Help and advice please.

[tigereyes]

Hi

everyone.

Well, things are really hard at the moment. I thought i had got over my ex GF i know she has moved on,

and has no feelings for me but i cannot go one day without thinking about her. All of my ambitions, girls, friends,

looks, they dont mean a thing. I feel crap. This woman i really loved and i gave her everything, i treated her so

well. She took things from me that were very personal, not posessions but other things and then she just leaves. I

know she goes out and she\'s probably with other men, thats what hurts the most. I know that they dont care about

her and will just use her, that also hurts because i dont want her to be treated like that. I feel so low today,

this is the first time in a month that i feel like this and i knew it was coming. I dont know what to do, i look

around at other women and none of them come close to her. I saw her out 2 weeks ago and she looked so good, i felt

heartbroken i miss her. Just the times where it was just me and her doing silly things.

Sorry, i just had to let

a bit of this out because i am feeling so down. I wish she was still here, she wants to be friends but how can i be?

when every time i see her i want to be close with her. I get reminded of her EX\'s or guys that came between us

all the time and it eats me up. I guess thats why i want to move away from where i live.



/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/frown.gif

Please, no comments that will upset me.

[Icarus]

Reckon

we\'ve all felt like that at some point or another.

If you don\'t want an answer that\'ll upset you, all I

can offer is the vague platitude: Time is the healer, give it some more.

Good luck.

Steve

[Gossamer_2701]

</font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
Time is the healer, give it some more.


<hr

/></blockquote><font class=\"post\">

Wow Ssssssst..... that was deep. Good advice

/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/laugh.gif /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif

[Icarus]

</font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
vague platitude

<hr /></blockquote><font

class=\"post\">

[Pancho1188]

What

Ssssssst said...

I was there a little over 6 months ago, man...and I only got \'completely\' over it ~3 weeks

ago...it\'s not easy. There\'s no shortcut, no easy way out, no cheating away the pain. I\'ll tell you what

made it all but definite that I\'d be okay...I have no contact with her, I keep myself busy all of the time, and I

have my new \"post-gf-I-almost-married\" life. As Jimmy the Bartender of Men\'s Health once said, having

your ex-gf as a friend is anti-climactic. Your best times with her are behind you, and you\'ll never have them

ever again. Leave your past behind you.

The best thing to do now is to focus on yourself. Take a good look at

yourself, see where/who you are right now and where/who you\'d like to be. You have to look out for #1 right now,

and it\'s not so bad to rely on your friends for support, either. Go out with the guys, have a good time, and

enjoy life. It\'ll get easier. Go to the gym, read a book on a subject you\'ve always wanted to learn about,

buy a(n) movie/video game/CD/gadget/gizmo/outfit/whatever you\'ve always wanted, and turn yourself into the best

person you can be.

I know this sounds like \"the best revenge is living well\", but in my experience revenge

never makes you feel better. I should know because my ex was the happiest person alive, so I couldn\'t have hurt

her even if I wanted to...she even developed an eating disorder because she didn\'t have my compliments and

unconditional love anymore, but that just made me feel worse. Her friends tell me her new bf is an [censored] and

she actually has to defend him to everyone, but again...no such pleasure will ever be derived from that...except the

pride that I know I am the shiznit /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smirk.gif and have always been a good

person. Notice the only pleasure is from me feeling good about myself. You won\'t get it from outside sources,

it\'ll only come from within.

I\'m not just shooting off BS and cliches because this is exactly how I did it.

I came to L-S and bought some pheromones for fun and boosted confidence, I went out with friends and even developed

stronger bonds than I ever had in college, made a few songs and movies, studied psychology, faced childhood issues

that held me back in life, gained 15 pounds at the gym (something I\'ve never been able to do before, I contribute

it to age and my new mentality), and bought a whole new Old Navy wardrobe (Christmas gift

/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif) that even my ex thought made me look incredible...oh, not to

mention that I got a new job and moved into my own place...that was the kicker to keep me busy...I\'m even

thinking about volunteering to become a mentor to a HS student who probably grew up in a similar background as mine

(only worse).

I can\'t tell you that this information will help you. I can\'t say you will turn yourself

around tomorrow and be the happiest person to ever walk the face of the earth (sorry, my ex has that title...if you

knew her you\'d understand /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smirk.gif), but I can tell you what I said to

Manchorito a long time ago:

No matter where you are in life, you can either be sad, bitter, and depressed or

content and happy with yourself. Either way you look at it, your life will be the same for the moment, but in the

first scenario you feel like sh*t and in the second you can be happy enough to enjoy life, get what you want, and

become a better person.


That\'s all I have to say about that.

Good luck.

[Pancho1188]

...or you

could always try the Seinfeld approach...

Rachel : Jerry ...
Jerry : Yes?
Rachel : I\'ve been doing a lot of

thinking.
Jerry : Aha?
Rachel : Well, I don\'t think we should see each other any more.
Jerry : Oh, that\'s

okay.
Rachel : What?
Jerry : Nah, that\'s fine. No problem. I\'ll meet somebody else.
Rachel : You

will?
Jerry : Sure. See, things always even out for me.
Rachel : Huh?
Jerry : It\'s fine. Anyway, it\'s been

really nice dating you for a while. And ... good luck!
Rachel : Yeah, you too.

[EXIT63]

She\'s a

HOMO!

[bundyburger]

</font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
She\'s a HOMO!

<hr /></blockquote><font

class=\"post\">

LOL
Yep. For sure. /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif

[bundyburger]

</font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
As Jimmy the Bartender of Men\'s Health once

said, having your ex-gf as a friend is anti-climactic. Your best times with her are behind you, and you\'ll never

have them ever again.

<hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">

Oh...man that\'s excellent. Pretty much

says why it\'s so hard to let someone go who you had so many good times with.

Ok tiger, the guys above have

said it already. Time. ...it sux... but you have to find sh!t that keeps your thoughts off of it and your mind

moving on. /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/crazy.gif

[CptKipling]

</font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
No matter where you are in life, you can either be

sad, bitter, and depressed or content and happy with yourself. Either way you look at it, your life will be the same

for the moment, but in the first scenario you feel like sh*t and in the second you can be happy enough to enjoy

life, get what you want, and become a better person.

<hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">

Well said

Pancho /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/cool.gif

[tallmacky]

Pancho. As

I was reading your beautiful and emotional post in this thread, I noticed a salty mixture of H20 draining from my

eyes.......They were tears Pancho, your post had grabbed right ahold of my flip floppy fishy pissy kissy, heart. I

am so proud of you, your will and determination to strive on has left me indented emotionally to you. You may stand

up proud!

After I grab my blanky, a box of tissues, and my favorite female hypnosis seduction book, I will sit

down and look at the reflection of the \"person\" I see in the mirror and tell him, \"I love you too, buddy\".

/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif

[DrSmellThis]

I\'m a

bit damp myself, TM, just imagining you loving your squeezable self in the mirror. I\'ve been drawing big hearts

all over my salty body with an eyeliner today (I saw somebody do that in a movie the other day), just to love myself

in the same way that Tallmacky loves his own salty self. I know it takes a true man to wear his flip-floppy,

fishy, pissy, kissy heart on his shirtsleeve! At least that\'s what I\'m telling myself.

/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif So we have Pancho to thank. C\'mon, guys, let\'s say it

together: \"we\'re good enough, smart enough, and -- doggone it -- people like us!\" Pancho, your ex sure

sounds happy, with her new eating disorder and [censored] boyfriend. But you have still taught me personally

that, if I just have the right outlook -- even if things don\'t seem to be going right -- even if I have a 500rpm

spinning chainsaw up my [censored] -- I will be happy as a clam.

[Ash]

</font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
</font><blockquote><font

class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
No matter where you are in life, you can either be sad, bitter, and

depressed or content and happy with yourself. Either way you look at it, your life will be the same for the moment,

but in the first scenario you feel like sh*t and in the second you can be happy enough to enjoy life, get what you

want, and become a better person.

<hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">

Well said Pancho

/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/cool.gif

<hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">


Along with

that always remember that wherever you go, there you are!

[Pancho1188]

</font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
</font><blockquote><font

class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
</font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
No matter

where you are in life, you can either be sad, bitter, and depressed or content and happy with yourself. Either way

you look at it, your life will be the same for the moment, but in the first scenario you feel like sh*t and in the

second you can be happy enough to enjoy life, get what you want, and become a better person.

<hr

/></blockquote><font class=\"post\">

Well said Pancho /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/cool.gif



<hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">


Along with that always remember that wherever you go, there you

are!

<hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">

Austin: There you are!
Random Dude: Do I know

you?
Austin: No, but there you are!