Article on the Art of Flirting

[Kari]

http://www.sirc.org/publik/flirt.html (\"http://www.sirc.org/publik/flirt.html\")

[CJ01]

not read it

yet but those `guides´ always make me gag before I even come close to checking them.

/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif

[bjf]

this one

actually isn\'t one of those \"how to sleep with 80 women in two nights\" type of one.

it is more scientific.

I think you will remember seeing it posted on this forum before, and you will enjoy it.

[Kari]

</font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
this one actually isn\'t one of those \"how to

sleep with 80 women in two nights\" type of one.

it is more scientific. I think you will remember seeing it

posted on this forum before, and you will enjoy it.

<hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">

It was posted

before? DAMN! Here I woulda thunk I was original! &lt;g&gt;

[bjf]

yea, but

very rarely. I think twice in the last year, and then it disappears and people need to be reminded of its lessons.

[Sagacious1420]

Here you\'ll find that one and more (\"http://digilander.libero.it/linguaggiodelcorpo/flirt/\")

[Slinger]

I

didn\'t like that article. Too long-winded, so filled with boring things we already know that I couldn\'t have

gleaned anything useful out of it even if there WERE something useful in it. By useful, I mean something I don\'t

already know. One would think that article was designed for robots trying to mimick human behaviour. To summarize;

the article was over-analytical, with no real insights or breakthroughs to speak of.

No offense meant at all to

you Kari, that\'s just my honest review of the article, nothing against you buddy

/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif

Slinger

[oscar]

Slinger,

I\'m going to disagree with you on the value of the article that Kari posted. I\'m fairly sure

that I had seen it before too, and had probably scanned it much in the way that you did, thinking it was over-long

and basically a rehash of things I already knew. But yesterday I had some time on my hands and I read it as though I

were studying it for an exam, and came to realize that it was NOT long-winded, but rather extremely CONCISE.


This was driven home by an episode that I witnessed at a bar last night.

To make a long story as short

as possible, I was chatting up a couple of young ladies in a bar where I tend to know a few people of both genders,

but these were girls I\'d never met before. I\'d established a pretty good rapport with one of them, and we were

both enjoying what might best be described as an \"academic flirtation\" since I had already disclosed my

ineligibility to have made it any more than that.
The music was quite loud, and many of the precepts of the

flirting article as regards eye contact and conversational cueing became moot since one had to put their face

virtually side by side with the other\'s face in order to be heard. That by the way was a great setup for a

\"Wow, you smell really good!\", and a follow-up deep inhale of her neck, but I DID try to maintain the

progression of touching intimacy guidelines that I\'d just read a few hours earlier.

After about an hour

or so the level of intimacy and trust was such that we were getting almost as touchy-feely as if this WASN\'T

merely an academic flirtation, but more like a regulation, something\'s gonna get wet before the night is over

flirtation. I won\'t flatter myself too much here. Several shots of Tequila helped this along considerably. But

the issue of \"ineligibility\" was still there.

A bar buddy of mine comes from the back of the bar towards

the door and shakes my hand as he\'s preparing to leave. I realize that he IS an eligible receiver and I think to

myself (in Marlon Brando\'s voice) \'maybe some day he\'ll be in a position to do ME a favor.\'

I

introduce my friend to the girls, and he hits it off with the girl that I was chatting up easily as well as I was

doing minutes before. They\'re leaning in and talking in each other\'s ears and having a great time. I\'m

feeling like Wingman of the Year, figuring I\'d softened her up with my pheros and warmed her up with stimulating

conversation, and at least SOMEBODY was going to get his noodle wet as the result of my efforts.

The girls

have another couple of shots of Tequila, and that\'s when it happened. A little, tiny piece of lime remained on

the girl\'s lip after doing a shot, and like a fool my friend took his finger and tried to wipe it off. The girls

neck snapped back, her spine stiffened, her eyes went wide open, and she turned and looked at me as if to say,

\"Who the f**k does this guy think he is!!\"

Twenty minutes earlier I might have gotten away with LICKING

that little piece of lime off of her lip, considering how far I\'d progressed with her in terms of trust and

intimacy, but my friend hadn\'t established even the slightest level of touching intimacy, and here he was putting

his finger on her lip.
The gesture in itself was a friendly, even fatherly one, but in the context of the

ongoing flirtation, it was simply out of order. And he paid the price. Within a matter of seconds he had gone from

having his foot in the door to walking home alone. The \"progression\" and \"permission\" aspects of that

article immediately came to mind, and I promised myself that I would print out that article and give it to my friend

the next time I see him.

If it were HE who had read that article yesterday instead of me, he\'d probably

be calling me right now to thank me for last night\'s wingman work. As it is, he probably doesn\'t even realize

his mistake, and thinks that I introduced him to a whacko! But I know differently.

Older guys like me enjoy

saying things to younger guys like yourself along the lines of, \"I\'ve probably forgotten more things about

women than you\'ll ever know!\"

Maybe my friend had forgotten. Maybe he never knew!
Either way, it

never hurts to take a refresher course and brush up on your skills from time to time.

/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif

Oscar /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif

[CptKipling]

Cool

post, and bang on the money.