Still having sex problems

[xvs]

These herbs work.

How\'s that for an outright statement? Anyone who knows me here knows that I don\'t just say these things -- I can back them up with research data.

But I\'ll leave that as an exercise for the reader [img]/ubbthreads/images/icons/smile.gif[/img] (Hint: you can do your own searches on Google and on Medline at (for instance) www.infotrieve.com.


Muira Puama
http://www.rain-tree.com/muirapuama.htm

This herb increases the ability to have erections and maintain them. The effect appears to be related to nitrous oxide, which is also the mechanism of action of Viagra. It is complementery to Viagra when used with it, and according to the literature is safe to use with it.

Dose: 30-60 drops of extract per day.

Maca
http://www.rain-tree.com/maca.htm

Maca has been shown to not only increase sexual desire and functioning, but also to increase fertility (sperm count and motility) and energy. It is also extremely safe, since it has been used as a food for well over 1000 years. Its mode of action is not known, but it does not affect testosterone levels.

Dose: 500-1500mg per day.

Tongkat Ali
http://www.amazingherbs.com/tongkat-ali-basak-bumi.html

This Malaysian/Indonesian plant has been used for hundreds of years to increase sexual functioning. Recent research studies bear out its effectiveness and indicate that it may produce increases in testosterone levels.

[CptKipling]

\"I can back them up with research data.

But I\'ll leave that as an exercise for the reader (Hint: you can do your own searches on Google and on Medline at (for instance)\"

And yet he provided you with the links, now that\'s a nice guy [img]/ubbthreads/images/icons/laugh.gif[/img]

[Lscread]

Thanks xvs for your post... I will try them!
And thanks to the rest of you for your comments.
Any other post are very welcome.....
Wolfe, can you tell me what vitimin supplement you are taking?

[**DONOTDELETE**]

You haven\'t mentioned previous girlfriends. How would you describe your sex life with previous partners?

[Lscread]

No problems at all with past girls. However they were all cute small type girls. This girl is tall and glamoris/ stuning. Also, my life is different now. When I was with other girls, I was younger and never married. Now I am divorced after a 20 year marrage. And this is my first girl since the divorce. In other words, this is the only girl other than my X in 20 yrs. So when I say I am different... I mean after the trama of divorce, I have emotional problems. FTR is right in that I find her looks intimadating. One night she had all her make up off and was sick..... as i sat beside her on her bed to care for her, I noticed that I was getting a ragging hard on. Funny how the mind works. She is one of these girls that REALLY needs her make up. Dont get me wrong, I love just as much with out it. But she really looks hot with her make up on.... but with out it she is not. I am sure that is why when she does not wear it I feel more at ease.

[**DONOTDELETE**]

Not to be putting down Psychology or Astrology, but sometimes things are much simpler than they may seem.

Is it possible that having sex with her is simply not the type of arousal that you have been accustomed too? That it is much different than how it was with your wife, and naturally masturbating is completely different, and you\'re simply physically less arroused when you\'re with her? Obviously, nervousness can SERIOUSLY WORSEN the situation. But I am pretty sure that if she\'d have sex exactly like your wife used to you wouldn\'t have any problem staying hard and cumming.

What I suggest is two things:

1. Stop masturbating completely. If you\'re not going to cum while you\'re having sex with her, don\'t cum at all. It\'s a known fact that the longer you go without masturbating the more sensitive you are to sexual arrousal (Just go read a teen\'s guide to sex, they recommend masturbating right before having sex with a girl to avoid premature ejaculation - - - so the opposite works as well).

2. Forget about her while you\'re having sex. Just think about yourself for a moment. And don\'t be too pressured to cum or to stay hard. Know that you\'re adapting to something new, and that it may take a bit of time. And that maybe you wont cum this time but you will the next. But really, forget about her! only AFTER you overcome your problem you should start thinking about her to better pleasure her.

These are my two cents, maybe they will make sense to you, maybe they wont. Maybe they\'ll work for you and maybe they wont. I\'d give them a try if I were you. But I do have one suggestion, if you do try some things, and those things don\'t work - don\'t give up. Keep trying. Don\'t ignore the problem because sex is just too important for a relationship to disregard.

Don\'t be pressured to overcome the problem quickly - it\'s not a race. Rest assured that you\'ll work through it eventually, as there is absolutely no reason you shouldn\'t if you keep trying.


Good luck!

[Lucky]

Would you like this girl if she weren\'t so beautiful? Would you want to be around her?

[Lscread]

I wont lie... Looks matter. But so does personality, and sexuality. She has it in all areas.....

[Lucky]

I know lots of real good looking guys, great personalities, sexy, cool, lots of money, etc.

Only 1, maybe 2, of them are guys I would want to live with.

Do you see what I\'m trying to ask you? What is your motive for wanting her? A trophy? Revenge toward your wife? She\'ll be a wonderful houskeeper? She\'s a brilliant conversationalist?

[Lscread]

lucky, you ask tough questions. Again I wont lie to you. I have been alone for four years. I dont have a job that lets me meet very may people. I am 43, so single girls are limited there as well. I have seen many freinds go years and years without meeting anyone. This girl has brought me love, company, friendship, intinacy, comfort, and healing. She is not a trophy to me. I wish she was not quite so good looking. It makes me feel insecure, and out classed. It has been hard for me to accept her love as real, but I am convinced that not only does she love me, but she is deeply in love with me.
So with my insecurities, its been hard to sort out my feelings.
But one thing I know for sure is that my life is so much better now than it was before her. She has brought LIFE back to my life

[Watcher]

And thats why good looking women end up with ugly looking guys, just way to much competition to try and hang onto him. Good looking guys are treated as attention and sources of looks but not as a source of sex, thats why they turn gay, they get fed up with attention seeking pigs of women who just want to have a giggle a flirt and annoy the [bad word] out of them wasting their time when they could be doing something else.

[oscar]

Lscread,

Do her in the dark, and pretend she\'s ugly.

Oscar [img]/ubbthreads/images/icons/wink.gif[/img]

[Watcher]

And if you cant find a dark place, place a brown paper airbag over her head and cut some air holes into it and make it quick.

[bundyburger]

Always wondered why gay men are gay and now I know. Too many women have pissed them off so they turn to the other side. [img]/ubbthreads/images/icons/crazy.gif[/img]
Thanks Watcher... I think you just helped all those people who \'research\' this into a final comprehensive yet simple answer. [img]/ubbthreads/images/icons/wink.gif[/img]

Men who get pissed off with women don\'t turn gay.(there may be exceptions, of course) Instead they stop being as nice to women and bad mouth them whenever they can. And get bitter. Which shows on the outside to women. Who then treat the guy with even less respect. It\'s a vicious circle for all but best of friends.

It\'s a balance Watcher. I have trouble finding the right balance. We ALL do, but you still have to treat them with respect. Respect and \'Not taking [bad word] from them\' are two different things.

[img]/ubbthreads/images/icons/smile.gif[/img] [img]/ubbthreads/images/icons/smile.gif[/img] [img]/ubbthreads/images/icons/smile.gif[/img]

[Watcher]

The final comprehensive answer is there in times of war (WWII) a large % of soilders turned to homosexual behaviour because no women were present, a parallel can be drawn with women behaveing the way they do towards attractive men. Men get pissed and some go gay because thats the only way to fill those sexual urges and another man is as sexually driven as the man so they do it (sorry myself dont lean that way) but have similar treatment for women. Ive just ignored it and if things get to heated sex wise i have a semi root thing going with this girl i know so we are bonkbuddies and it works well.
Respecting women is fine but as you say dont take a [bad word] bad word from them ever, then you are gone if you allow that to happen - thing is women keep trying it on however. They dont respect men mostly they see them as daddies, money, and sex and go through them like a dime a dozen, like i said no respect well not the young ones anyway (20-25)
As FTR has said as women get older they find they need support and start treating men with some more respect until they go through manopause and then dump the 50 odd yr old man because he is aging and isnt as exciting anymore, they try to find something better (although there are only so many young men going around <5%) who might be prepared to have sex with them so they end up complaining and staying single but at the same time complaining they cant find a good man. Ok go figure the delusion women put themselves through which mismatches their actions, but i shall shutup now.

[**DONOTDELETE**]

FTR NEVER SAID ANY SUCH THING. Mad, very mad! WATCHER, WERE YOU DROPPED ON YOUR HEAD AS A BABY?? WHERE DO YOU GET THIS STUFF?

[Watcher]

Sorry FTR, i think it was CJ01 when she was still active on the forum. Accept my sorries.

[bundyburger]

I don\'t know about you, but personally I don\'t have a problem with any woman who sees me as just \'sex\'. [img]/ubbthreads/images/icons/wink.gif[/img] [img]/ubbthreads/images/icons/wink.gif[/img]

Dude, I know it\'s frustrating. They do need to grow up. But all you have to do is handle the younger ones a different way. I get along with older women a lot better than I do ones younger than me. It works both ways. I occasionally (subconsiously) ignore and \'assehole\' girls who are my age in a similar way to how the younger girls treat guys, but I also can get along brilliantly with the younger ones by not taking [bad word] from them and generally just approaching the problem in a different way. But with respect. [img]/ubbthreads/images/icons/smile.gif[/img]

Just one last question: What\'s a semi root? [img]/ubbthreads/images/icons/crazy.gif[/img] lol

k... I\'ll shut up now too. [img]/ubbthreads/images/icons/cool.gif[/img]

[Wolfe]

Ultra Vita Man from vitamin world. also added a DHEA 25 suppliment

[Watcher]

Booty call, there when i needed, elsewhere when she wants to.