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  1. #1
    Enlightened One
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    Default Lots of articles on how good guys winning but...

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    Im reading plenty of articles on how good /nice guys are not being attacked and put down by females in society in general and how they get such a good deal (i however do not). One of the reality shows here in oz called big brother have been won twice by good guys/nice guy type of characters and the newspaper reporter (a woman) was saying how men who are nice get a good deal in life while the bad boys get no where.

    BUT

    when it comes to sex the bad boys still get it and the good guys get left on the shelf (interesting how the articles are coming out in local papers related to articles discussed here on the forum weeks proceeding) well it is a very good source of stories being popluar and very conterversial and related to sex as this forum is. Although it tends to take the feminist nice nice attitude prevelant in society well guess what youre wrong people the output here is the most spot on as reality should be. SO believe the attitudes here because they represent the last bit of reality left in this [censored] up world.

  2. #2
    Enlightened One
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    Default Re: Lots of articles on how good guys winning but...

    Bump within 10 minutes this post is already at the bottom anyone care to comment discussion can be a mans worst enemy allows women to over analyse and the idea of action change can be swolled whole through excessive verbalisation and not enough action.

  3. #3
    Enlightened One
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    Default Re: Lots of articles on how good guys winning but...

    Bump

  4. #4
    Enlightened One
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    Default Re: Lots of articles on how good guys winning but...

    Someone comment on this please lol.

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    Default Re: Lots of articles on how good guys winning but...

    personally from my observations, woman go for funny blokes, they always seem to do very well at pulling. Although your theory of the bad boy is true, so i would suggest, and i do this......
    When your with a girl act like your the funniest guy on the planet, and than when they are gone, treat them mean, trust me this drives them crazy, and they love it, and so do i LOL

  6. #6
    Phero Pharaoh a.k.a.'s Avatar
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    Default Re: Lots of articles on how good guys winning but...

    There are passive “nice guys” and aggressive “nice guys”. If you’re truly nice and have the balls to go out and introduce yourself to lots of women, you’ll get laid.
    Many guys that consider themselves nice are just passive creeps. That is they care only about themselves, their shallow pleasures and their big fat egos. But they don’t have the balls to show themselves for what they are. So they act well mannered and pretend they’re interested in a woman’s mind/character/personality.
    With “bad boys” (selfish creeps that have the balls to admit it), at least women know what they’re getting into.

  7. #7
    Phero Dude
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    Default Re: Lots of articles on how good guys winning but...

    well as a recovering \"nice/good\" guy all I have to say is that when I revert back to being the stereotypical nice guy the interest level from ladies in me goes way down, whereas when I adopt certain alpha male characteristics, I have no problem getting dates/getting laid etc. It\'s a sad truth, but if I adopt some of the tactics suggested on places like fastseduction.com and ignore the nonsense advice (for men) from female relationship \" experts \" to be nice, sensitive, thoughtful, listen blahblahblah etc. , my success with ladies goes way up. Now combine these strategies with phero products and it is a lethal combo. Nice/good guys do get gfs/married/get laid etc. but not as easily as the bad boys. Funny thing is every once in awhile I will revert to my old self and guess what another long dry spell so I\'ve about had it and figure if the only way to be successful with the opposite sex is to be the alpha so be it. I know there are many folk who are nice etc/ who are successful with women but I can only speak from my experience and this is what I have observed. Two diff. gals I knew in college - one in my sophomore year , other in my senior year - became very close with each, they\'d always say how \"nice\" I was etc., go to the lunch/dinner/movies etc with them all the time but no sex - everytime I tried to initiate things etc \"lets just be friends/don\'t see you like that/don\'t want to lose your friendship\" but when I try step away they cockblock me with other fems. And in each case eventually an alpha came along and within a week or two of meeting him they\'d be sleeping with him, he\'d dump them after some time, they\'d be crying on my shoulder and so on and so forth. To make a long story short, knowing what I know now from fastseduction and the pheros etc. I know exactly what I did wrong and one of the gals I\'m still friends with and used JB#1 with her, follow the advice on fastseduction and guess who\'s pursuing me now?? I fully intend to sleep with her if I can as she\'s giving me lots of signals, but unlike before I\'m not focused on her and I\'m seeing other ladies right now so I guess all this competition/lack of attention from me is getting her interested hey?!. I apologise if I\'ve offended any ladies on this board with my comments and I do recognise there are a lot of quality women out there just looking for someone nice and decent and if I met one of these ladies I\'d marry her in a sec., but I have had no luck finding a lady like this so...

  8. #8
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    Default Re: Lots of articles on how good guys winning but...

    great thread proteus.
    Its defiinately made me think

  9. #9
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    Default Re: Lots of articles on how good guys winning but...

    I\'ve known this one guy for about 3 years, he being 5\' 3\" is even shorter than me, but you should SEE that little guy work his mojo! The dude got so many women that it was scaring me! And that puzzled the sh*t out of me, until I read the info on fastseduction.com and realized this guy actually was a GENIUS! He would always talk loud, boisterously, touch women when it SEEMED uninvited, etc. I have always been a semi-dormant Dominant male, but we could ALL learn a lesson from this guy, BE LOUD, LAUGH LOUD, TOUCH WOMEN! Of course, I should advise that you use the last one sparingly, lest you get nailed on sexual harassment charges [img]/ubbthreads/images/icons/wink.gif[/img] but I have been experimenting, and the louder I get; the more the ladies flock.

    \'Slinger out.

  10. #10
    Phero Pro jose's Avatar
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    Default Re: Lots of articles on how good guys winning but...

    My experience is that what many of us guys try to do to attract women, ie. buying gifts, doing favors, constantly giving complements etc. It\'s seen by women to be weak, needy, and UN-attractive with ulterior motives. You have to be a little bit of a bad boy with a cocky attitude but at the same time don\'t look like a Dick. I find making women laugh and teasing them works wonders, also NOT bending over backwards to please them. Time and time again I find women say they want a man that can make them laugh,and not take any of their mind games. If you haven\'t noticed women do test us constantly, just be prepared for that and you\'ll do fine.

  11. #11
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    Default Re: Lots of articles on how good guys winning but...

    geees... is it really so hard to turn to a jerk from a nice guy when you wanna get laid?

  12. #12
    Phero Pro
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    Default Re: Lots of articles on how good guys winning but...

    That\'s right jose, mix some dry black humor, some teasing humor, add a good load of sexual oriented conversationand and say \"no\" once in a while to mark the territory of your will. Don\'t act like you are a completely stupid dumbass, just mix it in well parts. Mones are just the cream of the crop, a tool to make it easier.

  13. #13
    Enlightened One
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    Default Re: Lots of articles on how good guys winning but...

    Bump anyone who doesnt regulary comment would like to add 2 cents worth or even some females points of view would be good to even up the information being presented.

  14. #14
    Phero Dude
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    Default Re: Lots of articles on how good guys winning but...

    Poster: Kamikaze
    Subject: Re: Lots of articles on how good guys winning but...

    geees... is it really so hard to turn to a jerk from a nice guy when you wanna get laid?


    K,

    YES. A bit of personal: I was raised during childhood by my grandparents (mom was divorced); I was an Altar Boy (yes, literally); I was taught to help everyone because they\'re [insert relationship here]. That has gotten me nowhere. I *SHOULD* have a fantastic life, be married to a wonderful woman, and have the kids my neighbors do. Well, through three decades of trying to be the nice guy, helping everyone without asking for anything in return, \"seeing the good inherent in everyone, regardless of who they are,\" and showing my own \"inner good,\" since \"it\'s what\'s *INSIDE* that matters,\" I have none of the life that I believe I should have.

    I\'ve been told that I\'m \"too good,\" that I \"try too hard,\" that [here it is, guys] I\'m \"a really good friend,\" [ARRRRGGGGHHHHHHHHH] and that \"it would ruin our friendship.\"

    I\'ll agree that I *AM* too good for those females. The friendships ended anyway.

    Now, I\'m *FINALLY* on the mission. If I lose a few people in the process, so be it, but I\'m taking care of me. In some respects, I have probably become a jerk, though I\'m no longer a doormat. I\'ll be nice, but I ain\'t no slave.

    Yes, it IS hard to change from nice-guy to jerk; it takes a lot of self-retraining. I\'ve been, and continue to be, working on it. It\'s a matter, at least in my case, of walking away from your entire background and all that you\'ve been taught.

    BTW, I recently picked up a book, one of several, called \"SELF MATTERS.\" It\'s by Phillip McGraw. It reflects exactly my new philosophy. I\'d been beginning it already anyway, so it\'s not just a confirmation / validation of what I\'ve been doing, but somewhat of a \"how-to\" for those of us who\'ve always wanted to change but didn\'t know how.

  15. #15
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    Default Re: Lots of articles on how good guys winning but...

    i completely agree with you proteus. if a quality woman came along, i wouldn\'t care for other women...but they are becoming so hard to find...

    if i could find a great girl, i\'d commit myself to her, but for now, it\'s just about getting some action...sad but true

  16. #16
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    Default Re: Lots of articles on how good guys winning but...

    i feel for you RJM...it took me about a year to overcome it all...because you realize that people really aren\'t so special if they treat you like crap...so don\'t deal with it don\'t waste your time with em...don\'t hold grudges but basically don\'t let it bother you...just be like \"yea yea whatever i gotta get laid now see you later\" or somethin sarcastic haha. i still believe in goodness and all that but it doesn\'t apply to girls right now. just do what you want to do and believe in yourself...when you want to be nice to someone, they will come and they\'ll deserve it from you
    good luck

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    Default Re: Lots of articles on how good guys winning but...

    but what do you mean about treat them mean when they\'re gone?

  18. #18
    Phero Dude
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    Default Re: Lots of articles on how good guys winning but...

    Thanks... It\'s been a difficult ride, but it\'s getting easier. Hell, I didn\'t even mean ONLY females, though that\'s really the primary focus of this board. It\'s become everybody, once I stepped back and looked in from the outside.

    Here\'s a thought that sticks in my mind from that book (paraphrased):
    - People tell you that you shouldn\'t be so focused on yourself, because they\'d prefer you to be focused on THEM. -

    It\'s true, if you step back and look at things, but it\'s a b**ch to try to undo your upbringing.

    So, JPGR, how did you overcome the \"nice guy\" disease?


    Ahhhhh, well. I\'m feeling better in the life I\'m developing.

    \'til later!

  19. #19
    Administrator Bruce's Avatar
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    Default Re: Lots of articles on how good guys winning but.

    This is a good thread. It comes up every now and then. I always want to jump in, but a good response takes so long to formulate.
    So....
    I have to go with the \"be the good guy\" road, but with a few important clarifications:

    A. When I say the \"good guy\", by that I don\'t mean a \"goody goody\" type. Guys like that are often:
    - perceived as zeros who have no back bone
    - butt kissers to all forms of authority both good and bad
    - opportunists
    - guilt-ridden
    (this list could go on and on, but you probably get the idea)

    B. As I\'ve said before women (just like men) are programmed from childhood to be attracted to certain types of men. Some of these presets are healthy and some of them are self-destructive. They are hard to change. I\'ve seen a lot of blaming going on that it is somehow the fault of females in general that they are fataly attracted to jerks, but 1. I don\'t think that is true of all women and 2. I think that this \"fatal\" (unhealthy might be a better word) attraction is more a feedback loop than a one-sided situation. IE: Guys who are subconsciously looking for messed up women are getting turned down with the groveling routine when they could be scoring with healthy women who they are currently ignoring because they are \"good girls\".

    C. Finally, I think we need to take a look at the concepts of authenticity and credibility. IMO, women more so than men are concerned with trust in relationships, which is about believing that the person you are talking to is \"for real\". Maybe it really IS better to be an authentic jerk than to be a phony goody goody groveling for the crumbs off a woman\'s table, but you can also be authentically helpful, friendly, cheerful etc and clean up with women who are headed in a healthy direction, looking for a good husband and father.

    My 2 cents,
    Bruce

  20. #20
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    Default Re: Lots of articles on how good guys winning but...

    woman are funny creatures, however much we try to figure them out, the more dis-illusioned we will become!!!!

    i give up trying to impress the ladies, im gonna be myself, and if they dont like it, than they know what they can do [img]/ubbthreads/images/icons/smile.gif[/img]

  21. #21
    Phero Pro jose's Avatar
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    Default Re: Lots of articles on how good guys winning but.

    I recommend going to the WebSite www.Askmen.com the articles are interesting and you get a better inside look into a woman\'s behavior. The best articles are from doc LOVE, he also sells a book which is dead on about women.

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    Default Re: Lots of articles on how good guys winning but.

    totally agreed bruce...but at my age women aren\'t really looking for a good husband and father etc...and also, what guarantees they\'ll be a good wife and mother?

    but i think as women grow older they mature and tend to like the nice guy a little more...but when i mean nice i mean responsible and strong and all, not a jerk but a true gentleman who cares has feelings thinks beyond sex
    is sensitive but strong etc.

    but right now in the college years, i think pretty much being a \"cool\" badass who does what he wants to do and knows what he is doing is the way to go IF you just wanna get laid

    to somewhat compromise with myself, i\'ve given up on pursuing relationships for now with the mindset that when the \"quality girl\" comes i\'ll be committed to her...but she is so hard to find that the only thing i\'m interested in is a woman\'s body etc...it\'s sad but true...so right now i\'m just going with the flow, always remembering what i\'m truly looking for but in the meantime just satisfying natural urges

    and how did i change?
    hmm first my physical image...look much more \"cool\" now people are really amazed

    i plan to be a really good human being (father & husband) in the future, but right now i\'ve concentrated on keeping myself focused and happy...so now i don\'t care about random girls or strangers, i don\'t get attached to them, i simply wanna bang them, and somehow this is acceptable, at least much more than wanting a relationship

    i tell myself that i don\'t have to be mean
    to get girls i don\'t have to stop being nice...but i have to be more flirtatious and friendly and much more easy to figure out than rather the nice guy type who seems fishy perhaps or just asexual or whatever...either one is bad

    i just say what i want to say, make fun of really hot girls, embarass them and kinda be cocky...if i ever come across a nice girl and she gets pissed, i apologize real smoothly and then she forgives me and it turns out that we become real close friends and she terms me as the \"coolest guy she ever met\"...so if you are ever worried about how your being cocky and jerky will turn off a nice girl, well don\'t worry just say you were playing, be sincere and let them know the real you and they\'ll be happy to make up

    good luck to all

  23. #23
    Carpal Tunnel Whitehall's Avatar
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    Default What\'s a \"Good Guy?\"

    What\'s a \"Good Guy?\"

    Maybe the question should be \"What\'s a Good Man in our time and place?\" Young women often don\'t have a clear idea of what a good man is although they know they want and need one. The easiest way for them to tell is how independent he acts - that\'s why \"youthful rebellion\" is so common - whether its needed or not. That \"rebellion\"signals a courage to accept the consequences and that\'s attractive no matter the content of the rebellion.

    When they get a little experience, women realize that a man who\'s groveling at their feet is probably doing so because other females are also rejecting him. Likewise man who is telling her everything she wants to hear is probably making a bunch of it up. That\'s a loser \"good guy.\" A man who has his boundaries and knows and asserts his self-interest in a civilized manner (a winner good guy) therefore presents a good first impression.

    What I\'ve found about myself that seems appealing to women is the ability to provide clear guidence as to how to live one\'s life. Think about how successful preachers are reported to be with their female followers - clearly stating how you think one should behave is very helpful and reassuring to women in our changing and confusing times. Look at women\'s magazines for a clue as to how uncertain and confused women are. Like in the Jimmy Buffet song, \"she\'s looking for a man with a strong mind.\"

    One doesn\'t need to be a \"bad boy\" - someone anti-social - to be successful with women. You do need to be confident and have a vision of the future for yourself and maybe for that right woman (and your offspring.) Having a plan for your life presupposes having the courage to attempt to make that plan reality.

    Over the course of my life, a number of the women who in their younger years dismissed me as too much a \"good guy\" have come back and seemed much more appreciative with a little maturity.

    So my advice to the younger guys is think ahead for your life, make a plan, and show the courage and perserverance to live up to it.

  24. #24
    Phero Pro
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    Default Re: What\'s a \"Good Guy?\"

    It\'s like you want to have sex with a woman because no other has let you come near her undies, or you just want her because you want her. Don\'t seem needing, seem wanting. Strange, but I think you got it. [img]/ubbthreads/images/icons/wink.gif[/img]

    Btw, ever said to a woman : \"You have to come with me now if you want to have the best and most ecstatic sex of your life\" ?
    This started as a joke, advanced to a bet and worked at last. I am not sure how chances are and most likely you\'ll return with a red cheek, but isn\'t fun worth a lot ? Especially if you might have a great night and 2 bottles of Jim Beam additionally [img]/ubbthreads/images/icons/wink.gif[/img]

  25. #25
    Phero Dude
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    Default Re: Lots of articles on how good guys winning but.

    Okay, I\'m leaning more toward JPGR\'s view... It\'s just fun; never mind seeing God because I\'m sharing an experience of absolute love with her...

    JPGR:
    How did you change your image? I\'ve been working on my Bowflex and trying to eat better; quitting smoking is the next hurdle, for which I already have the patch. I also recently have been buying those wild shirts from Hot Topic (chain?) and other stores. Hell, I got rid of a pain-in-the-butt Chrysler sedan and bought a Fiero GT (yeah, yeah, it still gets looks, even better than my \'73 Chrysler.)

    Whitehall:
    I partially disagree with your assessment about teens acting as they do to demonstrate Alpha status. At least in my experience, the rebellion is an attempt to find oneself. That\'s a challenge I never really wished to take on; just figured I was doing what was right - what I was told was right, but have chosen to do completely, because I\'m sick of what I was.
    As far as women coming back with more maturity, I\'ve been rather fortunate, in that after I regained my sanity and self-respect, and left them, I\'ve only crossed paths with ONE, and she was married at that point.
    As far as teh \"bad boy\" image goes, I hope you\'re right. I\'m not going to waste my time getting into trouble for an image. I will, however hold to my standards.

    Bruce:
    As always, your insights are inspirational. My mistake in life was to be the \"goody-goody\" type. I wouldn\'t say I had no backbone, though that may well have been the case in some situations... I just put more weight to being with her, than to what we were doing, or where we were going. One thing I have always been though, is authentic; what I am is what I am, even though one or two things about me may be a bit unnerving to some; it is what I am. Amazingly, *I* who have always gone out of my way to not be a jerk, authentic or otherwise, have always been the one taken for granted.
    Oh yeah -- I wasn\'t implying that that was directed at me, though it may read that way... We all know these morons; one girl I know seems to find them in droves, and even after she breaks up with them, she stays \"friends\" with them. So, she must be so insecure and dysfunctional that she LIKES the jerks. I feel sorry for her, sort of...

    Hence the changes.

    Ace:
    Cheerio, dude!

    Wow, long post... Ahhh well, self-analysis is so much cheaper, and you can\'t be blackmailed with it! [img]/ubbthreads/images/icons/smile.gif[/img]

  26. #26
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    Default Re: Lots of articles on how good guys winning but.

    what did i do specifically? got contacts and an earring, started working out, wore better clothes because too many girls told me the importance of it to them (is the guy well dressed? personally i think it\'s lame)...i started becoming more flirtatious almost outrageous doing whatever the hell iwanted to do saying whatever i wanted to say and NOT treating hot girls like they were anything special

  27. #27
    Enlightened One
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    Default Re: Lots of articles on how good guys winning but.

    If all else fails OD on none and repel all the annoying ones then work on self improvement until you have what you want this co-incides with the looking after the self routine.

  28. #28
    Phero Dude
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    Default Re: Lots of articles on how good guys winning but.

    Ain\'t it a kick in the teeth though, how we are the shallow ones, but we have to dress better for them?

    I find myself disagreeing with Watcher to some extent though; I find that acting as though you own the place you\'re in helps a lot. People seem to read that as confidence. Of course, I also have a very suspicious mind, so I\'m always watching for games. For example, the next time that girl bites me, it had best be a part of something much more fun to come! [img]/ubbthreads/images/icons/smile.gif[/img]

  29. #29
    Phero Dude
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    Default Re: Lots of articles on how good guys winning but.

    was at the fast seduction site and there was a link there to this article on \"nice guys\" (written by some female I guess) at the \"Heartless Bitches\" website (yup - that\'s what they call their website!!). I think any guy who perceives themselves as a nice guy needs to read this as it gives great insight to how women generally perceive guys like this and confirms in my mind why you can\'t win at this game if you are \"nice\" as it will be perceived as \"weakness\" by most, so the only way to go is to be alpha and always be congruent to that at all times. Anyway the link is below if anyone wants to read:

    http://www.heartless-bitches.com/rants/niceguys/niceguys.shtml

  30. #30
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    Default Re: Lots of articles on how good guys winning but.

    haha yea sad but true
    a lot of nice guys think the more caring and love they show to a girl she\'ll fall in love with him or something because he really will do everything for her...but that\'s the movies
    i feel bad for the nice guys though, so i\'ve made it my hobby to help em get the right attitude cuz i used to be a nice guy myself

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