"Just Because" gifts, suggestions, opinions?

[pelotudo]

I did this in the past w/ my ex, and it ended up biting me in the ass...and I told myself I wouldn\'t do it again; but I think I want to.

Just something small, like a 1/2 dozen roses or a small gift given to a girl to show her you were thinking of her. What do you guys think about this, after say 3-4 weeks going out w/ someone? What about suggestions about cheap but good presents that will show her you\'re thinking about her? I could have sworn I saw a thread on this before, but coudln\'t find it.

-Jon

[oscar]

Jon,

You should give her the dick first.
THEN you can start thinking about giving her roses and all that cute-sy $hit.

Oscar /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif

[Sexyredhead]

Some \'just because gift\' ideas:

-a book (if she likes to read)
-a cd
-flowers--daisies are good--doesn\'t have to be roses
-a plant
-body lotion (that you like the smell of or goes with something she already wears)
-stuffed animal (I really don\'t like them, but some girls do /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tongue.gif)
-candy

Most of these are even I-saw-this-and-thought-of-you-so-I-picked-it-up gifts too, so she may not get creeped out if you start buying her stuff all the time. I feel a little weird about guys that buy me stuff all the time, but again, that\'s just me. /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smirk.gif

Don\'t get into the habit of buying her stuff in order to try to keep her. It doesn\'t work. Just a word of warning. /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif

[Sagacious1420]

To date I have had great success w/ Godiva chocolates, particularly the balotines - they\'re attractive and tasty. What girl doesn\'t like chocolate? I simply order a small box and have it delivered w/ a simple note saying something like \"Just thinking of you\" or \"You were on my mind.\" You don\'t have to say anything about how much you like her (or love her, if that\'s the case), she knows that simply by the gesture of taking the time to do something just for her. I think it is a better surprise to have it dropped off at their home, or even better at work where she can gloat in the fact that she has admirers sending her \"sweet nothings\", rather than me giving it to her personally. If she you coming w/ something hidden behind your back or whatever, it\'s really not a surprise...she see\'s it coming. Girls have said that every time they eat a few pieces they think of me and what could be better w/out having to make a sappy overture or spending a fortune on roses. I can say w/ absolute certainty that they are thinking of me, because they call me every time they break into their chocolate stash. Phone conversations can get very interesting after a couple of glasses of port and a nice chocolate buzz. /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tongue.gif


I think roses are extremely cliche and if I were to give roses, it would be a single rose of the appropriate color. Keep in mind that different colors of roses carry w/ them a different \"meaning\". In fact, different varieties of flowers each have their own meaning. I think I have a list of flowers and their meanings around here somewhere, so if you\'re interested, PM me and I\'ll send it your way. If there is enough general interest, I could post it in a separate thread, I suppose. Anyone...anyone...?


In general, I agree that a house plant is better than flowers. Think about it, flowers wither and die...not the most encouraging symbolism, however, a plant lives on and she has an interest in nurturing it and making it thrive (not unlike your relationship). Now, as she\'s nurturing your gift, she may think of you in the process. This keeps you on her mind and just consider the symbolism in the house plant scenario. Which do you think would be most effective?


In general, when I\'m considering a small \"just because\" gift, I think about what most guys would do and come up w/ something else, something unique...especially if it is something related to a personal interest of hers. Make it unique and personal, separate yourself from the crowd. The more personal it is, the more it conveys the message that you were actually thinking of her and not just a generic girly gift. You are telling her that you think she is unique and you are thinking of her...or should I say, she knows that you really are paying attention to her...that seems to be a biggy for girls. I tend to think that girls believe men to be generally cluseless and don\'t pay attention to what is important to them. So if you handle the small \"just because\" gift well, you are sending some powerful messages other than just giving her some kind of \"thing\". It doesn\'t have to be expensive, besides that\'s what most guys do in an attempt to impress them...it really is the thought that counts. If she is more interested in how expensive it was, then run! /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif

Just my 2 cents. /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif

[Sagacious1420]

</font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
Most of these are even I-saw-this-and-thought-of-you-so-I-picked-it-up gifts too, so she may not get creeped out if you start buying her stuff all the time. I feel a little weird about guys that buy me stuff all the time, but again, that\'s just me. /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smirk.gif

Don\'t get into the habit of buying her stuff in order to try to keep her. It doesn\'t work. Just a word of warning. /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif

<hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">

SRH-

BINGO!

Out of the mouths of babes....well, OK, I\'ve never actually seen a picture of you (wink, wink, nudge, nudge), but I\'m comfortable w/ the assumption. /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif

Thanks for posting! /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif

[DaVinciKittie]

So far SRH and Sag have given you some great suggestions. In fact, I\'m glad I read through the thread before I posted this or I\'d have said nearly the same things for the most part. Personally, I get really uncomfortable when guys start buying me things, especially flowers. Flowers are so cliche. Like Sag said, don\'t give roses unless it\'s a single one (or maybe 2, to symbolize the two of you) and for god\'s sake don\'t make it RED! Find out what the colors symbolize and give her one that\'s appropriate, if you\'re just set on flowers- maybe she\'ll even know the symbolism and you can impress her with your knowledge. /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif I prefer other types of flowers tho. Personally, I like calla lilies and sunflowers, and not roses at all. I think the type of flowers a woman likes says a lot about her, so if a guy gives me one of my perferred flowers without me mentioning that I like them- *SCORE*! I know he\'s been paying attention, and I know he \"gets\" me (a florist might be able to give you recommendations if you describe Jenna for them). Forget all the stuff they pack the flowers in, just give it to her with a single ribbon or something like that.

Anyway, that\'s enough about flowers. They\'re way over-rated anyway, IMHO. /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif The things that really get to me are the little things he does that obviously aren\'t premeditated. For example, say you\'re walking with Jenna through a park and you see a patch of little wildflowers. Pick one and tuck it behind her ear, maybe giving her a light kiss, and then continue on with the conversation as if nothing out of the ordinary just happened. If you\'re ever in her bedroom, bring something along with you- maybe a candy you know she\'s fond of or something silly that you think will make her smile, and leave it under her pillow before you leave. When she goes to bed I guarantee she\'ll be thinking of you, amd smiling. /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tongue.gif It\'s difficult to think of more examples b/c these things should be unique to her and your relationship. So pay attention and one day you\'ll be going about your business when you suddenly get an inspiration. Those, to me are the best kinds of gifts. Gifts that say \"I was thinking about you\" but aren\'t cliche, and don\'t make it a habit- it should always be a surprise!

Anyway that\'s my 2 cents. /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/cool.gif

[MOBLEYC57]

</font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
I did this in the past w/ my ex, and it ended up biting me in the ass...and I told myself I wouldn\'t do it again; but I think I want to.

Just something small, like a 1/2 dozen roses or a small gift given to a girl to show her you were thinking of her. What do you guys think about this, after say 3-4 weeks going out w/ someone? What about suggestions about cheap but good presents that will show her you\'re thinking about her? I could have sworn I saw a thread on this before, but coudln\'t find it.

-Jon

<hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">

Dear Jon,

3 - 4 weeks? /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/crazy.gif Unless, it\'s her birthday...Phone calls, e-mails, notes, a hug, a kiss, a pinch, a nibble, a sniff...they all work fine for the \"You\'ve been on my mind a little bit more than often\" bit. If she request gifts...I once had a lady that told me, \"I want to be romanced, I want a gift for no reason, I want to be swept off my feet.\" My response to that was...\"Me too.\" But if she\'s requesting...give her the pink slip! People always say, \"You\'ll pay for it in one way or another.\" Pleeease! /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smirk.gif If I take someone out to dinner, movie, etc., and they don\'t feel the need to mimick the thoughtfullness...Ciao! Anywho, if you\'re just one of those that feel the only way to show it, is to buy for her...anything from the HEART will do. /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/blush.gif

{I think roses are extremely cliche and if I were to give roses, it would be a single rose of the appropriate color.}

Cliches and something from the heart should not be on the same list. /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/blush.gif I once had a woman that said when a man buys his woman flowers for no reason...he\'s guilty of wrong doings. /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/mad.gif Well, I never gave her flowers! And I like giving flowers to the one that has the power to open and close the valves to me heart. /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/frown.gif Anywho, like me say before...a gift from yer heart, can\'t be bad. /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/cool.gif


If loving you was ice cream...I could be the ice cream man. If loving you was a whole lot of money...I\'d be the richest man in all the land. And if, a bee needed honey...the way that I need you! They wouldn\'t only make it in the summer time...but also in the winter too! Cause I love you! /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/blush.gif

[Whiffy]

</font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
I did this in the past w/ my ex, and it ended up biting me in the ass...and I told myself I wouldn\'t do it again.
-Jon

<hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">

Dude ... we can only help you so much. Don\'t do it. IMO, you haven\'t even been on a real date yet, just hanging out at Amy\'s house and seeing each other in a group setting. I know, I know ... you have an hour here and there before the rest of the gang shows up but that\'s not dating.

Go out just the two of you. Make out like crazy. Get laid if you can. Get laid again. Give her a I-saw-this-on-the-way-over gift at this point. Then get laid again.

Rinse, and repeat. /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tongue.gif

[pelotudo]

LOL. Thanks for the info guys.

We\'ve been out a few times alone, including tonight. Amy told me she is getting really jealous that Tim has been getting her roses, so I decided what I was going to do.

Tonight we went out, had dinner, then got some ice creme and went back toward Amy\'s house. During dinner, I casually brought up how roses were so cliche and everyone does them, and found out that her fav flowers are Lillies and Daisies. I didn\'t mention anything else about it...but tomorrow I\'m going to get a single Lilly or maybe 2 sent to her at work and set up for going out again tomorrow night.

BTW, tonight, mimicked night #2 (for those of u who know what I\'m talking about) ;P. We kept getting interrupted tho, and we\'re planning on continuing tomorrow night if conditions permit. I\'m out, time 4 sleep...

-Jon

BTW, anyone have any good little catch lines I could stick on the small card w/ the flowers? I had a couple, but they sounded shitty...

[MOBLEYC57]

</font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
BTW, anyone have any good little catch lines I could stick on the small card w/ the flowers? I had a couple, but they sounded shitty...

<hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">

(FLOWER/FLOWERS) FOR A FLOWER

HOPING TO CAUSE A DISPLAY OF THAT MILLION DOLLAR SMILE

JUST WANTED TO LET YOU KNOW HOW BEAUTIFUL YOU ARE

HUGS &amp; SUCH

YOU OWE ME! I HAD TO WRESTLE AN ALLIGATOR TO GET (THIS/THESE)!

SMILE! YOU\'RE ON CANDID CAMERA!

YOU GET PAID TO READ CARDS FROM ADMIRERS!?

THERE WERE TWO BEAUTIFUL THINGS ON MY MIND TODAY.

THE OWNER OF THIS CARD IS ENTITLED TO A (DAY/NIGHT/EVENING) OF ROYAL TREATMENT.

WOULD YOU MIND STAYING OUT OF MY THOUGHTS! I HAVE TO (WORK/STUDY/SLEEP)!

IF YOU LIKE ME, MARK (YES) ____ IF YOU DON\'T LIKE ME, MARK (NO) ____

If this doesn\'t help...it may come as a surprise, but it\'s normally the shitty sounding one\'s that they like. /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smirk.gif


I never promised you a rose garden! /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/blush.gif

[EXIT63]

\"You think you hate me now...Wait til you have sex with me\".

\"You think I\'m a homo now...Wait until I\'m pussywhipped\".

\"Can we have sex now...PLEEZE\"!

\"Ummmmmmm.....HUGS\"!

and now for the KICKER!

\"As time goes on
I realize
Just what you mean
To me

And now,
Now that your near,
Promise your love
That I\'ve waited to share
And dream
Of our moments together

Colour my World with Hope
Of Loving You.\"

[pelotudo]

Thanks guys.

This morning I got up and called a few florists to find who had the Gerber Daisies and White Lillies I was looking for. After calling about 5, one had them and I went and picked them up. Jenna called me about 1:10 when she went on break. She was really depressed, b/c her grandmother is in the hospital and she doesn\'t know what is going on. I told her to stay where she was, and went over there. Gave em to her, and she loved them. We sat and talked for a few mins, and went inside Publix to get some OJ, then I left and came back up here. I just got a call from Amy saying how much she loved them and can\'t wait till we go out tonight. Meetin her at Amy\'s place at 4:30, then we\'re going out to drink and downtown for a while. In the words of Jim Carey...

\"It\'s gooooooooooooooooooooooooooood\"

-Jon

Anyone got any Trojans and KY I can borrow? /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif

[elvido]

Who is Jenna? Did you slip up with the names there?
Anyway, it\'s great that it worked out for ya, but I\'d cool it for a while. The whole thing obviously comes off as being very planned (you got her to tell you her fav flowahs). Also you don\'t wanna come off as trying to buy sexual favors from her.

[Whiffy]

Jenna\'s the girl he\'s been writing about for a month now.

Yeah, if you\'re gonna buy sexual favors, don\'t use flowers; Use alcohol.

[pelotudo]

HAH, how right u are Whiff....

How about a combination of both?

&lt;--Just completed Awesome Night Pt. III, and it couldn\'t have gone off ANY better at ALL...but the wet and juicy...and I mean wet, details are going to have to wait till tomorrow. I\'m spent, I need rest and some L-Arginine... Check the Awesome Night thread tomorrow for details.

-Jon

[Elana]

</font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
Dude ... we can only help you so much. Don\'t do it. IMO, you haven\'t even been on a real date yet, just hanging out at Amy\'s house and seeing each other in a group setting. I know, I know ... you have an hour here and there before the rest of the gang shows up but that\'s not dating.

Go out just the two of you. Make out like crazy. Get laid if you can. Get laid again. Give her a I-saw-this-on-the-way-over gift at this point. Then get laid again.

Rinse, and repeat.

<hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">

Jon- I have officially given up on you. I would never \"I told you so.\" I really hope it works out, but........ /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tongue.gif

PLEASE LISTEN TO WHIFFY!

[BassMan]

I love gifts. I love giving them, I love getting them. \"Just because\" gifts are best when they convey the message, \"Hi! I\'ve been paying attention.\" If you need to ask what to give, you\'re not paying attention as closely as you could be.

One way a woman can express her affection for you is to let you see some of the quirky sides of her personality that she doesn\'t let others see. If you are really paying attention, you will find loads of things that resonate. Assuming she\'s beyond surface sensibilities, she\'ll be more impressed with those gifts than with roses.

I keep a shopping bag into which I toss things as I find them. When the bag fills up, I take them to her in \"just look at the strange shyt you inspired\" mode. The laughter and intimacy that ensue will quickly let you know that you are on the correct path.

[CptKipling]

Some just because gifts:

A small box of her favourite chocs

Some scented massage oil (oh yes /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/laugh.gif)

A rule of thum is to be more thoughtfull than materialistic, show that you are paying attention, and get yourself some serious brownie points! /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/cool.gif

But i wouldn\'t give flowers \"just because\", save them for an occasion. If you use the big guns all the time then she will get used to it fast and it wont be so special.