Reply With Quoteeverything was said online
What to do if you become too cocky
Ok
I was saying things to be cocky and funny but I went a little too far and became to her a "jerk". Is it bad when a
girl calls you a jerk? Is it better then being too nice? Would apologizing totally ruin everything between us?
everything was said online
in what context did she say
jerk?....most likely its nothing and i wouldnt worry about it
screw you, your being a total
jerk
Is there any way you can come
up with an excuse to make up for it? Like you were having a bad day or you were just feeling crappy or something?
Nothing is definate to the point that somebody will totally hate you, unless you went REALLY far.... how far did
you go?
probably depends on what broke the camels back . womenOriginally Posted by DeMoKiLL
are usually more forgiving then men though we get uglywhat did you say to her?
compliments and
flowers work. one long stem rose to my former gf now wife got me happy everytime.
don't worry
about what see thinks, that is not the goal. the goal is to create attraction, she doesn't necessarily have to like
you to be attracted to you. if you don't think that's the true, read some women's magazine about how they hook up
with guys they hate. worrying about what she thinks is also seeking approval, another no no. apologizing is also
seeking her approval. my opinion is you'll pull more girls by being too cocky than being nice.
when you do
something, think about these questions. are you leading? are you doing things on your own terms? are you seeking her
approval/validation? are you qualifying to her? the answer to the 1st 2 should be yes and the answer to the last 2
should be no.
Well idk, I just kept saying
stuff like I was going to print the convo out and pass it around then what really got her is when I called her ugly.
From what i've heard and read from people is its ok if she calls you a complete asshole. Oh well at school
tommorrow ill just play it off like it was nothing, and see her reaction.
So your saying that its ok to be a jerk to her near the point her hating me, as in that will
get her to like me more?
ugly is tough man. the girl should
be gorgeous and understand that you are c&f for a comment like that. but you're stuck, don't back down.
i'm
not saying do it on purpose, but if you go overboard don't back down but than don't keep adding to the fire.
aiming for a girl to hate you is not what c&f. i meant it in the context she likes you as a nice guys vs hates
you.
another thing there's 4 ways to be c&f.
1) c&f about your self.
refering to yourself in the 2nd and 3rd
person
basically being self absorb
2)c&f about her
basically giving her a hard time
3)c&f about everything
else besides the 2 of ya'll
cracking on somebody that's dressed bad
4)role reversal
taking a woman's frame
and putting a man's frame on her
accuse her of being needy, a loser, weird etc
stuff that women say about guys
there's more examples that's all i can think of offf the top of my head.
my 2 cents: dont back
down but make it like nothing if she talks about it just say its a joke & make another one less provocative [to make
her forget the first one...]
yeah accuse her of having no sense of humor, make it look like she's weird for not understanding
it's a joke
Very bad idea.
Sorry guys,
but brushing it off like it's nothing is just about the worst thing you can do here.
Teasing a girl is one
thing. Being cocky is one thing. Calling her ugly and saying you'll pass around the conversation is unmitigated
jackass behaviour. If I were this girl, I'd be hard pressed to EVER talk to you again.
If you're being "cocky
and funny" with the intention of flirting, you're ok in teasing her about being too quiet, too loud, being a tease,
doing somethng embarresing, etc. It's ok to tease her about behaviour. NEVER tease a girl about something she
can't change, like how pretty she is, how tall or short she is, her race, or anything. BAD BAD IDEA. And never
tease about violating her trust. Some girls do go for the bad boys, but that's mostly because we feel special when
they treat everyone like crap and treat us well, or we think they're sexy in that attitude. But a violation of
trust just instantly puts you in the undateable loser catagory, and sexiness is about 90% mental. You just made a
huge mistake with this girl, HUGE.
If you want to recover a friendship, let alone anything remotely romantic
APOLOGIZE IMMEDIATELY AND PROFUSELY. Frankly, if I were this girl and we were friends before, I'd allow you to
apologise and be friends with you, but I would probably consider you undateable for all time until you grow up. If
I didn't know you very well before, I'd say it's alright but stop being friends with you, only saying cursory
hellos in the halls and so forth. But who knows, everyone's different.
But one thing's for sure...if you
don't apologize very well and very soon, you can kiss this girl goodbye.
Best of luck,
~Silver
Need we even say that calling a woman "ugly" is NOT akin to "creating
attraction"?
Consider yourself blessed if you ever have a chance with her again.
Agree with Silver. There's a
thin red line with teasing, and calling her ugly is just more of a downright insult. Remember, you don't have to be
a jerk to be cocky and funny. You can be totally nice and still be cocky and funny and playful, I think girls like
that. Playful means teasing, not insulting.
Demo it's best to not try and make a bad rep for yourself, since
your still in highschool word spreads fast (well, at least it did in the hs I was from), so if you appear as a jerk
to one girl, she'll probably tell her friends and you've just blown your chances with them too. Try to make up for
it, stop trying to be so c&f this, c&f that, you can still get a girl without being too c&f. Start slow with the
stuff, it's best to be under c&f than TOO much c&f, the latter will make you seem like a downright JERK.
Well..it´s supposed to be cocky
AND FUNNY and i think you should turn the cocky down a nodge an concebtrate on being funny...it takes some skill
though
Online is a handycap anyway because you can´t use your bodylanguage and voice tone..and that is
the most important part. And is you take it to far than you can give her a smirk or say "come on...I´m just teasing"
afterwards acuse her of having no humor
stroke her and at the same time tell her she hasn´t earned it and she´s being a pain in the a..tonight and you
should charge her for being like that...but it´s all in how you say it...in a fun and playful way.
Well that was my
two cents
"He who makes a beast of himself
gets rid of the pain of being a man"
DR. JOHNSON
Greetings SirAngel
Demokill,
Sounds to me like
you don’t much care for this girl. Otherwise why would you say such things? Even if you are a jerk.
I
used to get in conversations with this lady that always frustrated me by trying to push her extreme, uninformed
opinions on me. I knew the only reason I bothered to talk with her was her cute looks and flirty mannerisms. Deep
down inside, I always felt she was selfish and stupid. But I’d always find myself stuck in these uncomfortable
conversations just the same. At some point I almost always clammed up and waited for a good moment to politely
excuse myself. Often leaving the coffee shop long before I intended to.
One day she caught on and asked,”Why
do you always act like you want to run away? I thought you liked me.”
That’s when I broke character and
said something that completely surprised me (not to mention the girl):
“I do like you. But I’d probably
like you better if you’d just shut up and blow me.”
Of course I didn’t get the BJ, but at least now we
can exchange polite smiles and share the same public space without making each other uncomfortable. Sometimes
honesty really is the best policy. Especially when it comes to being honest with yourself.
I think you
should just move on to some girl that you can really respect.
Give truth a chance.
jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjdddddddddddd
Last edited by Mungojerry; 10-05-2015 at 07:09 AM.
YOu should never tease about
something physical about her. Only things like her cloths, attitude, the way she walks, her expression,
etc.
It depends how she calls you a jerk (which is hard to know online). If she says, "oh, you're such a
jerk!". And maybe gives you a little smile or laughs, you've hit the right target. Women don't usually call
someone a jerk unless there's some interest, they will just ignore you.
Don't appologize! If she really
thinks you're a jerk, appologizing probably won't help. If she thinks you're a "jerk", appologizing will make put
you into the "wussy" zone.
To be completely frank, you guys
are full of crap. You're too concerned with protecting your own precious masculinity that you become total
jerks.
Apologizing does not make you wussy. Apologizing for everything can make you tiresome, but apologies,
even when they are not necessary, are really sweet. In fact, I don't think there's anything sweeter than a guy
saying "i didn't know that this would offend you, but I'm sorry anyway," although that doesn't apply in this case
since anyone should know that calling a girl ugly is a no-no. I want a guy who is secure enough in his own
masculinity that he can be sympathetic, sentimental, and apologetic. That false bravado self-aggrandizing "I won't
apologize ever even though I know I was wrong TO CALL HER UGLY" is a clear sign of an insecure wuss trying to
overcompensate. Trust me, it's an instant turn-off.
Women admire men who are willing to admit when they are
wrong. This doesn't make you weak, this makes you adaptable, flexible, willing to learn, grow, and mature.
Admitting that you're wrong is one of the hardest and strongest things that anyone, man or woman, can do.
As
for calling her ugly, the only example in which I could possibly IMAGINE that being acceptable is if 1) she's drop
dead gorgeous 2) she knows it, and therefore is not at all insecure 3) you've known her for a long time, AND 4),
you follow it up immediately with a compliment, ie "I'm just kidding, you know I think you're gorgeous". Don't
say she doesn't have a sense of humor, that's just piling on another insult.
Grow up ,guys. Be men, not boys,
and real men always are secure enough to admit it when they are wrong.
~Silver
Growing up takes years, and sometimes
even that's not enough.
Your right.
If she was
trully insulted, you should appologize.
It all depends on how she said you were a jerk. I've said some
pretty outragious things to women and they give me one of those, "Oh you're such a jerk" with a smile and ususally
a hit in the shoulder. If this is the attitude she said it with, you've got some sexual tension going with her and
an appology in that case will ruin it.
This is a useless routine and won't save your arse after making a mean orWhen going too far with
cocky funny, i've found the best way to get round it is to just say flatly "Cummon you know I was only joking" or
if i've known the girl a bit longer "Look, you've known me long enough to know what my sense of humour is like, I
was only joking"
insensitive remark. In other words, if you say something mean and try to retract it with the "I was only joking
excuse," it ain't gonna fly. You'll be forever remembered as a dickless moron. An apology helps but won't be
taken seriously if you continue acting the same way.
"I'm just a dirty hornytoad" -Gegogi
Excellent! Concise and to the point.
As I've said before, it amazes me that so many guys see a woman's opinion about how a woman feels or
thinks about something they have to argue with her. Listen up guys, she knows what she is talking about.
To compel a man to subsidize with his taxes the propagation of ideas which he disbelieves and abhors is sinful and tyrannical.
Thomas Jefferson
dssssssssssddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd
Last edited by Mungojerry; 10-05-2015 at 07:10 AM.
what women say they want and what
creates attraction are 2 different things. i'm cocky, arrogant, and self absorbed all the things women say they
hate. according to women nobody should be attracted to me, but about half the girls i meet through social circles
are attracted to me.
I
totally disagree!
I listened to women about how to deal with women for years and it got me more dates with
my hand than I care to admit to (I'm sure some of you can relate).
I was a "sweet, sensitive guy that showed
my feelings". I did nice things for women, etc. all on the advice of women. It was a great way of aquiring many
woman friends that would come to me when their "jerk" boyfriends mistreated them. If I had a dollar for everytime I
heard "I wish I could meet a nice guy, like you", I'd be a rich man!
Whatever works for you. I'm
polite, quiet, have a good sense of humor, am independent and self assured. Yes, I have many female friends along
with a solid relationship with a pretty, bright woman with a great attitude. I get hits fairly often, got another
good one this morning from a nice looking 35-ish lady banker.
My advice isn't to be what you keep calling a
nice guy, it's to treat women well while retaining your independence. I think that is close to what Silver is
saying also. I've also got up and walked away from women who want to play games. I don't play them and will not
deal with a woman who does.
But, like I said, whatever works for you. My way has worked well for me for many
years.
To compel a man to subsidize with his taxes the propagation of ideas which he disbelieves and abhors is sinful and tyrannical.
Thomas Jefferson
Let me define a few terms for the
uninitiated. You guys keep throwing the words cocky, confident, arrogant and self-absorbed as if they all mean the
same thing. They don't.
Confident is thinking you're the shit.
Cocky is acting like you're the
shit.
Arrogant is acting like you're shit's hotter than everyone else's shit, and that you're so much better
than everyone else.
Self-absorbed is talking about nothing but how you're the shit.
All women love confident
men, hands down. Some women like there men a little cocky as well. I for one, like men who are very confident and
a little to a lot cocky, depending of if they've actually earned the right to be cocky by actually BEING the shit.
Very few women enjoy arrogant men, because they just make us feel worse about ourselves. Similarly, very few women
like self-absorbed men, and usually these are just the quite ones who are relieved someone will keep talking.
However, demo, you called her ugly, and that makes you, in her eyes and now in the eyes of all her friends, a
bonafide jerk. And no one, and I mean NO ONE likes a jerk. You can be a jerk to other people, sometimes, but if
you're a jerk to her you are history.
And as a response to Trock and Pherosurf, wow you guys sound just a tad
bitter. You're partially right, but you just don't recognize what's really going on. Women know what they want,
almost always, but sometimes they have a hard time recognizing it in people. These girls dating jerks are usually
searching for confident, slightly cocky guys, and mistook the jerkish arrogance of some guys for it. If all they
want are jerks, they why do they dump these guys? Why do they get mad when they act like jerks? It's because
they've realized that they were mistaken. They might stay with a guy to try to change him, but they're not
staying because they want a jerk. Yes, we don't like pussies, and yes, sometimes we snub the "sweet sensitive
guys", but it's usually because they lack confidence. Show them a guy who's confident and sweet at the same time
and they'll take that over an arrogant SOB any day.
My call for maturity doesn't just apply to guys. There
are many girls today that just need to grow up as well and recognize the difference between confidence and
arrogance. But a real woman knows the difference. Maybe acting like a bastard will get you more dates. Maybe
itwill get you more one-night -stands. But if you're looking for a lasting connection with someone special, then
you better shape up and grow up.
Oh and pherosurf? If the thing you're most concerned about is not that you h
aven't found a nice woman as a companion and girlfriend, but rather that you haven't gotten laid enough, then
it's no wonder that you end up with dates with your hand. We women HATE that.
Hope this helps,
~Silver
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