Close

Results 1 to 16 of 16
  1. #1
    Banned User
    Join Date
    Dec 2002
    Posts
    1,330
    Rep Power
    0

    Default Turnabout is fair deal?

    visit-red-300x50PNG
    I have never quite figured out why the sexual urges of men and women differ so much. And I have never figured out the whole Mars & Venus thing. And, I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart. And, I have never yet figured out how the sexual desire gene gets thrown into a state of turmoil when it hears the words \"I do.\"

    One evening last week, my wife and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, \"I don\'t feel like it, I just want you to hold me.\"

    I say, \"WHAT?\"

    So she says the words that I and every husband on the planet dread. She explains that I \"must not be in tune with her emotional needs as a woman.\"

    I\'m thinking, \"What was her first clue?\"

    I finally realize that nothing is going to happen that night, so I have no choice but to go to sleep.

    The very next day, we go shopping at a big unnamed department store. I walk around while she tries on three very expensive outfits. She can\'t decide which one to take, so I tell her to take all three of them.

    She then tells me that she wants matching shoes worth $200 each, to which I say OK.

    And then we go to the Jewelry Dept., where she gets a set of diamond earrings. Let me tell you, she was so excited. She must have thought that I was one wave short of a shipwreck, but I don\'t think she cared.

    I think she was testing me when she asked for a tennis bracelet because she doesn\'t even play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I told her that it was OK.

    She was almost sexually excited from all of this, and you should have seen her face when she said, \"I\'m ready to go, let\'s go to the cash register.\"

    I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, \"No, honey. I don\'t feel like buying all this stuff now.\"

    You should have seen her face ... it went completely blank.

    I then said, \"Really honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while.\"

    And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, \"You must not be in tune with my financial needs as a Man.\"

    I figure that I should be having sex again sometime during Spring, 2010.

  2. #2
    Banned User Elana's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2002
    Posts
    7,600
    Rep Power
    0

    Default Re: Turnabout is fair deal?

    ummmm....this joke has been posted at least three times in the last few weeks. [img]/ubbthreads/images/icons/laugh.gif[/img]
    It wasn\'t funny then and it\'s still not funny [img]/ubbthreads/images/icons/laugh.gif[/img]

    smooooooch

  3. #3
    upsidedown
    Guest

    Default Re: Turnabout is fair deal?

    Elana.

    I think he\'s determined to post it until you finally find it funny and laugh! [img]/ubbthreads/images/icons/laugh.gif[/img]

  4. #4
    Banned User
    Join Date
    May 2002
    Location
    Good Old Europe
    Posts
    3,840
    Rep Power
    0

    Default Re: Turnabout is fair deal?

    I think it is not a joke, but reality. [img]/ubbthreads/images/icons/tongue.gif[/img]

  5. #5
    **DONOTDELETE**
    Guest

    Default Re: Turnabout is fair deal?

    None of it has ever been any reality of mine. [img]/ubbthreads/images/icons/smile.gif[/img]

  6. #6
    Banned User Elana's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2002
    Posts
    7,600
    Rep Power
    0

    Default Re: Turnabout is fair deal?

    OK...I\'ll bite.
    ROFLMAO!!!! Seadove that rocked!!!! That was the funniest joke I have ever heard. [img]/ubbthreads/images/icons/laugh.gif[/img][img]/ubbthreads/images/icons/laugh.gif[/img][img]/ubbthreads/images/icons/laugh.gif[/img][img]/ubbthreads/images/icons/laugh.gif[/img]
    [img]/ubbthreads/images/icons/laugh.gif[/img][img]/ubbthreads/images/icons/laugh.gif[/img][img]/ubbthreads/images/icons/laugh.gif[/img][img]/ubbthreads/images/icons/laugh.gif[/img][img]/ubbthreads/images/icons/laugh.gif[/img]

  7. #7
    upsidedown
    Guest

    Default Re: Turnabout is fair deal?

    >>OK...I\'ll bite.
    ROFLMAO!!!! Seadove that rocked!!!! That was the funniest joke I have ever heard<<

    Hey Elama...Thanks for falling on your sword for all of us so we won\'t have to read it again! [img]/ubbthreads/images/icons/laugh.gif[/img]


  8. #8
    Banned User Elana's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2002
    Posts
    7,600
    Rep Power
    0

    Default Re: Turnabout is fair deal?

    No problem, but I am not a Lama [img]/ubbthreads/images/icons/laugh.gif[/img]

  9. #9
    upsidedown
    Guest

    Default Re: Turnabout is fair deal?

    ROFL.

    A Lama? Oops...sorry about that. Freudian slip maybe? Nope.....lack of proofreading. Honest!

    ElaNa! You are too [img]/ubbthreads/images/icons/cool.gif[/img] !

    I would go back and fix it....but I\'ll just leave my mistake there for all history. Our children will be laughing at this typo 30 years from now I\'m sure.

  10. #10
    Banned User Elana's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2002
    Posts
    7,600
    Rep Power
    0

    Default Re: Turnabout is fair deal?

    <<Freudian slip maybe?>>

    Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr [img]/ubbthreads/images/icons/mad.gif[/img] [img]/ubbthreads/images/icons/laugh.gif[/img]

  11. #11
    **DONOTDELETE**
    Guest

    Default Re: Turnabout is fair deal?

    tee hee hee

  12. #12
    Phero Dude
    Join Date
    Nov 2002
    Posts
    617
    Rep Power
    7832

    Default Re: Turnabout is fair deal?

    I\'m sick of it, but I think it\'s funny.

  13. #13
    Banned User EXIT63's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2002
    Posts
    2,029
    Rep Power
    0

    Default Re: Turnabout is fair deal?

    ELAMA.....Now that\'s funny! [img]/ubbthreads/images/icons/smile.gif[/img]

  14. #14
    upsidedown
    Guest

    Default Re: Turnabout is fair deal?

    >>ELAMA.....Now that\'s funny! <<

    Yes, E-Lama. It\'s an internet phenomenon. It\'s an Electronic Lama.

    You say Elana, and I say Elama! Hey, I feel a song coming on.

    Oh well, to quote Shakespeare (which I seldom do), a rose by any other name would still smell as sweet.


  15. #15
    Banned User EXIT63's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2002
    Posts
    2,029
    Rep Power
    0

    Default Re: Turnabout is fair deal?

    I concur.

  16. #16
    Banned User
    Join Date
    Dec 2002
    Posts
    1,330
    Rep Power
    0

    Default Re: Turnabout is fair deal?

    <<<ummmm....this joke has been posted at least three times in the last few weeks.
    It wasn\'t funny then and it\'s still not funny

    smooooooch >>>

    It\'s eyyyyyther you don\'t understand my jokes or you know it already.

    I\'ll settle with the smootch part.

    Another joke is on it\'s way which I think youll understand.

    [img]/ubbthreads/images/icons/laugh.gif[/img]

Thread Information

Users Browsing this Thread

There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)

Similar Threads

  1. m word a big deal?
    By apple in forum Open Discussion
    Replies: 16
    Last Post: 03-17-2004, 07:18 PM
  2. Good Deal on Alter Ego and NPA (men's or women's)
    By Bruce in forum Pheromone Discussion
    Replies: 8
    Last Post: 02-26-2004, 04:16 PM
  3. Whats the deal with the baby?
    By TopDawg2050 in forum Open Discussion
    Replies: 26
    Last Post: 02-05-2004, 05:20 AM
  4. Group Deal on Computer stuff?
    By Bruce in forum Open Discussion
    Replies: 12
    Last Post: 02-26-2003, 09:00 AM
  5. What's the deal with HGH
    By EXIT63 in forum Health
    Replies: 9
    Last Post: 02-05-2003, 09:34 PM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •