Some
comments:
1) Not exatcly. Being fun ONLY won´t realy earn you instant respect, but it helps a lot with breaking
the ice and creating a nice atmosphere; once it´s done, it´ll be easier for you to show other parts of your
character. Just don´t be the court´s clown.
2) There´s a number of good books and e-books (including free
ones) dealing with BL. The best way of really learning about it is to watch other people, specially when you´re not
in the spotlight. Observe other groups, how people in it react to some words and moves, try to understand what the
gestures mean and, of course, confirm them later on the "bibliography" you have. Take quick notes for yourself if
necessary. You won´t be able to interpret what they´re saying to you (and thus you won´t reply correctly) if you
can´t see what happens to others.
4) That´s a bit hard, but the best thing is to ask people that know you
well and do care about you. For example, my sister and one of my cousins play a big role in this "How´s this
shirt?", "Do I look nice?", "Do I smell bad?" thing. This may be a bit unconfortable in the beginning, but it ain´t
any trauma.
After some time, you won´t need to ask anymore.
5) it´s probably the worst part if you think
it is, or the best one if you wish to believe it.
The "ask the time" approach works quite nice; when I entered
college, I used to leave my watch at home or even in the pocket just to have this excuse.
If you´re not used
to start conversations, I´d advice you to try practicing when you´re in a good mood, avoid it when you´re down. The
reason is simple: if you get a bad result when you already don´t feel good, you´ll stick too much to it and be
depressed, while good results won´t have a great effect in your mind. Besides, it´s hard to show people how good you
are when you don´t THINK you are. So, do think you ARE.
But be aware that for each success, there will ALWAYS be
various failures.
Write down in a sheet of paper you good qualities, and maybe even some other you wish to
(and can) afford to have by yourself. Then hang it in a visible place, read it every day start and every singe time
you see it, think "Hey, I really AM this, and it´s good". Watch other people´s qualities, try to figure out how they
afford to have them, and eventually (not often) ask them about some points, like "hey, how can you maintain this
large smile all day long?", they´ll probably answer with something you could use too.
Sounds stupid, but it´s
guaranteed to work. Once you´re aware of, and maximizing your
qualities (and THEN the ´mones will be working
really nice), you can begin working out your bad parts - but probably not before this moment.
At
last, sorry for the long post, though I tried to be brief... and may the force be with you!
Bookmarks