How about "Like a camel
passing wind"?
Sir Elton John Sulks Following Arafat Funeral Snub
Nov 12 2004 by John Hetherington
Those
close to pop diva Sir Elton John tell DeadBrain that the superstar is "in a snit" after learning that he had not
been invited to perform a new version of "Candle in the Wind" at the funeral of Palestinian leader Yasser
Arafat.
Sir Elton had reportedly sent no fewer than four versions of the song to Arafat's wife Suha as she
kept vigil at her dying husband's bedside.
"Suha just felt Elton wasn't really trying, like he was phoning
it in," explains one Arafat confidant. One of version of the song, "PLO Leader in the Sand," is said to have been
virtually identical to the version he had recorded for John F. Kennedy Jr.'s funeral - another occasion in which
the garish pop singer was left out in the cold.
Confidantes of Suha Arafat say that the grieving widow was
holding out for a performance by Sting. "She really loved him when he was in the Police and has deeply respected
much of his solo career," reported one friend.
Some have theorized that it is the fact that John has become
"the leper of celebrity funerals" that is responsible for recent high profile outbursts.
Fresco Swoosh, who
began working for John as a pillow fluffer before being promoted to Wednesday hair-comber, says the pampered singer
is obsessed with death. "He's made wish lists, you know, of the people he'd like to see dead, and he's written
different versions of 'Candle in the Wind' for them. It's a bit creepy to be honest."
But it may be more
than just hoping for deaths. Some speculate that John may be prepared to take things into his own hands.
"He
knew that I'd been combing Elizabeth Taylor's hair on occasion," said Swoosh, "and he said what a shame it'd be
if we every lost her. 'Big funeral,' he said, and then grinned and handed me an envelope with cash. He said, 'You
know what to do.'"
Representatives of Elizabeth Taylor tell DeadBrain that she has already commissioned
close friend Michael Jackson to perform a very special rendition of "Thriller" at her funeral.
How about "Like a camel
passing wind"?
DrSmellThis (creator of P H E R O S)
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