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  1. #1
    Phero Enthusiast tenaciousBLADE's Avatar
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    Exclamation Alpha male - what does that mean to you gals?

    visit-red-300x50PNG
    I think the title says it all
    Please girls, women... Share your views.
    Say it all in my

    face... tell me the most honnest views you have on the term Alpha Male & its' meaning(s).

    I'm sure this should

    be a great discussion theme. Both women & man alike would have great interest in this matter.

    So please... share

    share share



    ------------------------------
    Edit Add:
    I just read

    this thread, where the issue of an Alpha-Male

    defenition came to be discussed. There aren't many answers\points of view there, but I thought it could be a nice

    reference.
    Anyhow, the question isn't really answered there... So I still implore you gals to share your own

    opinions

    BTW, belgareth... this may be off topic, but if you're reading this... I've just added something

    you said there, into my favorite quotes
    Here it is:
    You may notice I rarely presume to give

    advice [...] other than recomending a reasonable method of testing [...] or clearly stipulating that this applies to

    me only. The same even applies to fields I am considered an expert in, it helps me keep my

    big foot out of my big mouth.
    Last edited by tenaciousBLADE; 12-11-2006 at 10:48 PM. Reason: Added the link

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    Phero Dude slickracer's Avatar
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    one thing i have come to

    realized with this is that, women finds a 'MAN' that knows what what his 'role' in life is, attractive. if you

    have to be told what a 'man' should do, then you are not worthy enough to be one in thier eyes.

    i feel bad for

    the boys that are being raised by single mothers. but if the father isn't going to be a 'father' then i guess its

    best they don't learn form them. i guess everything has to balance out.

    i'll give you alittle hint that i have

    stumbled upon. check out other animals, after all we are just another animal on this planet, with a different system

    and prespective.

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    Phero Enthusiast tenaciousBLADE's Avatar
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    I was a pus once... my

    father was once upon a time a friend, but never a `father` (we're ok now though)...
    But I learned by myself & with

    the help of my best friend, who's a real alpha. He says I'm better than him sometimes... but I don't take it too

    much to my ego

    Anyhow, I'm just wondering about the women's opinions & points of view...
    I don't need to

    be told how to be a men. But it always helps to know the other sides' point of view

    I personaly agree

    somewhat with the "I know my role" man usualy being an alpha.
    But the question remains: What are the women

    saying about it?

  4. #4
    Kodachrome Forever! Gegogi's Avatar
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    Not too many women 'round these

    parts for some time now. A few boy's club yee-ha types ran them off.

    Rather trying to be a man, alpha or

    whatever--that's easy--I focus on being the best at what I do.
    "I'm just a dirty hornytoad" -Gegogi

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    Quote Originally Posted by Gegogi
    Not too many women

    'round these parts for some time now. A few boy's club yee-ha types ran them off.





    This is a load of crap. Nobody ran anybody off of here. People come and go on their own accord.

    And why don't you post some examples, if you are going to keep throwing out this charge.

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    Kodachrome Forever! Gegogi's Avatar
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    Basically a small core of

    guys--most of which are now banned--created a female hostile environment, especially with the David D. and I'm

    entitled to female attention because I'm a needy man talk. Many discussions degenerated into a boy's lockerroom

    with little or no concern for the views of the females involved. I was offended and ashamed of their obvious lack of

    perspective on human relationships. And Tounge, if your tone of pen here is any indication of style, you could have

    easily offended someone. If you disagree, it is more civil to simply write, "I disagree because of such and such"

    rather hurl doodoo (e.g., a pallet-board of feces). Yes, people do come and go on their own accord. Nevertheless,

    they often the choice to leave for a good reason. In fairless, I haven't seen it much since all the banning and

    fleeing a year or so ago.
    "I'm just a dirty hornytoad" -Gegogi

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    Moderator belgareth's Avatar
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    Now that we've had a chance to

    vent, can we please go back to the topic?
    To compel a man to subsidize with his taxes the propagation of ideas which he disbelieves and abhors is sinful and tyrannical.

    Thomas Jefferson

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    Phero Enthusiast tenaciousBLADE's Avatar
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    thanks belgareth

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    Red face

    Quote Originally Posted by slickracer
    i feel bad for the

    boys that are being raised by single mothers. but if the father isn't going to be a 'father' then i guess its

    best they don't learn form them. i guess everything has to balance out.
    slightly O/T but here

    it is anyway...

    As a divorced father of two boys 12 & 13, this is exactly the reason why I've moved across

    the country to a new city. To be with my kids.
    My father was never around and I"m not close to him at all, I

    don't want my boys growing up without me wondering who I am... I just don't understand men that bugger off and

    start a new marriage elsewhere leaving their children behind, never to see them except for the odd holiday. shame on

    them for being so selfish.
    OK.
    rant over, this is a subject that gets me hopping mad.
    early 40's white male or or

  10. #10
    Moderator belgareth's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by gaf
    I just don't

    understand men that bugger off and start a new marriage elsewhere leaving their children behind, never to see them

    except for the odd holiday. shame on them for being so selfish.
    OK.
    rant over, this is a subject that gets me

    hopping mad.
    Same here. My ex wife is the one that took off and left me with a daughter

    to raise. Although, I can't say my daughter is any the worse for it.
    To compel a man to subsidize with his taxes the propagation of ideas which he disbelieves and abhors is sinful and tyrannical.

    Thomas Jefferson

  11. #11
    Phero Enthusiast tenaciousBLADE's Avatar
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    Unhappy Many true Alphas are gona end up being role-model fathers

    Quote Originally Posted by gaf
    slightly O/T but here it is anyway...

    As a divorced father of two

    boys 12 & 13, this is exactly the reason why I've moved across the country to a new city. To be with my kids.
    My

    father was never around and I"m not close to him at all, I don't want my boys growing up without me wondering who I

    am... I just don't understand men that bugger off and start a new marriage elsewhere leaving their children behind,

    never to see them except for the odd holiday. shame on them for being so selfish.
    OK.
    rant over, this is a subject

    that gets me hopping mad.
    Wow... harsh one
    I can't help but feel bad for those

    children.

    Get's me thinking though - those are NOT alpha-males in my book. I have an ex-g/f whos father &

    mother got divorsed (mine are too, but that's not the point). Her father got remaried, but didn't stop being a

    friend to the mother & even supports her financially as much as he can (he's lucky to be the best in his field or

    one of the three; so he's got the money to help).
    Now her mother got cancer, and if the father wouldn't be in

    such good relations (relatively that is) with the mother... then I presume that my ex would have it much tougher on

    her.

    So is he an alpha male?
    I'm not yet sure.
    I know my own defenition - but it's a very demanding

    one. I'm an alpha in a few fields, but in others I guess I have so much to work on :\
    You know how it is...



    As I see it, spreading the genes is not enough. You gotta make sure the children are brought up the right way

    & end up being better than you... The genes are NOT the only factor in survival.

    Anyway back to the subject - So

    we get that going with the "I'm gonna spread my genes & have as many families as possible, without having the care

    of being the father charecter" is not necessarily the Alpha-Males' approach.
    In my book it's not even close.
    But

    what is then? (Specially in a womans' point of view)

  12. #12
    Kodachrome Forever! Gegogi's Avatar
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    Well, I'm not a "gal" (maybe a

    girlie man!). But here's my take on it:

    For humans, alpha male does not mean exactly the same thing as it

    does in a wolf pack, nor is it the same thing as it was during prehistoric times. However, like a wold pack, a human

    alpha male is a leader, err, the top dog. To be top dog requires an intelligent, confident, and successful male with

    unusually strong leadership qualities. A guy that really stands out from the crowd. A promiscuous, chest beating

    moron is not an alpha male (that's a dickhead loser). A badboy is not an alpha male (the guy getting arrested on

    "Cops"). A punk in a nightclub bedding dumb bimbos is not an alpha male (future AIDs patent and car saleman). A

    typical alpha male is a high ranking business executive or politician. Think Steve Jobs, Trump or Bill

    Clinton.

    I believe you can teach leadership skills to some extent. Nevertheless, most of us don't really

    have what it takes to be a great leader among men. I suspect some magical combination of genes and environment an

    alpha makes. That doesn't mean there isn't a little alpha in most guys. You can be the leader of a tiny

    domain--your rock band, sports team or small business. However takes a lot more to rise to the level of a truly

    great leader in our society and a full on alpha male.
    "I'm just a dirty hornytoad" -Gegogi

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    Phero Enthusiast tenaciousBLADE's Avatar
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    Well, I'm not a

    "gal" (maybe a girlie man!).
    Actually, this thread was originally posted at the women's forum. I guess the

    moderators moved it

    Anyhow, more suggestions\opinions anyone?

  14. #14
    Full Member Mungojerry's Avatar
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    xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
    Last edited by Mungojerry; 10-05-2015 at 08:27 AM.

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    Thumbs up

    Quote Originally Posted by Gegogi
    To be top dog requires

    an intelligent, confident, and successful male with unusually strong leadership qualities. A guy that really stands

    out from the crowd. A promiscuous, chest beating moron is not an alpha male (that's a dickhead loser). A badboy is

    not an alpha male (the guy getting arrested on "Cops"). A punk in a nightclub bedding dumb bimbos is not an alpha

    male (future AIDs patent and car saleman). A typical alpha male is a high ranking business executive or politician.

    Think Steve Jobs, Trump or Bill Clinton.

    I was going to reply "on topic" but i think this quote

    from Gegogi sums up in far better words then I could come up with my take on it all. (sometimes I wish I had a more

    academic brain , rather then a practical one) Pity that too many men belive in his examples of what it ain't,

    rather then what it is...
    early 40's white male or or

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    Phero Enthusiast tenaciousBLADE's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mungojerry
    A man

    who can control others if he choses, but cannot himself be controlled by anyone else, no matter how much

    manipulation is thrown at him.
    I like this defenition
    I wouldn't call it a full defenition, but I like

    it a lot

  17. #17
    Full Member Mungojerry's Avatar
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    fffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffff
    Last edited by Mungojerry; 10-05-2015 at 08:26 AM.

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    Kodachrome Forever! Gegogi's Avatar
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    The trouble is, it also describes

    the "Lone Wolf." Many lone wolf types could be, or once were, true alphas, that is, leaders among their kind. The

    lone wolf thing tends to come with age and fading energy, disillusionment, drinking/drug problems (it's stressful

    to be a leader) or poor communication skills.

    Of course not every man can or should be an alpha. Otherwise

    our society would be in even worse disarray with only Chiefs and no dad burn Indians!

    I've noticed in

    student lead group projects, a dormant or immature alpha male or female will quickly seize the reins and begin

    controlling the group. Those with leadership qualities are immediately apparent. Something I end up with 2 in a

    group and they butt heads endlessly. Occasionally there are no alpha personalities and the group fails utterly. The

    odd thing is the alpha personality types are usually no more knowledgeable or experienced than the other students.

    It's not uncommon for them to lead the other students off a cliff! They simply have the charisma and skills to

    organize and direct the other students. Also, the alpha personality is just as likely to be male or

    female.

    My final observation is the alpha females are usually the most commanding and demanding in their

    leadership. They take no prisoners! The guys tend to be more gentle and easy going.
    "I'm just a dirty hornytoad" -Gegogi

  19. #19
    Full Member Mungojerry's Avatar
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    wwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
    Last edited by Mungojerry; 10-05-2015 at 08:24 AM.

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    Phero Dude Marlboro_man's Avatar
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    The alpha male approach I

    shoot for is:

    That guy that's out in a social setting such as a bar. People walk in make sure they say hi to

    him. People always ask his advice. He tends to be the surrounded by alot of people all the time who value him and

    respect him. He is honest, true, respectable and sincere.
    An Alpha male is a guy who leads by example, has lots

    of friends. is well respected and someone who enjoys life. After all this is the kind of person we all want to be

    around right?

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    My definition of an alpha male

    is a man who makes no attempts to pretend to be anything other than what he is and simply doesn't give a damn about

    other people's pre-conceptions. An alpha male is a trend setter, not a follower, someone who takes the initiative

    not someone who waits. Whether he's a lone wolf or a natural leader, it makes no difference. Some fine examples

    would be George Clooney, Brad Pitt's character in Fight Club and Daniel Craig's version of James Bond.

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    Phero Enthusiast tenaciousBLADE's Avatar
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    Talking Wow... many replies lol

    well, let's see...
    I feel it at least covers ground that definitely is within the concept of

    alpha male, even if it doesn't flesh out the concept to the boundaries.
    Mungojerry,
    I feel there might

    be some exeptional spesific insidents where this defenition is applied, yet the man remains a non-alpha... like when

    someone is in such rage that no one can control him (i.e. he is mad to the bad side).
    An example of such a case

    could be, as Gegogi mentioned, a "Lone Wolf" gone bad with time.. or with anger... or whatever else can make a man

    rot... : \
    Now, I know you said
    Even so, if you are a lone wolf, but are still beyond the

    control or others, but can control others yourself [e.g. make decisions others follow, or stir up emotions in others

    minds] then i'd still say you were pretty alpha. Or at least someone whom i'd still aspire to be on those

    dimensions
    I disagree. An Alpha should also know what orders to give. Morality & such DO

    play a part here. A lone wolf that can do as you said, might also give an order to kill 400 people; an order which

    the other person would take fully (as we mentioned he can, if he chooses, control others). That WOULDN'T be an

    Alpha male's order, yet that lone wolf might give it.

    But, I do generally agree to what you said, as they

    say there's an exeption to every rule
    The only thing I have to add to your defenition then, is that he should

    also know how to control himself (and always do it).


    "Now I know what an alpha male is, how do

    I become one?"

    Now, in my opinion, that is far more productive question!

    Damn... you are so right LOL
    I suggest you start a thread on this question... lead people to this

    thread in the first post for ideas, and then ask them your question... I'd be delighted to read the results...

    wow... you struck a pot of gold there...


    Gegogi, your post was interesting... not just the lone wolf part,

    but mostly the student observation

    Now, about this:
    If you can keep your head

    when all about you

    Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
    If you can trust yourself when all men

    doubt you,

    But make allowance for their doubting too:
    If you can wait and not be tired by

    waiting,

    Or, being lied about, don't deal in lies,
    Or being hated don't give way to

    hating,

    And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise;

    If you can dream -- and not make dreams

    your master;

    If you can think -- and not make thoughts your aim,
    If you can meet with Triumph and

    Disaster

    And treat those two impostors just the same:
    If you can bear to hear the truth you've

    spoken

    Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
    Or watch the things you gave your life to,

    broken,

    And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools;

    If you can make one heap of all your

    winnings

    And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
    And lose, and start again at your

    beginnings,

    And never breathe a word about your loss:
    If you can force your heart and nerve and

    sinew

    To serve your turn long after they are gone,
    And so hold on when there is nothing in

    you

    Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on!"

    If you can talk with crowds and keep your

    virtue,

    Or walk with Kings -- nor lose the common touch,
    If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt

    you,

    If all men count with you, but none too much:
    If you can fill the unforgiving

    minute

    With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
    Yours is the Earth and everything that's in

    it,

    And -- which is more -- you'll be a Man, my son!
    Wow... wow, WOW,

    WOAW!!!

    It's so good it makes me wanna curse into the air while putting on a smile that

    can never let go.

    Wow/
    CptKipling... if you're reding this...

    It gave me the chills

    Mungojerry, where is this from? can you link the post please?




    The alpha male approach I shoot for is:

    That guy that's out in a social setting

    such as a bar. People walk in make sure they say hi to him. People always ask his advice. He tends to be the

    surrounded by alot of people all the time who value him and respect him. He is honest, true, respectable and

    sincere.
    An Alpha male is a guy who leads by example, has lots of friends. is well respected and someone who

    enjoys life. After all this is the kind of person we all want to be around right?
    malboro_man, I see your

    view & agree. Yet those were mostly the affects of him being an Alpha, and not the qualities that make him

    one.
    Think you can rephrase\elaborate?

    My definition of an alpha male is a man who makes no attempts

    to pretend to be anything other than what he is and simply doesn't give a damn about other people's

    pre-conceptions. An alpha male is a trend setter, not a follower, someone who takes the

    initiative not someone who waits.
    d3kst3r, Very interesting. I think, again, this is a partial defenition.

    Don't get me wrong here, I myself have also no full defenition. And I like this one a lot



    I'll edit this post later for grammer & mainor corrections, but my time is up

    Everybody, good posts...

    please keep on giving your opinions. They give us all a wider range of view reguarding what an Alpha-Male is (or

    female, gegogi... I defenetly agree there is such a thing and hope it's common ).

    ciao...

  23. #23
    Full Member Mungojerry's Avatar
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    Last edited by Mungojerry; 10-05-2015 at 08:25 AM.

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    Phero Dude Marlboro_man's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by tenaciousBLADE

    malboro_man, I see your view & agree. Yet those were mostly the affects of him being an

    Alpha, and not the qualities that make him one.
    Think you can rephrase\elaborate?
    Well I will list

    some qualities that cause such but it's fair to say that these will change depending on location and culture. I

    don't believe an alpha male here will instantly be an alpha somewhere else until he EARNS it.
    Some qualities:


    Honest
    : obviously needeed
    Sincere: to earn the respect of others they must know you care.


    Caring
    : Goes hand and hand with being sincere.
    Unique: Someone who people feel they have to get to

    know because they instantly can tell your different.
    Independent: Not afraid to travel or do alone. It

    amazes me how many people I know that won't got to dinner or a mall by themselves.
    Individual: Combines

    alot of previous stated things but I am using it to refer to style. You appear how you want to and if you believe

    in it others will like it to.
    Confident: If I need to explain this one to ya the rest is way too

    complicated.
    Leader: ahh a tricky one. A true alpha male will sit back and allow someone their moment of

    glory and then take back over the leadership rule as soon as they are done. IMO 1 of the biggest failures of most

    people trying to be Alpha.

    Those are some of the qualities that I have seen in alpha males. My word to the wise,

    IF you aren't already alpha or close to it then be prepared. You will often be challenged and how you handle it

    will confirm or deny your status just like in a wolf pack. NO this does not need to involve a fist fight although

    some others may try to take that path with you!

  25. #25
    Kodachrome Forever! Gegogi's Avatar
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    Here's the Wikipedia

    definition:

    In social animals, the alpha male or alpha female is the individual in the community whom

    the others follow and defer to. Where one male and one female fulfill this role, they are referred to as the alpha

    pair.

    In humans, the alpha male often refers to a man who is powerful or high on the social ladder, similar

    to hegemonic masculinity. In Western cultures, the term is sometimes pejorative and describes a man who is overly

    masculine and should be feared. The term Omega male (?-male) is an antonym often used in a deprecating or self

    deprecating manner to refer to males at the bottom of the social hierarchy.
    I think many of you are

    listing desirable qualifications of a good man, e.g., moral character and other aspects of personality that make him

    a great guy. However, an alpha male is simply a leader, a top dog, a fat cat, the all rich 'n powerful guy on the

    hill. And he isn't necessarily a square guy of good morals, love, caring and fairless. Sadly, that all powerful fat

    cat that rules over the multitude is more often a kick 'em dem balls, cut-throat, immoral supremely confident

    narcissus son of a bitch.

    I like the concept of the Omega male. I haven't heard that one before.
    "I'm just a dirty hornytoad" -Gegogi

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    Phero Dude Marlboro_man's Avatar
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    Gegogi,
    That is a wikpedia

    definition which is also written by people such as ourselves, as a matter of fact I could go into it right now and

    change it completely to what I wanted it to be. Either way the question was "what does it mean to you gals" (or

    guys in this case, and that's what I have been answering. We all agree (or at least I think we do) that an alpha

    male is a leader who has earned the right to be followed. The question is why do we as individuals follow them? I

    know power and money don't influence my decisions but to each their own.

  27. #27
    Kodachrome Forever! Gegogi's Avatar
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    The question is why do we

    as individuals follow them? I know power and money don't influence my decisions but to each their

    own.
    That's 'cause you an alpha man!

    As for the wikpedia definition, it's very similar to

    the definition taught in college biology courses, so it isn't really out in left field.

    I wish I could

    ignore "power and money" but it ain't that easy. I ignore Pres Bush but his decisions still filter down into

    little-man-land bite me in the ass. Although I'm stuck with the consequences of his decisons, I don't follow or

    respect him. Nevertheless, he is the alpha-alpha male of the land, and I can't do jack squat about it.
    "I'm just a dirty hornytoad" -Gegogi

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    Phero Dude Marlboro_man's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gegogi
    That's

    'cause you an alpha man!
    Thanks for the compliment, that's about as nice of a thing as you could say to

    me!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by Gegogi
    I wish I could ignore "power and money" but it ain't that easy. I ignore Pres Bush

    but his decisions still filter down into little-man-land bite me in the ass. Although I'm stuck with the

    consequences of his decisons, I don't follow or respect him. Nevertheless, he is the alpha-alpha male of the land,

    and I can't do jack squat about it.
    I look at those people like this. They affect my DAILY life

    as much as the weather does and I have no control over it. Therefore I adjust as necessary and realize the only

    things that I can control are my interactions with people and the situations that I put myself in.

  29. #29
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    Default hmmm

    "Nevertheless, he is the

    alpha-alpha male of the land, and I can't do jack squat about it.".

    I respectively disagree. I would say

    that he's in the alpha-alpha male position of all-time but he's hardly alpha himself. With an approval rating of

    27%, and that's likely a vast overstatement of the truth, his only followers are people who don't seem to live in

    reality. I suspect his approval rating is closer to 10% of the population, if that. That's hardly a leader and

    alpha males tend to be leaders. And, you can do something about it by making your opinion known to your elected

    representatives but, as well all know, we did that this last election and it hasn't seemed too work well so far.
    There is a cure for electile dysfuntion!!!!

  30. #30
    Bodhi Satva CptKipling's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mungojerry
    It is a poem

    called "if" by Rudyard Kipling. Its posted on thounsands of sites on the internet.

    It is always a good one for

    sending a tingle down ones spine!
    Hey you could have given me at least a little time to bask in the

    adoration!

    Back on topic...I think that most ideas for an alpha male can be pretty much boiled down to

    Mungo's definition.
    CptKipling

    Information about pheromones: Pheromone Information Library

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