Fantastic, that was
funny, entretaining and over all fine holiday fun. Thanks for posting that. Peace.
Give men a "body fragrance" and they'll surely stink up a room
By
Jim Shea
The Hartford Courant
Men do not do subtle.
Ask a man to keep a secret, and he'll announce to
everyone he meets that there is something he can't talk about.
Tell a man that the suggested dress attire is
laid back and casual, and he'll show up in flip-flops and a Speedo.
Give a guy a couple of beers and a dance
floor, and what comes to mind is electrocution.
So when marketers began hyping various men's body sprays, washes
and lotions as being irresistible to women, well, the male response has been predictable: They've been buying the
stuff by the vat, rationalizing that if a little bit of these fragrances will help you get a girl, then crop-dusting
yourself with a lot of the stuff will help you get a lot of girls.
This is why more and more men are walking
around these days smelling like they have been dragged through wild flowers, dipped in the ocean and then
water-boarded in rain-forest fruit pulp.
Men just do not do well with fragrances, which is why they should
probably not be allowed to purchase anything scented without a prescription.
Nor should they be permitted to
apply anything from the scent family to their bodies — with the possible exception of foot powder — without proper
supervision.
No, men are much better off teetering along the edge of funky. Give them a shower and Speed Stick,
and they should be good to go in most circumstances.
The only time men should resort to outside aromatic agents
is in situations where they have not had a chance to shower and their natural state might violate human-rights or
chemical-weapons treaties.
What is ironic about the current male obsession with fragrance is that it might mask
the natural scents that actually can attract women.
From what I have been reading, our bodies produce these odors
called pheromones. And pheromones — which are kind of complicated but seem to work like airborne Spanish Fly — can
make us appear appealing to the opposite sex.
A couple of key things to keep in mind about pheromones are: Unless
one has undergone bloodhound-tracking training, a human can't consciously smell them. And, in terms of appealing,
we're talking about initially appealing.
All the pheromones in the world aren't going to help if you're
middle-aged and still living with mom.
Another interesting thing about the attraction power of pheromones is that
we usually smell best to a person whose genetically based immunity to disease differs most from our own. Which, call
me sentimental, does kind of take the romance out of it.
"Good looks get you to the door, but it doesn't keep you in!"
Fantastic, that was
funny, entretaining and over all fine holiday fun. Thanks for posting that. Peace.
I live in a large condo complex
and my neighbor, a chubby middle aged Asian guy, sprays himself from head to foot with cologne, stinking up the
hallway for hours. I guess he doesn't want to stink out his roomates so does the deed in the hall. My eyes burn as
I walk down the hallway, and I can smell his trail all the way to the parking garage. Nevertheless, I've known a
few women to be gulity of hosing themselves down with scent, so it ain't just a guy thang.
"I'm just a dirty hornytoad" -Gegogi
The author is an idiot.
If this
was written by a woman it might be mildly amusing, but the fact that it was written by a guy is just sad,very
sad.
Yes I understand that it might be satire but do we have to put up with this dumb shit from another man? I
find it to be another example of the "men are stupid" camp that we see far too often in the media.
ummm, time
for another beer i think.
Im with you on the "men are
stupid" thing.Men tend to get a very bad rap in alot of areas these days,even though we realy dont deserve it.In
most cases,women arent any brighter or more inteligent or more capable than men.If you doubt my word on that,ask a
woman to design and build a turbine engine,complex multiple reduction gear,turret lathe,particle
accelerator,suspension bridge,intercooled turbo charger,hydroelectric dam,retail department store,high resolution
spy satalite,thermal imaging camera,computerised axial tomography machine,lipstick container...All of these
important contributions to day to day living were brought to you by...yup...MEN!
Although,alot of guys do tend
to lay on the old spice alittle heavy.
No doubt there are many brilliant
men. And the author of this article doesn't appear to be one of them.
But it's also true that subtlety is
not our strong point. And I run into very few guys that can wear cologne without leaving a chemical trail everywhere
they go.
Give truth a chance.
It'a all depends on body chemistry,
I must admit that I usually use about 5 sprays myself.
No complaints though.
DCW
Saw this posted on the Basenotes
forum yesterday, and found some of the responses to be interesting.
You are defensive aren'tI find it to be another
example of the "men are stupid" camp that we see far too often in the media.
you? The article is humor based on male stereotypes we all know and love. It doesn't say or imply men are stupid.
Men are merely less refined than women when it comes to scent choice and use. Nevertheless, you should see the
difference between test scores and term papers my male and female students produce. Men lag behind bigtime. I think
men merely have different priorities in life than women, and studying ain't one of them. It has nothing to do with
being stupid.
"I'm just a dirty hornytoad" -Gegogi
Yeah...it was a shot at humor
based on male stereotypes.And...well...I tend to be alittle over sensative on the subject from the stand point that
this stereotype has been used to destroy so many of my friends in divorce court.Sort of like the stereotypes that
land innocent black men in prison for crimes they couldnt have commited.
On the flip side of the
coin,being subtle has never realy been the male strong suit.If you look at the rather abreviated list of things I
mentioned above that have been brought to the world by men,you will notice that none of them are exactly
subtle.Suspension bridges and hydroelectric dams and turbine engines have a way of being alot less than subtle.And
in terms of fragrances...well...I can smell the old spice from here
"The wages of sin is death.But after taxes it's just sort of a tired feeling realy." -Ellen DeGeneres
Be careful what you say. Someone may pay attention.Originally Posted by tim929
I liked the article. Thought it was spot
on.
Probably described me in my heavy cologne days a couple of years ago (but I smelled great...).
Originally Posted by tim929
Hate to break it, but there are alot more white innocents that were unjustly convicted.
In Hawaii over 50% of the people
in prison are native Hawaiians, although they make up less than 1% of the population. They once numbered in the
hundreds of thousands. I'm not sure what that means, but someone sure got shalfted. Hawaii was a constitutional
monarchy a little over a 100 years ago. The US Marines put a end to that and built a really nice harbor for the new
"Pacific Age."
"I'm just a dirty hornytoad" -Gegogi
Sorry if my reply seemed over the
top , must be a hormonal thing as i can (sort of)see the funny side now..
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