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  1. #1
    Moderator belgareth's Avatar
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    Default Things I learned living in Texas

    visit-red-300x50PNG
    1. A possum is a flat animal that sleeps in the middle of the road.



    2. There are 5,000 types of snakes and 4,998 of them live in

    Texas.


    3. There are 10,000 types of

    spiders. All 10,000 of them live in Texas, plus a couple no one's seen

    before.


    4. If it grows, it'll stick

    ya. If it crawls, it'll bite cha.




    5. 'Onced' and 'Twiced' are

    words.


    6. It is not a shopping cart,

    it is a buggy.


    7. 'Jaw-P?' means

    'Did ya'll go to the bathroom?'




    8. People actually grow and eat

    okra.


    9. 'fixinto' is one

    word.


    10. There is no such thing as

    'lunch'. There is only dinner and then there is supper.




    11. Iced tea is appropriate for all meals and you start drinking it when you're two. We do

    like a little tea with our sugar.




    12. Backwards and forwards means 'I know everything about

    you.'


    13. The word 'jeet' is

    actually a phrase meaning 'Did you eat?'.




    14. You don't have to wear a watch, because it doesn't matter what time it is, you work

    until you're done or it's too dark to see.




    15. You don't PUSH buttons, you MASH

    EM.




    16. 'No. Jew?' is a common response to the question

    'Did you bring any beer?'.


    17. You

    measure distance in minutes.


    18. You

    switch from heat to A/C in the same day.




    19. All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable, grain, insect or

    animal.


    20. You know what a 'DAWG'

    is.


    21. You carry jumper cables in

    your car --- for your OWN car.


    22.

    You only own five spices: salt, pepper, Head Country, Tabasco and

    Ketchup.


    23. The local papers cover

    national and international news on one page, but require 6 pages for local gossip and

    motorsports.


    24. You think that the

    first day of deer season is a national holiday.




    25. You find 100 degrees Fahrenheit 'a bit

    warm'.


    26. You know all four

    seasons: Almost summer, summer, still summer, and Christmas.




    27... Going to Wal-Mart is a favorite past time know as 'goin' Wal-Martin' or 'off to

    Wally World'


    28. You describe the

    first cool snap (below 70 degrees) as good chili weather.




    29. Fried catfish is the other white

    meat.


    30. We don't need no dang

    driver's ed. If our mama says we can drive then we can...besides that, we've been driving since the age of

    8.


    31. You understand these jokes and forward them to your Texas friends

    and those who just wish they were from Texas
    To compel a man to subsidize with his taxes the propagation of ideas which he disbelieves and abhors is sinful and tyrannical.

    Thomas Jefferson

  2. #2
    Phero Guru
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    Default none

    I like Okra. When I lived

    in Texas distance was measured in beers drunk, "how far to the beach daddy? Only 3 more beers kids"

    The good

    ole days.
    There is a cure for electile dysfuntion!!!!

  3. #3
    Moderator idesign's Avatar
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    Default

    In East Carolina...

    All

    festivals are named after seafood.

    Two pickup trucks stopped on a two lane road next next to each other...

    "Carolina Telephone".

    If your employees don't show up for work either the surf's up or the Trout are

    runnin'.

    You "cut off the lights"

    A long distance is a "fer piece".

    If its tourist season, why can't you

    shoot them?

    The tide got so high the sharks et the collards.

    And of course BBQ is chopped pork from an open

    spit with a vinegar based sauce. There's only one thing hotter and sweeter, or vice versa if you make the wrong

    choice in a woman.


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