbation or Sex

    I think it will be ok since you guys are friends too. I\'m sure he wants to better himself. Tell him you guys will work on it together if you want.

  8. #68
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    Default Re: Masturbation or Sex

    I wish you luck with that [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img], in those situations it\'s Go or NO, if he\'s understanding he will try to better himself, if he\'s just ignorant he will take it as an insult and only g-d knows what will happen then [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/frown.gif[/img].

  9. #69
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    Default Re: Masturbation or Sex

    </font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
    Well here in NYC girls tell them strait up, and dump them right on the spot. Since your leaving her with no other choices to make that is what I suggest her to do, if you don\'t tell him now about himself and his worthless 1 minute man ASS, your going to go through the pain of not telling him anything just because you want to be \"nice\" and you\'ll never have to chance to be with a real man with an actual sex drive! or you can cheat on him and you\'ll have both of both worlds a guy with a sex drive and no social skills and the nice guy you just hang out with and talk.

    <hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">

    Well, I had both, and I stopped seeing the guy with a sex drive and moved onto this nice, intelligent guy whom I love to talk to. It\'s hard to find all in one body.

  10. #70
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    Default Re: Masturbation or Sex

    </font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
    It\'s hard to find all in one body.

    <hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">

    I think a few guys on here would dispute that [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img] [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tongue.gif[/img] [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]

  11. #71
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    Default Re: Masturbation or Sex

    Just like the all-in-one girls, they get taken fast. Got grab\'em while it\'s hot!

  12. #72
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    Default Re: Masturbation or Sex

    </font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
    Well, I had both, and I stopped seeing the guy with a sex drive and moved onto this nice, intelligent guy whom I love to talk to. It\'s hard to find all in one body.

    <hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">

    Yea thats true, and sometimes it\'s hard for a girl to make a decision on finding the right guy and they end up with lots of guys on their list, sometimes making some of them feel inadequate and then there called attention whores and c*ck teasers ect. I think it\'s the guys fault in the first place for thinking that he was or is exactly what your looking for, sometimes girls are actually looking for guys that are intelligent and social, sometimes it\'s never about the sex, but I like girls who are in balance and have a little of both. I always try to be both also to be able to please all of the womens desires and thats what I think makes me so successful with women, no pheromone can take the place of that.

  13. #73
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    Default Re: Masturbation or Sex

    Finally that\'s something that I just have to underline bold. It\'s hard to find the golden cut. I don\'t like girls that are unable to be naughty from times to times, but I wouldn\'t like ending up with \"The Cold\" myself (you know, they call her \"The Cold\" because everybody had her at least once in life).

  14. #74
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    Default Re: Masturbation or Sex

    [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]

    Just wanted to *click* in and say : Thank you very much , I had a great time reading all of that up and down (pun intended) / flaming / discussion [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tongue.gif[/img]

    ...lately it seems like more fights happen amongst forum members...everybody on -none OD ???

    Ease up dudes.......

  15. #75
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    Default Re: Masturbation or Sex

    What do you mean too much None,...I\'ll give you too much none! hehe j/k

  16. #76
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    Default Re: Masturbation or Sex

    Don\'t talk like this to TBird ..... I am the ONLY one who\'s talkin\' like this to him ... got it? [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

  17. #77
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    Default Re: Masturbation or Sex

    </font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
    Don\'t talk like this to TBird ..... I am the ONLY one who\'s talkin\' like this to him ... got it? [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

    <hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">

    Oh please....the only reason TBird is allowed to stay here is so I can use him as my punching bag. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

  18. #78
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    Default Re: Masturbation or Sex

    </font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
    It\'s hard to find all in one body.

    <hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">

    I beg to differ. They are out there. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]
    You still owe it to your guy to talk with him about it. You may have a lot of fun searching/experimenting for something that works.

    Good Luck

  19. #79
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    Default Re: Masturbation or Sex

    &lt;&lt;&lt;Oh please....the only reason TBird is allowed to stay here is so I can use him as my punching bag&gt;&gt;&gt;

    Erm....Does that..actually mean : I\'m YOUR bitch ?


    Well OK ! In your case I\'ll make an exception. But hey , I\'m not picking up soap for u , understand!?!?!

  20. #80
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    Default Re: Masturbation or Sex

    No soap ... lick her clean slave.

    While we are talking about licking anyway, anyone a good lick while beeing tied to the bed ? Spring is really messing with my hormones.

  21. #81
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    Default Re: Masturbation or Sex

    &lt;Can you think of any good way to let him know that he is actually just masturbating on me (or inside of me), not having sex with me, and I am not very happy about it, without hurting his confidence?&gt;

    Is it possible for these guys to change?


    babybird,

    I\'m going to tell you the same thing I told SexyRed. Stop wasting your time (I don\'t care how young you are) and get the hell out of Dodge. Don\'t even give yourself a chance to fall in love with this guy...you could end up horny and miserable all of your life.

  22. #82
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    Default Re: Masturbation or Sex

    To everyone:

    Everyone is trying to make their own suggestions, and it is up to Babybird to do future research (including examining her own feelings and emotions) before talking with her boyfriend about it. I, like probably everyone else, have heard about the benefits and risks involved with Yohimbe. I had an extremely bad cardiovascular reaction with it. Others will swear by it. Either way, I wouldn\'t slip anything in there without him knowing. If you can\'t talk about it with him and/or go through the short-lived frustration and embarassment he may retaliate with, then there is something wrong anyway.

    This is not to say that he won\'t be upset when you bring it up to him. But it will not last long, and you should stick it out. Some people will disagree, but I for one do not want to have to be using pheros when I\'m 40 unless it is for business or to heighten my relationship with my (hopefully by then) spouse. Ok, that sounded bad. What I mean is, I would hope to have secured a loving relationship before then. This may mean being patient and sticking around during the hard times.

    To Babybird:

    If he is really displaying the kind of emotions that you describe, he is concerned about it. And he WANTS to satisfy you in bed. I would suggest attempting thicker condoms or using two of them first. Also, experiment with different positions. But above all, guide him carefully through an erotic, oral session with yourself, so he is also pleasuring you while he learns. Great sex can be learned and bad sex can be worked on. Emotional connections and the desire to please the one that they care about cannot be. If the latter exists, great sex will follow.

    If he is aware of his problem (which it sounds like he is), first work on other ways to receive pleasure from him (ie. orally). If he really cares, he should not be hesitant to do this. Next, if he is still not getting better, talk to him about the ways we have previously discussed that may offer some help in prolonging his time.

    I hope this helps. As far as the whole \"wonderful guy\" package is concerned...who knows? Maybe there are guys that possess all the great qualities in one; however, many times these guys weren\'t born that way. As much as they hate to admit it, there were probably many caring females (like yourself) that helped them along the way by developing and working on various aspects of themselves. Remember, sex is one of these aspects; quality love, care, and conversation arn\'t.

    And Phantom, I don\'t think it is right that you refer to him as \"his worthless 1 min. a$$.\" Quite immature I must say. Too bad we can\'t all be like you. I guess not all of us were born sex gods. Maybe you should priortize you perceived qualities in a guy.

    But what do I know? I\'m only a 19 year old quixotic [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img]

    Good luck Babybird!

    -Observationist

    P.S.
    And Lucky, if she gets out without attempting to work on this, she may be missing out on the best thing to ever happen in her life. He can\'t help it right now and there are things that CAN BE DONE to fix this problem. What would you do if your wife received horrible scars from a burn in a car accident? She wouldn\'t be able to help that either...except, of course, there isn\'t much that can be done. Give it some time though, and I\'m sure you could still find her sexy and resume a sexually healthy relationship. I\'m amazed about how impatient you all could be. I wonder if pheros works instantly for some of you folks because it doesn\'t seem like you would ever let them develop and work out to your advantage over time.

    Peace out ya\'ll!

  23. #83
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    Default Re: Masturbation or Sex

    Babybird, you\'ve received some great suggestions. Premature ejaculation is realy hard to cure though, in my experience. The only thing I have seen that really helped was a cock ring.


    I think you should bring it up and get it out in the open - because he knows he\'s not performing well - it would probably be a relief to be able to talk about it. If it\'s embarassing, so be it. Don\'t you suffer in silence.


    Lucky\'s advice is good, though. Do you want to do therapy or do you want to have sex?? If he were 17, it would be a different story, but at 27 ...


    Note to idealistic quixotic 19 year olds with very good advice ... she\'s not married to this guy. And one difference age and experience makes is knowing when to quit. From Lucky\'s and my older woman perspective, this looks like a losing proposition. I join her in saying dump him and don\'t look back. That\'s what I would say if I were your mother.


    It might interest you to read a little about the psychological causes of premature ejaculation. But in any case there is SO much on the internet about it that I don\'t understand why he wouldn\'t have tried some things himself.

    www.newremedies.com has a good article with practical solutions - I scanned through maybe 15 articles on line and this one is concise.


    Good luck and let us know what happens, whatever you decide.


    Ok, young dudes, have it at, flame away. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]







  24. #84
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    Default Re: Masturbation or Sex

    FTR,

    (Realizing the sarcasm in your statement) Flaming would not get anyone anywhere; although I appreciate the invite [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img].

    \"I think you should bring it up and get it out in the open - because he knows he\'s not performing well - it would probably be a relief to be able to talk about it. If it\'s embarassing, so be it. Don\'t you suffer in silence.\"

    Amen to that. I do not retract my earlier statements, but I agree whole-heartedly that this is something that should be able to be discussed openly. I\'m just saying, be prepared for an initial repulsion from the idea from him.

    \"Lucky\'s advice is good, though. Do you want to do therapy or do you want to have sex?? If he were 17, it would be a different story, but at 27 ... \"

    Is it possible to have both? In fact, I\'m sure they would complement each other quite well [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img]. Either way, if he is as unexperienced as he sounds (and also considering the lack of attempted resolutions), it might be a little early for therapy. You should try other things first.

    \"And one difference age and experience makes is knowing when to quit. From Lucky\'s and my older woman perspective, this looks like a losing proposition. I join her in saying dump him and don\'t look back. That\'s what I would say if I were your mother. \"

    I am not going to argue against time and experience. It\'s just there are so many things she hasn\'t tried yet, and it\'s only been a few weeks of sex (probably the most he\'s ever had!). The kind of emotional growth that can come from working through this kind of experience is priceless. And I guess as a previous sufferer from this kind of problem (who has MORE than recovered I must say [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img]), I do not believe that this problem will be that hard to correct (once again, especially given the fact that she hasn\'t really tried anything yet).

    Well, I better rest my case soon, or I\'ll never finish this paper. Babybird, I think you have received probably the most diverse and informative advise you could get short of visiting Dr. Ruth (God-bless our lil forum). Taking risks is what life is all about (even if that sometimes means going against the advice of a highly experienced and educated woman who we should all be proud of having at our forum [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img]). Whatever you choose to do, I\'m sure it will be the best for your situation. If you don\'t feel like you are prepared to help him at this point in your life, pretending that you are and just being \"nice\" won\'t cut it. We all wish you the very best!

    -Observationist

  25. #85
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    Default Re: Masturbation or Sex

    TWO highly educated and experienced women. wink back atcha.

  26. #86
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    Default Re: Masturbation or Sex

    I think the older the woman is, the less time she wants to spend curing a problem with a guys she really likes when she could just find another one that doesn\'t have the problem in a few more dates possibly. not all are like this, but in general, the older you are the more ready you are to get your life on the road with a final relationship.

  27. #87
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    No, it really is that we\'ve been there and done that and can give good advice from our experience (of course your mileage may vary) about what\'s probably worth spending time and energy on and what\'s probably not.


    It would be different if they were married or if she were feeling like this is absolutely positively THE ONE.


    And of course the guys are going to be on the side of \"work it out\"; that\'s to be expected.


    But if you were a young person (bear in mind that \"young\" to me is anyone 30 or younger) struggling trying to have a relationships with a woman who was frigid no matter what you did, I\'d give you the same advice and I\'m sure Lucky would, too.

    Lucky\'s a married woman and I\'m committed to being single so it\'s not about \"final\" relationship. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]

  28. #88
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    Default Re: Masturbation or Sex

    Well I\'m sure you eventually want to find someone. After all, do you want to be alone when you get older?

  29. #89
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    Default Re: Masturbation or Sex

    Jeez, Cloud, you really have alot to learn about women! [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/shocked.gif[/img]

  30. #90
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    Default Re: Masturbation or Sex

    Cloud9, if I could ever give you or anybody else one thing, it would be this: your happiness should not depend upon other people. Maybe that\'s not what you mean. But that\'s what I hear with \"find someone.\"


    I could focus on that and marry again, but what guarantee do I have that he won\'t die before I do? Men usually do die before women. Or that I will end up taking care of someone infirm, which, while it sounds romantic, taking care of each other in your old age, if you\'ve lived the reality of home care of the elderly, you start to think a little differently. (My grandmother died recently at nearly 90 - changing diapers on a 90 year old with Alzheimer\'s who\'s cussing you and throwing feces at the wall is not my idea of a way to spend my own old age...)

    Just a different point of view - I don\'t say this to start an argument - most people feel as you do, that it\'s important to \"find someone.\"

    I\'m happier living alone and free to make my own choices at all times. The idea of dying alone does not bother me at all. I won\'t be a burden to anyone.

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