Lifes Equations

[EXIT63]

How is your algebra?

Subject: Life\'s Equations & Just how clever are you?


Life\'s Equations



* Smart man + smart woman = romance

* Smart man + dumb woman = affair

* Dumb man + smart woman = marriage

* Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy



SHOPPING MATH

* A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.

* A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn\'t need.



GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS

* A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.

* A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

* A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.

* A successful woman is one who can find such a man.



HAPPINESS

* To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.

* To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.



LONGEVITY

* Married men live longer than single men, but married men are a lot more willing to die.



PROPENSITY TO CHANGE

* A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn\'t.

* A man marries a woman expecting that she won\'t change, and she does.



DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE

* A woman has the last word in any argument.

* Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.



HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED:

· Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, \"You\'re next.\"

They stopped doing that after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.



SEND THIS TO A SMART WOMAN WHO NEEDS A LAUGH AND TO THE GUYS YOU THINK CAN HANDLE IT

[**DONOTDELETE**]

I got a good chuckle from these! Thanks for the grin, Exit.

[Whitehall]

I have to disagree about the equation for affairs - usually the woman is very smart!

[**DONOTDELETE**]

[img]/ubbthreads/images/icons/smile.gif[/img] [img]/ubbthreads/images/icons/wink.gif[/img]

[Watcher]

Haha the part about the old aunts at funerals i can use.