Hit report...the accidental alpha male
Tonight I went in to help with a couple of dance classes again and afterward planned to visit a club.
This is
the last evening for the month for these two classes. Next week, the classes start over again with new students. The
first dance class was a beginner class. It had started out with quite a few people this month, but by tonight was
down to a handlful of couples and one or two extra guys. It is important that you understand all but one of the
ladies in the class was there with a boyfriend or husband.
I wore two sprays of The Edge on my chest, 1 spray of
Chikara on each arm just below the elbow, and 6 dabs of APC (1 behind each ear, 2 on my chest just below my neck, 2
on the back of my neck). My cover scent was Jaipur.
So, I was pretty much into classic OD territory, as I had
already put on two sprays of The Edge late this morning.
Several of the ladies in that first class could not
take their eyes off me when they were not with their partners. No DIHLs. But they were all pretty much into me. A
couple of them tensed up when I stepped in to show the guys dancing with them how to do some steps. I almost laughed
out loud when the cutest girl in the bunch locked her hand around mine as I led her through a basic step she knew
very well. I had to say, "Relax!" quickly, and she immediately closed up her body language, because she realized I
had caught her in a moment of sexual excitement.
In the next class, there were more students and a much more
eclectic mix. These students have danced with me for two months so the girls are pretty used to me. Nonetheless, I
got more than the usual hair tossing, body mirroring, sidelong glances, and so forth. There were more guys than
girls, so I spent both classes just coaching people on technique or demonstrating moves with the teacher. She, of
course, had me demonstrate many moves, and it's impossible to say whether pheromones had anything to do with that.
But she seemed more comfortable and relaxed than I have felt her to be lately. That could be due to anything.
So, on to the club. It was not very crowded. But I noticed a lot of eye contact from the girls around the place. I
didn't dance, although I didn't sit still in my seat, either. There were only a few dancers in the place, and only
one of the dancing girls stood anywhere near me. But she was smoking one cigarette after another so I passed on
asking her to dance.
There was an endless parade of women past my table. Instead of making a beeline for the
restroom, they all took the long route to walk in front of me, several of them more than once. This is a classic
"Why don't you get off your lazy butt and meet me" move, for those of you guys who aren't sure of what it means.
If a girl has a choice of walking past your table 2-3 times or NOT, and she does walk past you, odds are that she
wants to meet you or someone else along the path.
It just so happened I was the only guy sitting in that part of
the club for most of the evening.
Now, one of the interesting moments came during one of the band's breaks.
There were two girls sitting fairly close to me. One of them had her back turned to me but I caught her glancing my
way a couple of times. Her friend looked at me a few times but stopped after I returned her gaze. Since they didn't
stand up much, it was hard for me to read their body language.
During the break, though, the male singer in the
band came over and spoke to the girls. He seemed very friendly with them and may have known them. He gave one of the
girls, the one with her back to me, his cell phone and she used it to snap his picture, I think, and to make a phone
call.
He moved into her body space and she started touching his arm. I chalked that up to her being very
interested in him, since she was giving him hair flips and was straightening her clothes. All the classic flirt
moves that one can detect from behind a girl came out, and as far as I could see, she was into him.
Well, soon
after I sat down, the club owner welcomed me. A little later I decided to engage him in a conversation. We hit it
off pretty well and he showed me around the place. Later on, while the male singer was putting his arm around the
girl who had her back to me, the club owner brought the female singer over to meet me.
Suddenly, every girl in
the place started looking at me and turning her body to me.
The girl with the male singer just turned 90 degrees
to her right so that she could "face" him, but she couldn't take her eyes off me. She totally forgot the guy was
standing right there next to her. Conveniently, he had to stop touching her. She had effectively removed herself
from HIS space. I don't think he realized what was happening.
I recently read an article about some researcher
(a woman) who has concluded that women will usually falsely flirt with a man upon first noticing him. Apparently,
they do this to test the man's intentions. If he seems too easy, they lose interest in him.
I was the only guy
in the club who wasn't with someone and who didn't try to talk to any of the girls. Several guys stopped to talk
to all the single girls.
It appears that my conversations with the club owner vindicated me as someone
important. He brought his son over to meet me, he sent the manager over to meet me. All the girls saw that. But when
the female singer sat down to talk with me, I was suddenly Mister On-The-Radar.
I just went to listen to the
band. I wasn't looking for anything. The pheromone OD was for the dance students (actually, I was hoping someone in
particular would be there, but she wasn't).
I share this hit report because the experience reinforced several
ideas I have read about recently. One was that report on how women will flirt with a man just to test him. Another
thing I read recently, and until tonight I didn't really think much of it, was that you need to validate yourself
socially in the eyes of women before they'll start to respect you as someone they want to meet.
That's not
exactly how it goes, but it's close enough. I was socially validated by the club owner, and when he brought that
singer over to meet me, I was suddenly the hottest guy in the club. All I did was sit there, sip a drink, and dance
in my seat to the music when I wasn't talking to anyone.
But I made the effort to talk to a few people, and in
doing so I made a real difference. I wasn't even thinking about what effect I might be having on the girls when I
got into those conversations, but forgetting about them helped me relax, be myself, and it showed off my best male
qualities.
