Lighthearted headlines for dark times:

You know that he died, don't

you? Batteries were put in backwards and he just kept comming and comming...

Watch for these consolidations in

2008:
1.) Hale Business Systems, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Fuller> Brush, and W. R.> >

Grace Co. will merge and become:Hale, Mary, Fuller,

Grace.> >

2.) Polygram Records, Warner Bros.,> > and

ZestaCrackers join> > forces and become:> > Poly, Warner Cracker

3) 3M will merge with Goodyear and become:

> MMMGood

4.) Zippo Manufacturing,

AudiMotors, Dofasco, and> Dakota Mining> > will merge and become:> >

ZipAudiDoDa

5.) FedEx is

expected to join its competitor,> UPS, and

become:> > FedUP.

6.) Fairchild Electronics and Honeywell Computers will> become:> > Fairwell Honeychild

7.) Grey Poupon and Docker Pants are expected to>

become:> > PouponPants

8.) Knotts Berry Farm and the National Organization

of> Women> > will become:

> > Knott NOW!

And finally....

9.) Victoria 's Secret and

Smith &Wesson> will merge under the new name:> > TittyTittyBangBang