New anecdote.
Last night I
went to dinner with another of my nieces (to celebrate her upcoming birthday) and some of her friends. There were
two women, two boys, and four men in the group (counting me). Call the niece Angie, the niece's girlfriend Wendy.
Angie's boyfriend Tom came along, and Wendy's boyfriend Rupert came along with his two sons. A male friend,
Robbie, was also there.
I sat at the head of our table. Tom sat to my right, Angie (my niece) sat to his right,
Robbie sat on her right, and opposite from me was Older Son. On my left was Younger Son, on his left was Wendy, and
on her left was Rupert. All the names have been changed to keep me confused.
So, during the evening, I noticed
that Angie and Wendy kept mirroring each other. They were very comfortable with each other, having been friends for
years. Rupert occasionally leaned back in his chair and sometimes leaned toward Wendy. She occasionally leaned
toward him. Wendy occasionally leaned toward me as well (I was wearing pheromones and a good cologne).
Robbie
sat at an angle, with his body facing our table and occasionally leaning toward Angie (my niece). I decided that he
likes her, but I don't know if he is romantically interested or just very good friends with her. I have heard about
Robbie from all the family, who insist I should have met him already, but this was the first time he and I had ever
run into each other.
Tom did not lean toward Angie. He did not mirror her body language at all. She occasionally
leaned toward him. He stayed focused on the table and often led the conversation. Once in a while he put his arm out
to "claim" Angie and he occasionally kissed her. When Tom and Angie are together, they are very affectionate but it
is clear to everyone in the family that he is not committed to her. I noticed how his body language reflected that
last night. The whole clan is convinced she is heading for heartbreak.
Anyway, it was an interesting exercise in
reading body language of some strangers up close when they were not really interacting with me. And I did get to
read some body language of people at other tables.
There was a girl in a red dress sitting at a 45 degree angle
off to my right. I had to look over Tom's shoulder to see her, so I could easily act like I was looking at him and
still give her eye contact. She often looked back at me and I stared her down. Each time, she would lean to her
left. I noticed her male companion, probably her boyfriend, was leaning to HIS left, so the sequence would be: girl
glances at me, I notice girl looking at me, I stare back, she looks at boyfriend and mirrors his body language.
This happened at least four or five times. He eventually turned around and looked in my direction but he could
have been looking for a server. At some point in the evening, they left the restaurant.
To my left, behind the
Younger Son (who was seated on my immediate left), there was a table with several women. One of them got up an went
to the restroom a couple of times, preening as she walked by us. But no eye contact.
A family sat down behind
Older Son at the far end of the table. A father, mother, and two teenage daughters. The older teenage daughter
occasionally made eye contact with me and I was a bit amused, somewhat curious. She seemed to be mirroring her
father's body language, so I occasionally decided to mirror hers. It didn't seem to have any effect, so I am not
sure her eye contact was for real. She may simply have been staring off in my direction. But at one point I noticed
she was dipping her tea spoon into her tea (up and down, up and down) and looking in my general direction. That is
very similar to the classic stroking gesture. She repeated it with a straw a little while later.
Both times she
did the stroking gesture, she immediately turned to her father and mirrored his body language.
Mom had her back
to me and I never saw much movement from her. The younger sister seemed pretty quiet, too. Dad was the most
expressive one in the group. It was an odd study in body language.
I occasionally glanced around the restaurant
but none of the other patrons were in positions where I could watch them without blatently staring.
I would
consider the girl in red a hit. Our server, a guy, tended to conduct business with our table from my end. I would
say that was more because I was the man at the head of the table than for anything else. I don't think Wendy was
being anything other than friendly, although she occasionally caressed her hair. Since she is living with Rupert,
one would think she was doing that for him. But she could just as easily have been doing it for Tom or for our
server (a tall, good looking guy). She could also have just been stroking her hair. But she never stroked her hair
on Rupert's side. In fact, she rarely looked at him. Most of her attention was on the rest of the table.
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