What's Best for On Going Advventures...

[babybird]

He uses a condom.

[Elana]

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So if you\'ve been using one then you will be expecting more with a man.

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No, no, no that is simply not true! We know the difference between a battery operated toy and the real thing. No piece of plastic can replace the feeling a warm, hard dick.

[Cloud9]

yeah I would, but since I have only been with one woman and with her for the rest of my life I don\'t think I would be a great candadate for that. I may have waited until I found that person I\'m going to marry to have sex, but I have done everything else with more than one person. I\'ve always gotten great comments. Ofcourse I\'m larger than average when it comes to sex and can go on avg 50min, so I think my view of things could be jaded in the sex by itself department.

[Cloud9]

if he is big enough you can get a larger thicker condom too, like trojan magnum..it would help him go longer. I guess your right Elana I wasn\'t thinking about the warmth and the effect of a real man being there.

[Elana]

I am going to need a break from this thread. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/blush.gif[/img]
So much talk about Full Members and my NPA....whew [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/blush.gif[/img]

[Cloud9]

They ought to have \"small\", \"average\", and \"large\" member...LOL

[babybird]

Some guys just know what they are doing from the first time and only improve as they gain more experiences. If they suck from the beginning, they just never learn. Is that the case for most women here? I\'m depressed a bit.

[Cloud9]

I have herd the same, but it\'s worth a shot to help show him what to do. If it doesn\'t work out then you guys can be good friends.

[babybird]

Cloud9 -

Thank you for your advice. I really appreciate it!

[Cloud9]

Your most definitely welcome! [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]

[Elana]

babybird- How old is the guy you are seeing?

[Cloud9]

Have any of you girls tried any products like that stimugel?..My girlfriend really likes a different product that does the same thing.

[observationist]

Babybird,
As every guy has gone through this at one point in time, I\'m going to try to share some information with you that might help. Geez, I hope I don\'t stir up too much trouble.

I think many females do not tend to realize the physical aspects in regard to males concerning your particular situation. Guys don\'t want it to be quick...in fact...it really sucks. What would you rather have, 1 min of fun or 20 mins of fun? Unfortunetely, you have to understand that it is something that is uncontrollable at first. Many people have their own philosphies on why this is. Some people I have talked to have felt that it is something innate in males in order to help them \"develop\" a sexual relationship with a life-long mate (ie. the diff. between a fling and a life-long sexual commitment). Other people feel differently. Either way, EVERY male goes through this at one period in time, so yes, it will get better.

I think what is most important now is that he is actually realizing what\'s going on. Many times a guy won\'t talk about it because he us embarrassed or has hurt feelings about it. Having your feelings hurt by yourself is much worse than having them hurt by anyone else. But thankfully, there may be a couple of things you can notice that will help answer that. Some guys will attempt the start and stop method. If he is, chances are he is also talking to his male friends about this and working on it. Some guys (what the hell, this is anon. - like me at first) will continue AFTER the have ejaculated without making any noticable signs of orgasm hoping to prolong it a little bit longer. And some guys will just stray from having sex with you, and attempt other ways at bringing you to climax (orally or manually...also me in the beginning). And some will just seem depressed or unhappy afterwards. Either way, if you notice any of these signs, he is probably already aware.

It should be fairly easy if he displays any of these signs to bring this up to him. Remember, this should be presented as something that you don\'t really care about (because you know he will get better, right? Come on....nod your head [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img], but would like to make HIM feel better about. This is a really touchy thing for guys, especially when the girl is more experienced. They feel like you are constantly comparing them to your previous, \"better\" lovers.

Anyway, if he is feeling inadaquate, he WILL get better. Subtly hint that you want him to go down on you (in the heat of passion while he is manually \"warming you up\" ask him to kiss or lick you). That should buy you both a little time. You will be sexually satisfied, while he can practice the sex without feeling pressured because he knows he is able to bring you to climax in other ways.

If you guys have sat down and talked about this and he is frustrated and wants to get better, he will find ways. Make sure he knows (I know, I know, planned sex sometimes isn\'t so fun) before you have sex. Many guys will masturbate beforehand and it WILL help them last much longer. Or you could give him head, then he can take some time to work you up (maybe 15-20 mins), and if he is young (as I am assuming he is) he\'ll be ready to go again in no time. He\'ll just last much longer. Make sure you guys are using condoms even if you are on birth control. If he is only using one, try two or atleast a diff. brand. This will help also. And lastly, for any guys with this problem (girls probably won\'t understand this technique) try this: Make yourself aware of your kegal muscle. This is the muscle used when you start and stop urination. You\'ll notice when you are having sex, most of you are flexing it in one direction (the same way you flex it to stop urnation) or not flexing it at all. Now I know this sounds weird, but when you are haxing sex, flex it like you are trying to start urinating. It\'s kinda hard to get used to it, but you will last FOREVER....it\'s awesome!

Anyways, I hope this helps a little. Every guy has this problem, and every guy deals with it in one way or another, but it might take a little while. Until then, have fun trying different ways to bring you to climax (but still practise the sex). If you really care about this guy, give him a little time. You\'ve only been dating for a couple of weeks you said. Sex already? Well, let him work on it.

If he isn\'t even aware that this is a problem (he has not shown any of the signs above), don\'t let your sex session (basically do not let your sexual passion subside) until you have gotten off (even if that means he performs oral sex). I\'m sure he wouldn\'t quit until he ejaculated [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img], then he\'ll get the hint. Good luck and be careful with his feelings!

BTW: How old are you two? If he\'s under 23 or so, this is the most NORMAL thing in the world.

-Observationist

P.S.
Try it also with you on top even if it isn\'t your favorite right now. You will have more control over how it feels, and he will last a lot longer that way. I know I can\'t even climax if the girl is on top no matter how long it lasts!

[observationist]

Oh, and from \"guy talk\" I have received from over probably 20 of my buddies, I disagree with what you said earlier. NONE of my friends lasted for more than 2-3 mins the first few times. I have a feeling this guy is in our age range as well. It\'s only been a few weeks, sex shouldn\'t be so important now unless you\'re not really feeling anything that could turn into love anytime soon.

[Cloud9]

The kegel thing for me is a double edge sword. flexing it prolongs sex, but if your flexing too much or too hard then it will make you go faster. Flexing it hard will help you get off faster if you are having trouble getting off, because it is massaging the prostate almost as if when a guy gets off..it feels good. Another thing is each guy is different and for me being on my back makes me go quicker usually. Now what would really help if the guy had time would to do kegel exercises each day. so when he is about to go he can hold and squeeze the muscle real hard and keep from going. The feeling will subside and he can go much longer/indefintely depending on how developed his muscle is. But this takes a lot of time to develope well.

[Cloud9]

I\'m not sure about that...My first time I lasted 45minutes.

[babybird]

Ok, he is 27. There is not much excuse for him. He said he never had a relationship longer than 6 months, and I suspect that his stories about past relationships were a bit exaggerated. Although he won\'t talk about it, I think he knows. He spends a lot of time in foreplay (I haven\'t reached orgasms with him, yet, though) and looks depressed afterwards. He said that it seems going too fast for him (We\'ve seen each other for the last couple of months and got more sexual for the last two weeks). He is still young and can go for the second in no time (the second time was not too much longer, either). Maybe I\'m too exciting for him. I should probably cut down my mones.

It would be hard for me to suggest kegel exercises to him, isn\'t it?

[babybird]

Thanks a lot, observationist. Your reply was very, very informative.

[Phantom]

Theres specials condoms that prolong erection like Trojan Extended Pleasure and Trojan Her Pleasure maybe you can be the one to purchase the condoms next time and get those specific kind. One of my best friends slips Yohimbe Extract drops into her boyfriends drinks an hour before intercourse, she tells me he sometimes lasts up to an hour more than usuall when having sex [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/shocked.gif[/img]. I think thats the best way to help him out without telling him directly. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]

[franki]

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I\'m not sure about that...My first time I lasted 45minutes.

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I guess most guys are nervous the first time. Either they come way too quick, or it takes very long. For me it was the last. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/blush.gif[/img]

Franki [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]

[Andy]

Slipping yohimbine in someones drink is a wonderfull idea ... it must be really nice to watch a heartattack if he has a heart desease without knowing it. Maybe it\'ll be just a bloodjam in the penile veins rendering him impotent forever. Nice idea ..... you might send me a pic if you wish and I\'ll tell you [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img]

Whew, 1 minute 2 times in a row *with* a condom is a really hard case. This might really be a case for a desensitizing cream. Maybe you are really to hot ...

[Phantom]

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Slipping yohimbine in someones drink is a wonderfull idea ... it must be really nice to watch a heartattack if he has a heart desease without knowing it. Maybe it\'ll be just a bloodjam in the penile veins rendering him impotent forever. Nice idea .....

Whew, 1 minute 2 times in a row *with* a condom is a really hard case. This might really be a case for a desensitizing cream. Maybe you are really to hot ...

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Yohimbe is safe if used properly and at the right dosage, I don\'t know where you heard this (just a bloodjam in the penile veins) because theres no way that can possibly happen, well only if your stepping of his penis!!, I don\'t think healthy 21 year olds are at risk of heart attack well unless he\'s 300 pounds overweight and eats 20 hamburgers a day, and drugs like Viagra lower blood pressure instead of raising it! they expand the blood vessels allowing more blood to flow throw, you must be confused with vasoconstrictors.

Andy, take your head out of your ass and think before you post, thankyou [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img].

[Andy]

And it has been prohibited in almost the rest of the world because it\'s perfectly safe, right ? And there has never been a heartattack on Viagra or Yohimbe, right ? The face of many people is blushing because their blood pressure is too low, right ? Have you ever heared of a thrombosis ? Guess not, because you wouldn\'t write such stuff if you already had. It\'s right that both are expanding the blood vessels and there is the first problem, your blood pressure might fall far below normal (blackout possible) and as soon as they are getting back to normal you might experience a thrombosis (strike and heart attack possible). That\'s why Viagra is available with prescription only (at least in europe). Yohimbin is much more potent with increased side effects, it\'s almost impossible to find the right personal dosage, at least the first times it\'s ingested.

Why are you getting so personal anyway? Because you\'ve swallowed wisdom from a barrel ? Tell the people that actually died from Viagra and Yohimbin that it\'s completely safe.

[Phantom]

Most people that die from Viagra and Yohimbe are the ones who usually combine them with Alcohol and other recreational drugs and are stupid and take megadoses of the stuff, people\'s faces flush because there\'s alot of blood flowing to their face, hence dialated blood vessels. The more dialated the blood vessels the lower your blood pressure is going to be, caffeine is a vasoconstrictor and raises your blood pressure by constricting your bloodvessels and making them narrow.

[Andy]

I added some things to my previous post...

Anyway, it\'s an unwanted intoxication, it\'s against the law and it is still dangerous, whether you admit it or not.

Ah well .. I don\'t think that this discussion makes any sense with someone that has written \"HAIL PROZAC\" in his sig.

[Phantom]

\"The mixing of Viagra and nitrate medications significantly increases the risk of potentially life-threatening low blood pressure.\"


That means that Vigra lowers blood pressure in the first place and adding other nitrate medications (vigra is a nitrate medication which increases Nitrous oxide) will lower your blood pressure to a deadly level!

http://www.ynhh.org/healthlink/cardiac/cardiac_4_99.html \\

What would you suggest for the 1 minute man?, don\'t worry I have nothing against you, I just hate Idoits and smartasses that think they know everything when they actually don\'t, they piss me off!.

[Andy]

And how can you tell for sure that the conditions are right when slipping it into someones drink ?

[Phantom]

huh? I don\'t understand your question [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/confused.gif[/img]

[Phantom]

http://www.naturesalternatives.com/herbs/yohimbe.html

I would suggest 2-3 drops of the extract listed above instead of the 5-15 drops they recommend, people have bad results with yohimbe because they use too much in the first place.

The one listed above is just as good as this one

http://www.fitnessactivewear.com/yohexliq2ozb.html

it\'s practicly orderless and tasted when mixed with juice.

[Andy]

Oh boy, you suggested to slip yohimbe in someones drink ... don\'t you still get it ? I am not 100% sure, but as far as I recover it\'s a crime almost everywhere in the world. How would the person, that\'s slipping this stuff into someones drink, know for sure the person isn\'t taking any risky medications or has a heart desease thats .... oh, just forget it .....