seadove
04-26-2003, 10:14 PM
Q: What do you call a blonde with a dollar bill on her head?
A: All you can eat under a buck.
Q: Why is a blonde like a hardware store?
A: They are both 10¢ a screw!
Q: What is a blonde\'s favorite nursery rhyme?
A: Humpme Dumpme!
Q: What did the blonde\'s right leg say to the left leg?
A: Nothing. They\'ve never met.
A: Between the two of us, we can make a lot of money.
Q: What\'s the mating call of the blonde?
A: \"I\'m *sooo* drunk!\"
Q: What is the mating call of the ugly blonde?
A: (Screaming) \"I said: I\'m drunk!\"
Q: Why do blondes wear green lipstick?
A: Because red means stop.
Q: Why do blondes wear hoop earrings?
A: They have to have some place to rest their ankles.
Q: Why do blondes where big hoop earrings?
A: To put their feet through.
Q: What\'s a brunette\'s mating call?
A: Has that blonde gone yet?
A2: When is that blonde bitch going to leave!?
A3: \"All the blondes have gone home!\"
Q: What do you say to a blonde that won\'t give in?
A: \"Have another beer.\"
Q: Why is a blonde like a door knob?
A: Because everybody gets a turn.
Q: What\'s the difference between a blonde and a Porsche?
A: You don\'t lend the Porsche out to your friend.
Q: What\'s the difference between a blonde and a toothbrush?
A: You don\'t let your best friend borrow your toothbrush.
Q: What is the difference between a blonde and \"The Titanic\"?
A: They know how many men went down on \"The Titanic\".
Q: What\'s the first thing a blonde does in the morning?
A1: Introduces him/her self.
A2: Walks home.
Q: How can you tell when a blonde is dating?
A: By the buckle print on her forehead.
Q: How can you tell who is a blonde\'s boyfriend?
A: He\'s the one with the belt buckle the matches the impression in her forehead.
Q: What two things in the air can get a blonde pregnant?
A: Her feet!
Q: What do blondes and cow-pats have in common?
A: They both get easier to pick-up with age.
Q: What does a screen door and a blonde have in common?
A: The more you bang it, the looser it gets.
Q: What do you call two nuns and a blonde?
A: Two tight ends and a wide receiver.
Q: Why did the blonde cross the road?
A1: Forget the road, what was she doing out of the bedroom!?
A2: I don\'t know.
R: Neither did she.
Q: Why did the blonde smile when she walked the marriage aisle?
A: She realized she gave her last blowjob.
Q: Why did the blonde have a sore navel?
A: Because her boyfriend was also blond!
Q: Why did they call the blonde \"twinkie\"?
A: She liked to be filled with cream.
Did you hear the one about the blonde who thought that \"love handles\" referred to her ears?
Q: What\'s the difference between a blonde and a rooster?
A: In the morning a rooster says, \"Cock\'ll-doodl-doooo\", while a blonde says, \"Any-cock\'ll-doooo.\"
Q: What is the difference between a blonde and the Grand Old Duke of York?
A: The Grand Old Duke of York only \'had\' 10000 men.
Q: Why did the blonde wear condoms on her ears?
A: So she wouldn\'t get Hearing Aides.
Q: What\'s the difference between a prostitute, a nymphomaniac, and a blonde?
A: The prostitute says, \"Aren\'t you done yet?\"
The nympho says, \"Are you done already?\"
The blonde says, \"Beige...I think I\'ll paint the ceiling beige.\"
Q: What\'s the difference between a blonde and a telephone?
A: It costs 30 cents to use a telephone.
Q: What do blondes wear behind their ears to attract men.
A: Their heels.
Confucius say; blonde who fly upside down have crack up.
Q: What does a blonde do if she is not in bed by 10?
A: She picks up her purse and goes home.
A blonde and a brunette were discussing their boyfriends:
Brunette: Last night I had *three* orgasms in a row!
Blonde: That\'s nothing; last night I had over a hundred.
Brunette: My god! I had no idea he was that good.
Blonde: ( looking shocked ) Oh, you mean with one guy.
Q: How do you describe the perfect blonde?
A: 3 feet tall, no teeth, and a flat head to rest your beer on.
Q: Why do blondes have vaginas?
A: So guys will talk to them at parties.
... then there was the blonde who started the restaurant with the slogan \"Billions Served - just today\"
Q: What do blondes do after they comb their hair?
A: They pull up their pants.
Q: Why is 68 the maximum speed for blonds?
A: Because at 69 they blow a rod...
Q: What is the difference between a blonde and a bowling ball?
A: You can only put 3 fingers in a bowling ball.
A: All you can eat under a buck.
Q: Why is a blonde like a hardware store?
A: They are both 10¢ a screw!
Q: What is a blonde\'s favorite nursery rhyme?
A: Humpme Dumpme!
Q: What did the blonde\'s right leg say to the left leg?
A: Nothing. They\'ve never met.
A: Between the two of us, we can make a lot of money.
Q: What\'s the mating call of the blonde?
A: \"I\'m *sooo* drunk!\"
Q: What is the mating call of the ugly blonde?
A: (Screaming) \"I said: I\'m drunk!\"
Q: Why do blondes wear green lipstick?
A: Because red means stop.
Q: Why do blondes wear hoop earrings?
A: They have to have some place to rest their ankles.
Q: Why do blondes where big hoop earrings?
A: To put their feet through.
Q: What\'s a brunette\'s mating call?
A: Has that blonde gone yet?
A2: When is that blonde bitch going to leave!?
A3: \"All the blondes have gone home!\"
Q: What do you say to a blonde that won\'t give in?
A: \"Have another beer.\"
Q: Why is a blonde like a door knob?
A: Because everybody gets a turn.
Q: What\'s the difference between a blonde and a Porsche?
A: You don\'t lend the Porsche out to your friend.
Q: What\'s the difference between a blonde and a toothbrush?
A: You don\'t let your best friend borrow your toothbrush.
Q: What is the difference between a blonde and \"The Titanic\"?
A: They know how many men went down on \"The Titanic\".
Q: What\'s the first thing a blonde does in the morning?
A1: Introduces him/her self.
A2: Walks home.
Q: How can you tell when a blonde is dating?
A: By the buckle print on her forehead.
Q: How can you tell who is a blonde\'s boyfriend?
A: He\'s the one with the belt buckle the matches the impression in her forehead.
Q: What two things in the air can get a blonde pregnant?
A: Her feet!
Q: What do blondes and cow-pats have in common?
A: They both get easier to pick-up with age.
Q: What does a screen door and a blonde have in common?
A: The more you bang it, the looser it gets.
Q: What do you call two nuns and a blonde?
A: Two tight ends and a wide receiver.
Q: Why did the blonde cross the road?
A1: Forget the road, what was she doing out of the bedroom!?
A2: I don\'t know.
R: Neither did she.
Q: Why did the blonde smile when she walked the marriage aisle?
A: She realized she gave her last blowjob.
Q: Why did the blonde have a sore navel?
A: Because her boyfriend was also blond!
Q: Why did they call the blonde \"twinkie\"?
A: She liked to be filled with cream.
Did you hear the one about the blonde who thought that \"love handles\" referred to her ears?
Q: What\'s the difference between a blonde and a rooster?
A: In the morning a rooster says, \"Cock\'ll-doodl-doooo\", while a blonde says, \"Any-cock\'ll-doooo.\"
Q: What is the difference between a blonde and the Grand Old Duke of York?
A: The Grand Old Duke of York only \'had\' 10000 men.
Q: Why did the blonde wear condoms on her ears?
A: So she wouldn\'t get Hearing Aides.
Q: What\'s the difference between a prostitute, a nymphomaniac, and a blonde?
A: The prostitute says, \"Aren\'t you done yet?\"
The nympho says, \"Are you done already?\"
The blonde says, \"Beige...I think I\'ll paint the ceiling beige.\"
Q: What\'s the difference between a blonde and a telephone?
A: It costs 30 cents to use a telephone.
Q: What do blondes wear behind their ears to attract men.
A: Their heels.
Confucius say; blonde who fly upside down have crack up.
Q: What does a blonde do if she is not in bed by 10?
A: She picks up her purse and goes home.
A blonde and a brunette were discussing their boyfriends:
Brunette: Last night I had *three* orgasms in a row!
Blonde: That\'s nothing; last night I had over a hundred.
Brunette: My god! I had no idea he was that good.
Blonde: ( looking shocked ) Oh, you mean with one guy.
Q: How do you describe the perfect blonde?
A: 3 feet tall, no teeth, and a flat head to rest your beer on.
Q: Why do blondes have vaginas?
A: So guys will talk to them at parties.
... then there was the blonde who started the restaurant with the slogan \"Billions Served - just today\"
Q: What do blondes do after they comb their hair?
A: They pull up their pants.
Q: Why is 68 the maximum speed for blonds?
A: Because at 69 they blow a rod...
Q: What is the difference between a blonde and a bowling ball?
A: You can only put 3 fingers in a bowling ball.