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ironration
07-06-2003, 12:12 PM
As I wrote in post titled \"Fear\" I have a problem with approaching and picking up women.

I will now eliminative this fear once and for all. The technique I will use is to write down a list of each and every situation that involves women and fear and then rank them according to the fear factor.

0 Will be no fear at all, and 10 paralysing fear, something you fear so much that you rather die then do it. I will then do everything on the list, starting with the easiest situations.

Each time I do a task on the list I will write down how much fear I felt. For instance asking a woman I don’t know for a dance may rank as 6 at start. But after having done it several times the fear will gradually decrease, becoming a 4, then a 3, then a 2, and then 1.

When I got a situation down to 0, I will do the next thing on the list until everything I fear will be eliminated.

Using extremely lame pick up lines that cannot possible work, just to eliminative fear of rejection: 9
Initiate a street pickup: 8
Initiate a bar pickup: 8
Asking a women for a dance: 6
Saying hi to random women in the street: 4
Initiate brief conversations with women working in stores: 4
Look random women in the street in the eye and maintain eye contact: 3
Asking random women what time it is: 2

Bubu
07-07-2003, 01:02 PM
Althou fear factor depends from person to person, I think it can be good idea. In a case of carefful use, You will see, if You make some progress in killing Your fear, and in which \"climb ratio\".
But, what if You will do all that things together, time to time, so You will have some \"middle\" offset fear ratio in say, week. (\"hardness\" of task/Your \"fear ratio\")*#of_tryes.
or (\"hardness\"/#of_tryes)/(\"Fear ratio\"/#of_tryes).
/Bubu
P.S Making a brief conversation in a market will be easier, than to make eye contact.

DrSmellThis
07-07-2003, 01:24 PM
I\'m very familiar with this approach. If you want that to go quicker, combine it with deep breathing/progressive muscle relaxation; both in the situationsif possible)and while imagining them vividly.

akinu
07-07-2003, 01:37 PM
Good. You are a guy who approaches his drawbacks analytically. Making your job easier, I will suggest you to go www.fastseduction.com (\"http://www.fastseduction.com\") and download the book called \"High Status Male\". I got it and he speaks the same language with you. Very educational book.

proteus
07-07-2003, 06:00 PM
There\'s a branch of thought which I tend to feel works better for me, which says rather than focus on a negative aspect that you want to eliminate, it\'s better to focus on it\'s positive counter e.g. instead of thinking of ways to eliminate fear (which only tends to make you think more and more about fear itself), focus on it\'s positive counterpoint i.e. courage/confidence. So rather than trying to eliminate fear, I\'d try to act confident, maintain that state and eventually it becomes a part of you. Of course what works for one doesn\'t necessarily work for another, but for me, this tends to work. You should check out the Ross Jefferies \"Unstoppable Confidence\" audio stuff that was posted here awhile ago - that stuff is great IMO.

furburger
07-07-2003, 07:03 PM
If you approach women with total honesty and no bs there should not be any reason for fear. If they don\'t like what you are with that then move on to the next. Women that are out there socializing all the time can read through all the crap and have probly heard everey bs story out there. Have confidence in yourself tell her why you have come over to talk and if she wants anything to do with you she\'ll let you. Trust me they all don\'t bite. There is no reason to be afraid. Just don\'t be an idiot.

Bubu
07-07-2003, 07:41 PM
</font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
.. imagining them vividly.

<hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">
BTW, good NLP approach that works, to come back in Your mind to Your situation, that You allredy been in to, and try to imagine, how would react and what would You do better.

ironration
07-07-2003, 09:27 PM
Well I think this combined with NLP is the best approach. I recently started using the Equaliser method by Ross Jeffries - you build an equliser on the inside of your mind, that you can use to adjust different feeling, quite powerful actually.

I also ordered Double Your Dating, advanced DVD series for 310$ today. That is 12 hours of video with one of the best teachers in this field. My end goal is to pick up 9 and 10s on a regular basis.

akinu
07-08-2003, 05:31 AM
As a person who has gone through Ross Jefferies for two years, I would suggest forgetting about him and getting the high staus male ebook. And whats the deal with the dvd set? Is it good? Does anyone know about it?

Sagacious1420
07-08-2003, 10:49 AM
Akinu-

I am marginally familiar Ross Jeffries\' stuff (much more familiar w/ NLP, in general), so I\'m certainly no expert. I know that there are forum members who highly regard his work. I\'m just curious about why you, personally, don\'t recommend it after 2 years of using his techniques? What were your impressions and results (if any)?

akinu
07-08-2003, 11:50 AM
Ross Jefferies material is excellent and awesome, but I think his way of teaching is very bad. He has so far taught the materials to hundreds of people and thus he doesnt want to repeat himself anymore, which makes him neglect most critical parts while teaching. Secondly, the success of Ross jefferies material depends on the social setting. The woman you are trying to seduce must be able to digest the aggressive sexual advances of the Jefferies tachnique; as you may well guess I cant use it in Turkey.

The guy himself is very aggressive and impatient and normally tells you to next the girl who does not respond to heavy ouvertures. I personally bought ALL of his material and lived with \"you are a lazy idiot who doesnt want to take action and take control of your life\" scum whenever I requested aid to integrate his stuff to Turkey. Two years later I discovered that I was not lazy or shy at all, indeed realized that girls were trying to avoid me because I was going too strong on them. Then I decided to easy things and all seems well now (at least they dont avoid me)

BUT, I strongly suggest Ross to people who find themselves shy and think that he is living in a sexually easy environment so that the women around can welcome sexual advances.