New Alcohol Warning Labels

Due to increasing products liability litigation, American liquor manufacturers have accepted the FDA\'s suggestion that the following warning labels be placed immediately on all varieties of alcohol containers:

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your bra and panties.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like a retard.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can sing.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at four in the morning.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically converse with other members of the opposite sex without spitting.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of inexplicable rug burns on the forehead, knees and lower back.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause pregnancy.

WARNING: the crumsumpten of alcahol may Mack you tink you can tipe real gode

SRH honey,

I posted this one on 22nd January. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]

But I laughed again so thanks for sharing. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smirk.gif[/img]

It\'s funnier to read this one out of SRH\'s feather [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]. Makes me think about her crouching around in a bar, singing (read groaning) with her panties down to her ankles.

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with her panties down to her ankles.

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Andy, shame on you!! [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/blush.gif[/img]

Nah Dove, I always tell them to leave the panties away, it\'s not my fault then. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

Seadove: No offense, but you\'re jokes aren\'t always funny, so I don\'t necessarily read them all.

Sorry if it\'s a repeat. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img] [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/blush.gif[/img]

Andy: How\'d you know I was posting from experience? [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]
Wait....Have we met before? Were you that guy that was in that place that night? [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/blush.gif[/img]

Honestly, no offense.Don\'t read my jokes. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]

But would you be offended if I make this my signature? [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tongue.gif[/img]

http://www.chotasher.com/images/monkeys.jpg

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But would you be offended if I make this my signature?

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Again, you give yourself way too much credit. I don\'t think anyone here cares what you do.

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Again, you give yourself way too much credit. I don\'t think anyone here cares what you do.


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You\'re really obsessed with ME Elana.Why don\'t you ignore me and everything will be fine.

You keep sending me all those insulting messages and then you came in a spasm and say \"I don\'t think anyone here cares what you do\"

See who\'s botrhering who?

You are a nut case

[img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/crazy.gif[/img] [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/crazy.gif[/img] [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/crazy.gif[/img] [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/crazy.gif[/img] [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/crazy.gif[/img] [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/crazy.gif[/img]

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You are a nut case


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Yet another one of your insults, People like you have made this forum so ugly.

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People like you have made this forum so ugly.


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Well....women, because we love sex 7 times more than men, can act kind of bitchy if we only get off 6 times more than the man.

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Honestly, no offense.Don\'t read my jokes. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]

But would you be offended if I make this my signature? [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tongue.gif[/img]

http://www.chotasher.com/images/monkeys.jpg

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I wouldn\'t be offended. Make it your sig. Make it your philosophy. Hey, make it your daily mantra. I really don\'t care.

It\'s silly.

I\'m not gonna stoop so low.

There won\'t be any signatures.

Sorry SRH, haven\'t seen this earlier. Yeah I\'ve been in some place that night and! I\'ve seen a crawling female and she even had redish hair (long). [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

Uh-oh, was she crawling on a bar? Hmmm... that coulda been me. Let\'s just keep this to ourselves, eh? [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img] [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tongue.gif[/img]

I have no idea where she was heading for, but I think she didn\'t know it either. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

DVK, it was probably that night both of went to that bar and had a little too much to drink.
Maybe Andy can fill us in on what all went on after we both blacked out? I seem to remember some gorgeous foreign guy...

I am sure it\'s better that you\'ve forgotten that. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

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I am sure it\'s better that you\'ve forgotten that. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

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I couldn\'t have been you. That would be impossible to forget. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img]