WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your bra and panties.


WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not.


WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like a retard.


WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them.


WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can sing.


WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at four in the morning.


WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically converse with other members of the opposite sex without spitting.


WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of inexplicable rug burns on the forehead, knees and lower back.


WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people.


WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you.


WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause pregnancy.


WARNING: the crumsumpten of alcahol may Mack you tink you can tipe real gode.