Singles Ads
Some of the most
instructive, hilarious, nauseating, downright creepy, and occasionally charming stuff I've seen are the singles ads
online. Very interesting, what guys think will work. Yahoo personals is a fave. Wish I had a dollar for every time
I've seen "financially independent", "moonlit walks on the beach", and "looking for that special lady". Some of the
most amusing have turned out to be guys I actually know f-2-f, the naughty fibbers!
What are your favorite
lines, goyls?
I ain't a goyl ( I am thinking about
having the operation though) but I'd like to reply anyway if I may. How was that for A-kissing? Good?
Yes?
The best/worst one I've seen was when I lived in Alaska. A very good looking guy had posted his desire
to meet a women. He stated his preferences right down to shoe size including that she had to have a pilots license
and own a plane. He then asked that they send a picture to him....of the plane!
LMAO! My sister and I were just talking about this the other day. Moonlit walks on theOriginally Posted by JustPeachy
beach was our favorite."
My all time favorite line that gets
me everytime is "I kiss you."
I met this guy from a singles ad.
He was everything he promised and so much more!
http://www.smlinks.com/sotw/Sohail/
The funniest one I've ever
seen went like this:
SWM, 21, 6'1", 175 lb. quirky with boyish charm looking for a female Pancho to spice up
his breeding activities...
Oh, wait...that's me.
Brenda And Pancho Swinging From A
Tree K-i-s-s-i-n-g
First comes love
Then comes
marriage
Then comes 3 years of hell, a horrible divorce settlement, and 10 years of alimony payments.
LMAO! My sister and I
were just talking about this the other day. Moonlit walks on the beach was our favorite."
The walk on the beach thing is always funny especially if they live in Arizona.
Another
favorite is height and weight proportioned.
DCW
It's always fun to try to
interpret what they are really saying.
*laughs*.... hmmm I will have
to do some reading in the single ads and get back to you on this one.
A great pleasure in life is doing what people say you can not do."
Singles Ad Translation:It's always fun
to try to interpret what they are really saying.
What they say:
I enjoy
music, movies, long walks on the beach, dancing, hanging out with my friends, pretty much doing anything fun and
exciting, going on adventures, reading, traveling, concerts, singing, cooking, dating, and just having a good
time!
What they are really telling you:
I have no interests at all and am a shallow, boring human being.
I like taking long walks on the
beach.
What they really mean is......If I don't have to pay for anything I like to do it.
Singles Ad Translation:
What they say:
I like taking long walks on the beach.
What they are really telling you:
I'm trying to
tell you I'm romantic, but I'm not creative enough to think of anything original---take this as a hint to where
our romance will be going.
I am curvy = I am fat
Singles Ad Translation:
What they say:
Outgoing, fun, looking for adventure
What they are really telling you:
I haven't been
out of the house in a few years. The day I actually go out, I'll probably be blinded by the sun, which could've
burnt out 5 months ago and I wouldn't have noticed.
I am into fine dining = My favorite
fancy restaurant is The Red Lobster
Singles Ad Translation:
What they say:
I am an enigma. I don't like to follow the trends, and I dance to the beat of my own drum.
What they are really telling you:
I'm bipolar, so back off unless you want to enter a world of pain!
Singles Ad Translation:
What they say:
Cute, cuddly with a great smile and charming personality.
What they are really telling
you:
I haven't been laid in months---wait, years.
wow, you two are real experts!
I like ham = I am Ssssssst
Meat/Beard Tomfoolery
I like ham in
a beard = I am Elana
"...and from that egg, hatched a stone monkey!" (Newton)
I like ham on a beard with hair on
the chest = I am Justpeachy
That one's pretty universal.
"...and from that egg, hatched a stone monkey!" (Newton)
I've been through the world of pain, I've met the trolls, I've seen the unoriginalwow, you two are
real experts!
people, and I've written all but "long walks on the beach" in my profile to describe myself...
Yes,
I know them well..
I've never actually put myself in a singles ad (I'd be too embarrassed...although I
do respect the guts it takes to put oneself out there for those who do), but I have looked through many others.
They're interesting.
Singles Ad Translation:
What they say:
I am a free spirit. I like to do my own thing and enjoy change.
What they are telling
you:
I am going to break your heart. In fact, I'm writing this while I'm still going out with the shlub I'm
about to break up with for your stupid ass.
I like the finer things in life =
hooker
I'mmmm...speechless. And nauseated.
That's pretty much my take on it! Here's another fave:
"I
want to share experiences"
Translation: "I'm gonna try the Sensitive Male routine and see if I can get in your
pants that way."
Ewwww!
I like a man with a Ferrari keychain and lots
of gravy = I am Elana
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