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  1. #1
    Stranger TheAttractor's Avatar
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    Post Forum Story about Pheromones (limit 5 sentences per post)

    visit-red-300x50PNG
    After seeing the three-word story, it inspired me to start this one. Let's all write a

    story where the characters use pheromones from this site, and different events unfold as a result. Here are the

    guidelines, similar to the three-word thread.

    1. Anyone can contribute.
    2. There is a limit of five (5)

    sentences per post, with the exception of the first one, where ground rules and the story is laid out.
    3. Posts

    need to have good grammar, spelling, and punctuation (doesn't have to read like a college paper, but can't be like

    MySpace either), and sentences must be a reasonable length.
    4. The same person is NOT allowed to make two

    consecutive posts in a row.
    5. The post being added must have some semblance of a coherent flow with the story in

    the most recent post.
    6. Keep it up for as long as your creativity allows.

    And, without further ado, on with the

    story.



    It was a dark and hectic night. Four men were sitting around a house, playing cards. Suddenly,

    lights went out, and there was a loud scream outside. When the lights came back on, one man ran to the front door

    to check things out. He saw a woman lying on the front step and fearfully touching her neck with her fingers. There

    was a long trail of footprints on the snow, extending from the front step to the forest past the yard. It appeared

    to go farther into the forest, but actually ended at the property line.

  2. #2
    Moderator idesign's Avatar
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    Judging from the woman's DIHL

    and the yellow steam rising from the snowy footsteps, she was obviously the victim of a vicious NPA assault. Even

    Joey No-Nostrils - so named because doctors had sewn his nostrils shut after failing cocaine treatment - was not

    oblivious to the acrid sharpness hovering in the air. "Lets look around" said one of the guys, obviously a

    go-getter. "Good idea" said another, who was always sucking up to the first guy.

    Just then they all suddenly and

    simultaneously noticed
    Last edited by idesign; 11-05-2009 at 06:03 AM. Reason: Reread the rules... oops


  3. #3
    Phero Guru Rbt's Avatar
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    her BMW parked nearby, door

    ajar,
    her USB flash drive on the ground beside her,
    her "L-S Rocks!" pin glistening in her lapel,
    her DKNY

    sweater wet with sweat (or was it something else?),
    and her AMA membership card clutched in her hand





    (okay I made it 5 lines not sentences... but it's neen a long day)
    The opposite of love isn't hate.
    It's apathy
    .

  4. #4
    Stranger TheAttractor's Avatar
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    Igancio, the man who went

    outside first, leaned over the woman and said: "I'm certified to give first aid. Now, what's the last thing you

    remember happening?" The woman didn't answer him, just gazed with a strange combination of disorientation and lust

    in her eyes. "It's NPA, all right", Ignacio mumbled. Then he turn to Karl (the go-getter), and blurted out: "go

    check the car!"

  5. #5
    Phero Guru Rbt's Avatar
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    Karl cautiously approached the BMW,

    noting, again, that the passenger side door, which was facing him, was slightly ajar.

    What struck him as odd

    was there were no footprints around the car anywhere that he could see.

    Could it be that there was someone

    still inside?

    Glancing toward the rear of the vehicle, Karl could see fresh tire tracks, but they seemed to

    mysteriously fade away rather quickly, almost as if the car was dropped and it rolled forward to where it now sat.



    Suddenly Karl stopped in his tracks, startled by an odd scratching noise that seemed to be eminating from the rear

    of the car...
    The opposite of love isn't hate.
    It's apathy
    .

  6. #6
    Stranger TheAttractor's Avatar
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    While Karl was fiddling

    around with the car, Joey went to investigate the footprints. They formed a clean, straight line from the front

    step and just stopped right where the yard ended and a dense forest began. "Whoever hurt that woman must have run

    off into the forest", Joey thought, "but why aren't there any footprints there?" He looked up, and saw that some

    of the trees didn't have as much snow on them as the rest. Suddenly, he heard Karl yell: "hey Joey, get a load of

    this!"
    Last edited by TheAttractor; 11-05-2009 at 07:44 PM.

  7. #7
    Moderator idesign's Avatar
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    Joey turned, and just as he was

    about to run over to Karl a giant hook grabbed his waistband from behind and lifted him into the air like a huge

    mechanical wedgie. As he was being dragged up the side of a tree he wheezed "Hwweerrllp!" All eyes were on Joey as

    he was swung around at the end of an unseen tether and plopped down on top of Karl like a pork belly on a slow

    trader just before the bell.

    "Well, that explains how the car got here, sort of" said Karl, "thanks for coming

    so fast". "Not at all" puffed Joey, who was holding himself in a non-sexual way for the first time, ever.


  8. #8
    Phero Guru Rbt's Avatar
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    Ignacio, who had been busily tending

    to the strange woman and hadn't been aware of the sudden turn of events looked up to see Joey and Karl heaped in a

    pile near the BMW.

    "Hey! you guys," he barked, quit gettin jiggy! There's time for that later!"

    As Karl and

    Joey began to untangle themselves from each other, while keeping out a wary eye for that unexpected hook, Ignacio

    returned to checking the condition of the unknown woman.

    As he looked over the DNKY sweater, he suddenly

    realized that he couldn't see any clothes on the lower part of her body... he hesitated, but in the interest of

    making certain of her condition, decided to slowly, carefully, and cautiously, lift the bottom of the wet sweater

    and peered underneath.

    "Holy Cow!" he exclained, "Hello Kitty panties!"
    The opposite of love isn't hate.
    It's apathy
    .

  9. #9
    Stranger TheAttractor's Avatar
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    But then Ignacio realized

    that the task at hand was to find out what happened to the woman. He called Tom (the guy who sucked up) and said:

    "Can you bring me some A1 and SOE from storage; those will make her more willing to talk to us." When Tom came back

    with the pheromones, Ignacio sprayed them toward the woman's face. She coughed a little, and blinked rapidly.

    "What's your name, and what's the last thing you remember happening to you?", the men asked her.

    (side comment:

    this story is turning out pretty nicely so far, let's keep it going)

  10. #10
    Moderator idesign's Avatar
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    [blink blink blink] "Well,

    there was this guy, you know, and like, he was like just this guy. Soooo I thought he was kinda cute so I talked to

    him and he was like pretty cool and I gave him my number and he called me like 5 minutes later and then we met coz I

    was like at the next table and then we texted each other some really hot, like, you know, conversation and I was

    getting rilly hot but like this guy was a stranguurr, you know? Then he said something like "you wanna get down at

    the end of a big crane?" and I was like sooooo wanting something bigger than my last b/f and followed him out to his

    equipment, at least that's what he called this thing. To me it looked like a big truck with a thingy on top, but

    he promised that I would be happy forever if I just climbed in and smelled his neck, so I did"


  11. #11
    Stranger TheAttractor's Avatar
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    The woman continued,

    rambling in the process: "Well, he convinced me to get into his truck-looking vehicle, it smelled like sandalwood

    inside, so good, you know. He started telling me about this club called Pharaoh Moan, he said 'it's filled with

    aromas that makes you feel divine'; maybe it's got contraptions that pump scents into the air. Then he put his

    arm around me, and pressed me against him, so my nose rested against his neck, then I felt a convulsion of some

    sort, and everything went black, and next thing I knew, I'm here talking to you guys." "Wow!", Ignacio answered,

    he was speechless. Then he asked Tom to keep an eye on the woman, and ran outside to speak to Joey, who heard about

    Pharaoh Moan from other people while undergoing drug rehabilitation.

  12. #12
    Moderator idesign's Avatar
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    Freshly stitched and very

    uncomfortable, Joey made a beeline to club Pharaoh Moan the very day he was released from treatment with the worst

    grade ever recorded at that particular facility. The fact that he narrowly escaped sexual harassment charges while

    a resident there can probably be attributed to his well connected family who, despite their judicial pull, were

    unable to prevent Joey's olfactory closure. Indeed, according to one unnamed source, the presiding judge was heard

    to say privately in chambers that he'd personally "sew that pervert's pecker to his belly button if I wasn't up

    for re-election".

    Joey had placed himself locally in a special class of individuals who, with good reason, were

    best viewed from afar. Providence placed him at the bar of the Pharoah Moan club beside the secretive yet

    gregarious crane owner/operator W.T.Fuch.


  13. #13
    Moderator idesign's Avatar
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    well storytellers?


  14. #14
    Moderator idesign's Avatar
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    After a half dozen tequila lime

    freezes, along with breathing a steady atmosphere of Chikara being pumped from well placed atomizers, Joey hooted

    like a deranged owl when he read his new friend's business card; "Need some Big Equipment? Call me, WTF."

    On

    the night of the accident he fleetingly made a mental connection as he was being hoisted into the air, just as

    Ignacio fleetingly remembered the pair of Hello Kitty panties missing from his collection. Karl (spelled with a K)

    was not making any connections at all but was damned determined to get to the bottom of this. Tom, ever the helpful

    soul, came out of the house with brandy and a thermos of coffee.


  15. #15
    Moderator idesign's Avatar
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    Karl (spelled with a K)

    untangled himself from Joey at the back of the BMW, thinking "I have no time for this", even though his private

    entanglements with Joey he had found quite satisfactory. Tom poured him a brandy and asked "what's up with

    Ignacio?". Karl (spelled with a K) looked over and observed Ignatio observing the woman's crotch at close range,

    his face a resemblance to the "Soul's Awakening". Joey, observing Ignatio, then observing Karl observing Ignatio,

    scurried to hide under the rear of the car just where the scratching noise was emanating.
    Last edited by idesign; 05-02-2010 at 06:11 PM.


  16. #16
    Moderator idesign's Avatar
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    "O what a tangled web we weave,

    when first we practice to deceive" or, in Joey's case, outright theft. Poker night at Ignatio's was a special

    treat for Joey, not for for the game or comraderie with similarly dysfunctional members of the community, but for

    the long bathroom breaks during which he would sneak into the bedroom and rifle Ignatio's panty collection. The

    "Hello Kitty" caper, weeks before, was not planned, but rather a reaction to a noise at the bedroom door after which

    the panties made a beeline from Joey's nose to his pocket in under a second.

    Later that night, in the mellow

    glow of sublime afterburn, he had told a woman (who's name escaped him, like so many names) that he had bought them

    for her in the hope that it would display his true feelings for her, which she could not quite process after

    breathing half a dozen pheromones in half that many hours.

    His hands around the tailpipe (of the BMW), Joey

    pondered these things, and pondered the atomizer which he had installed in the woman's car which was making that

    awful scratching sound, and was wondering how he would extricate himself from the impending fury which was sure to

    follow.


  17. #17
    Moderator idesign's Avatar
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    If fate is the playground of the

    gods, then Joey must certainly be one of their favorite toys. Joey was thinking this, though in not such

    philosophical terms, as his thoughts usually ran along the lines of self preservation. Not only had he stolen

    Ignatio's panties, but he'd given them to Tom's new girlfriend who, in fit of NPA induced wanton behavior, agreed

    to a private game of ring toss after a particularly fun night at the PM club.

    Tom, who until now was focused upon

    making the strange evening more pleasant for everyone, had not yet observed the crime scene in any detail, or the

    woman who's splayed legs were being manipulated by Ignatio in the hope that a definitive identification of her

    panties could be made.

    Karl (yes yes yes, K) began to fume, Joey wept as his fist had no effect on the atomizer,

    and Tom, finally, began to absorb the unique qualities of the scene.


  18. #18
    Moderator idesign's Avatar
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    In any group of friends -

    particularly such as we find here - there is an anchor; a member who's personal qualities are less likely to raise

    the hair on the back of necks and who provide social legitimacy at critical moments, such as when entering a bar.

    Tom, the very last of the Truly Nice Guys, starred in this role with Biblical patience but not (we should hasten to

    add) without a somewhat guilty eye toward the social ladder upon who's bottom rung he clung with increasing

    weariness.

    Having drawn too late the bead on Joey, Ignacio and Karl, he maintained his presence in the group with

    a hair trigger on his better sensibilities, and had placed no small amount of hope on a woman he met the PM

    club.

    Different from the other girls he had met there, she exuded a soft sensuality that spoke in the warm tones

    of cozy weekends tucked in a cabin far away from the PherHotel, that tawdry excrescence directly adjacent to the PM

    club, where hormone-crazed "Moners" gathered after hours to practice their art.

    As the full scene of the evening

    exploded suddenly in his brain, he uncorked the bottle of Cognac and pulled hard on its magical properties.


  19. #19
    Moderator idesign's Avatar
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    Francine's unique manipulation

    of the English language notwithstanding, she was a girl who understood many things, mostly on an intuitive level,

    and was known to have the capability to put men on notice if her lines were crossed. But her heart was intact, and

    those who invested the time necessary to cross the divide were rewarded with many times the dues paid to enter her

    world, where peace reigned overall and sensual bliss was but the work of a free afternoon, or morning, or lunch

    break in the Lingerie fitting room at Nordstrom's where Tom worked. They were an imaginative pair, and costume

    changes only heightened Tom's awareness that all things worthwhile came wrapped in red.


  20. #20
    Moderator idesign's Avatar
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    A life of privilege and

    prettiness did not prepare Francine for the soft emotions she felt toward Tom, nor the emotional maturity to deal

    with a flood of pheromones entering her brain via Joey's Auto-Atomizer II, nor the industrial pumps at the PM Club

    which fed its guests with a pheromonal atmosphere which a politician would call either criminal or divine, depending

    on who was in the room. And to say that Francine was unprepared to deal with the likes of Joey is like saying a

    Marineland blonde is unprepared to be eaten by a Killer Whale. The odds are against it, but eventually its going to

    happen; nature has its rules.

    Tom had lit upon a lovely and meaningful aspect of his future life while Joey

    calculated the optimum use of "Hello Kitty" panties.


  21. #21
    Moderator idesign's Avatar
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    Joey finally succeeded in

    ripping the Auto-Atomizer II from Francine's car just as Karl (K), in a barely controlled fit of organizational

    angst, pulled him by the ankles from beneath the car, atomizer and all. Karl's limited mental capacity, coupled

    with his failing grade in "Survey of Phero-Technical Apparatus" and his complete incoherence of Joey's radical

    social model, rendered him speechless.

    Also speechless were Tom and Ignacio, but for different reasons.



    Tom, hoping beyond the possibility of hope that the woman laying prostrate on the pavement was any other than

    his beloved Francine, staggered toward her as he drank steadily from France's best effort toward peace in the

    world.

    Losing his now apprehensive balance, Tom bumped Ignacio from the rear, causing Ignacio to plant his face

    directly onto the waiting, and still somewhat wanting, mouth of Hello Kitty.


  22. #22
    Moderator idesign's Avatar
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    Karl is not the type of person

    to remain speechless for any length of time and, as with most people who are prematurely and punitively toilet

    trained, succumbs easily to aggression when faced with confusing events. Karl did remain speechless precisely long

    enough to kick Joey violently as a matter of course.

    Joey, not unused to violence upon himself winced, curled

    and cradled the Auto-Atomizer II as it continued to scratch and spew its clever mix of attractants into the local

    atmosphere, its largest exhaust tube pointing in the direction of Francine, Tom and Ignacio.

    After tripping

    over Ignacio, Tom fell onto the pavement directly beside Francine just as she gasped at Ignacio's unintentional

    "Kitty" dive. While gasping, she breathed an uncontrolled dose of Joey's mix which pumped steadily toward her then

    grabbed the bottle of Cognac from Tom's trembling hands. The upturned bottle at her lips and her eyes rolled back

    into her head, she wrapped her legs around Ignacio's head and groped Tom with her only free hand.


  23. #23
    Moderator idesign's Avatar
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    In the course of human development there are times at which, usually in retrospect, one can pinpoint precisely when a corner is turned and life presents itself afresh, through a different lens as it were, and old thoughts become the flotsam and jetsam of a new awareness. Tom was now - not unpleasantly - experiencing one of those rare moments when he understood both the immediate pleasure of Francine's liberality and the impact that its public nature may have on his future sexual life, and he was not unhappy.

    Joey, always one to appreciate a free exhibition, held his gaze on the scene in his peculiarly pornographic way as Karl, succumbing to years of confused sexual repression leaped upon the mixture of Tom, Ignacio and Francine, not caring who he landed upon.

    The police arrived at a quarter to five, and immediately drew the reigns on this runaway stagecoach as WT Fuchs laughed hysterically from the cab of his new WTF-5 model crane, vowing that pheromones is his life, and the heavy lifting is yet to be done.


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