Reply With Quoteor if she brings a girl friend.
try to have more fun with her friend.
Omg! I can never get a 1 on 1
To those
who haven't been following my situation:
Been in a "just friends" relationship with a girl for 3 years. We then
went seperate ways to different colleges and now this summer I started hanging out with her again and it seems like
she's looking at me differently. Locking eyes, flirting like crazy, she's always calling me and inviting herself
over.
Well, the thing is, I can never get a 1 on 1 situation with her. The -mones seem to be working EXTREMELY
well with her (Chikara + TE gel which is running out, getting NPA this week though) but I can never get a solid
close with her (ie. holding hands, kiss, not even a cuddle or hug). I just invited her over to watch a movie
tomorrow... and she wants to invite our other friend. Why does it seem like she is avoiding 1 on 1 with me? I'm
afraid to step things up another level with others around... I'd feel much easier doing it 1 on 1 but as I said
before... I can never get it. Should I just go for it anyway, with others around?
or if she brings a girl friend.
try to have more fun with her friend.
That's one tack to take, but it could backfire in aOriginally Posted by TRock
big way. She may just write you off rather than give you a "WTF?" If you do get that, offer that you're interested,
but it seems she's not. That puts the ball back in her court to make the next move.
i don't mean try to do her friend
but just seem like it's more fun to hang out with her friend. nobody is dating anybody from what i understand?
she'll get jealous and try to get his attention.
I got a feeling reading your post from the other day, when you mentioned she
brought her family along to visit. I think she's including chaperons so she'll be "safe." Either she doesn't want
the relationship to go deeper and senses that you do, so is trying to discourage your advances, or she's scared by
the feelings of attraction she gets from being around you.
Just my opinion. I saw something similar with a
girl I used to work with who had been in an abusive relationship. She didn't want to get involved with any guys
after that. She left where I worked and coincidentally started working where my brother does. He developed the hots
for her and asked her out to go Jet Skiing. When she showed up for the date with her little nieces and nephews in
tow, I realized that she brought them along so my brother wouldn't be able to act on any ideas he may have had.
She could also be probing to
see how bold you are and hoping for an audience.
WASSUP!!!!!
yeah, i have to agree. Snoppy
i think you have to take the initiative. I have the same problem with a girl who likes me but treats me like a
friend. Its the weirdest thing. Anyway, I feel like you have to make a move.. I think she is somewhat interested in
you but doesn't want to come on strong. I think you have to try and ask her out on a date. Take her somewhere nice
and when your walking walk behind her and hug her or something. Make her feel comfartable. Then when she's speaking
to you and looks at u try and go for a kiss, she may pull away but that doesn't mean she doesn't want to. If you
want this girl for more than a friend you have to show her that...
Formally ask her out on
a date? I've been trying to avoid that, since I've been in a pervious "let's just be friends" relationship with
her.. where I've liked her and she didn't like me. If something formal like a dinner or a date gets thrown at her,
I'm pretty sure alarms will be going off in her head...
Nah, you're just afraid of
rejection. We all are.
But this is why you're using pheremones, isn't it? To try and tilt the scales more in
your favour? But they're not going to cause women to throw themselves at you, you still need to actually do
something if you want anything to go anywhere.
WASSUP!!!!!
True, I'm afraid of being rejected a
third (yes, third) time. I'm in the moving on phase, but she's just showing every single sign of attraction I
might as well just try one more time with her. I'm worried a lot about what others think, and she does act a little
less open around me when others are around. The only times I'm alone with her is when my friends go off to do
something else for a short while (which is rare) or while I'm driving her home (which is a silly 5 minute
drive)...
That's the
spirit!
Sort of...
WASSUP!!!!!
I'd go for it it if others
weren't around dammit! But they're always there!!!
And summer's running out! We're splitting up for school
soon...
you know if this is the 3rd time
you're gonna try it. i think you should sit back and let things happen. i think she will just reject you based off
of the last 2 rejections, if you make the move. you will appear needy and have no other options. save your ego for
another girl.
So in other words, wait for her to make a move first?
Ew, bad bad tactics!
If
you're getting all the right signs, throw an extra spray of Chic on and go in strong. Women can smell fear...it's
10 times more powerful than mones as far as their olfactorys are concerned.
WASSUP!!!!!
if i was in your situation i would
sit back and make her want you. use the mones to your advantage and target her female friends. have more fun with
them then you have with her. if those girls think you are cool, they talk about it among themselves. and if she is
hotter than her friends and you pay more attention to her friends that should make her want you to give her
attention.
bad
tactics if there's no history but these 2 have a history. and he's been shot down twice, think stever urkel or
screech. from what she does with the chaperones, i have a feeling it will be a tko if he makes another move.
I'm trying not to think
Steve Urkel or Screech. Successful guys have had to try multiple times too.
Regardless, the playing on the
jealousy thing can sometimes work, but if it backfires, it can make a horrible, horrible mess. Especially if
there's an ongoing friendship already in the works. I've been there.
WASSUP!!!!!
TKO is what
I'm scared of. I'd rather her like me and things never get going right now, then totally bomb out and screw up our
relationship. I can always try again next summer, hell we live 5 minutes from each other, but I don't want things
going to wierd land since she's also a really good friend of mine.
I think I'm going to stick with TRock's
advice and just lay back for now. If things get really heated, like she starts giving me DIHL's and stuff, then I
will go ahead and try some SMALL moves like touching her hand or something.
According to DeAngelo
you can't force Attraction, I would just move ON.
"Most women stop being attracted to a guy because he lets her know too early in the interaction that he likes her."
----Swinggcat
Perhaps you haven't been following closely.
She is VERY attracted to me. She locks eyes with me, foot-flirts with me under tables, I can sit close to her
without her budging, she opens up to me, calls me almost every single day asking when she can see me next. I'm not
forcing any of this on her...
I am simply asking if I should make a move or not, since we are never truly alone
together - most of the time friends or family are in the same room and every attempt to get a 1on1 with her turns
into multiple persons.
Alright, make your move
then.
"Most women stop being attracted to a guy because he lets her know too early in the interaction that he likes her."
----Swinggcat
yeah but the key word is
friendship. neither have told the other one that they're interested in each other like "that". nobody is dating
anybody from what i understand. that means they're free to flirt or do whatever with anybody they want.
but the
jealously thing isn't fool proof. in my opinion i would try the jealousy thing again instead of trying to make the
move. he has the mones working for him. if she thinks she's gonna lose him she'll make sure she won't by stepping
her game up. right now he's not really in control of the situation that's the problem. he wants her but doesn't
know that she wants him.
TRock is right. I'm not 100%
sure that she likes me, since I know there are other guys she goes out with and she mentions a particular one to me
a lot (but I never question it). Both of us are single, she and I have been close friends for 3-4 years now, kind of
like a neighbour too since she and I are separated by a park - a 10 minute walk at most. We never have a problem
getting together at each other's house to watch a movie or something, and curfew isn't much of a problem either
since we live so close.
fastseduction.com has a player's
forum. i've never been there myself, eventually i will but i'm sure you can get some good advice from the players
in the forum. i wouldn't take everybody's advice or choose the advice i like though. you're probably better off
taking advice from somebody with a high post count.
Snoopy, just tell her you want
to watch a movie with her, no one else, and leave it at that. Say nothing more. She either says yes or no. If she
says no, then you reply,
"Some other time, then." AND YOU DO SOMETHING ELSE.
End it there. She'll come back
with a counter-offer.
You have made this into such a complicated mess. Yes, she wants chaperones. You
shouldn't have a problem with that. You just need to lay down the ground rules. You are letting her control
everything and what has that got you?
Just be a man, say, "Look, I just want to spend an evening watching a
movie with you and no one else. Let me know when you want it to happen."
Period.
End of discussion.
It's as simple as that.
And quit analyzing. You've so
screwed yourself up with bad analysis, you're never going to get anywhere with this girl. You're letting what
sounds like a great girl slip through your fingers.
Worse yet, if you keep going with all these convoluted
schemes, you're just going to throw her away to be picked up by the first guy with some real confidence who comes
along.
So far, friend, that ain't you. You cannot change HER, but you can change YOURSELF.
Do it.
Wish I could have said it that simply.
Wow, this guy's good.
WASSUP!!!!!
I agree with this. However, since I believe Snoopy will think
that this is a very...harsh is the only word I can think of...thing to say, I'd suggest using, "Actually, I wanted
to hang out with just you because there's something I really need to talk to you about."
Something along those
lines. Similar to what Friendly said above, "Let me know when we can do that."
You can be a man without giving
a straight-up ultimatum. I know because I've given the ultimatum, and push leads to push-back.
i agree with friendly1 and
trock. don't analyse, be more with her friends. make her want you. snoopy, correct me if i'm wrong, but you've
read the DYD-ebook? what's the deal? read it 10 more times and take action. you said summer is gonna be over soon
and you're gonna be in different schools again, separated. so, what do you have to loose? just make her want you,
make her chase you. be busy and do not call her back always, when she calls you. make it easy and simple. the more
desperate you seem to her, the easier she playes YOU! take control immediately, because she controls you now.
period! stop doing things that do not work and instead do things that work! hehe, simple and easy! if she is really
attracted to you, then you have no hard times creating anticipation and she will want you badly after awhile, DO
IT!
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