seadove
04-15-2003, 12:17 AM
A little male bashing especially for you girls. /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/laugh.gif
Enjoy. /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif
Q: Why do men become smarter during sex?
A: Because they are plugged into a genius.
Q: Why don\'t women blink during foreplay?
A: They don\'t have time.
Q: Why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilize 1 egg?
A: They won\'t stop for directions.
Q: Why did God put men on earth?
A: Because a vibrator can\'t mow the lawn.
Q: Why don\'t women have men\'s brains?
A: Because they don\'t have penises to put them in.
Q: What do electric trains and breasts have in common?
A: They\'re intended for children, but it\'s the men who usually end up playing with them.
Q: Why do men snore when they lay on their backs?
A: Because their balls fall over their assholes and they vapor lock.
Q: Why do men masturbate?
A: It\'s sex with someone they love.
Q: Why were men given larger brains than dogs?
A: So they won\'t hump women\'s legs at cocktail parties.
Q: Why did God make men before women?
A: You need a rough draft before you have a final copy.
Q: Why is a man\'s pee yellow and his sperm white?
A: So he can tell if he is coming or going.
Q: How many men does it take to put the toilet seat down?
A: Nobody knows, it hasn\'t happened yet.
Q: What is the thinnest book in the world?
A: What men know about women.
Q: How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: One. Men will screw anything.
Q: How does a man take a bubble bath?
A: He eats beans for dinner.
Q: What\'s a man\'s idea of foreplay?
A: A half hour of begging.
Q: How can you tell if a man is sexually aroused?
A: He\'s breathing
Q: What\'s the difference between men and government bonds?
A: Government bonds mature.
Q: How do you save a man from drowning?
A: Take your foot off of his head.
Q: What do men an beer bottle have in common?
A: They are both empty from the head up.
Q: How can you tell if a man is happy?
A: Who cares?
Q: How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
A: We don\'t know. It\'s never happened.
Q: How are men and parking spots alike?
A: The good ones are always taken and the only ones left are handicapped.
Q: What is a man\'s idea of helping out with housework?
A: Lifting his leg so you can vacuum.
/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/cool.gif /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/cool.gif /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/cool.gif /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/cool.gif /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/cool.gif
Enjoy. /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif
Q: Why do men become smarter during sex?
A: Because they are plugged into a genius.
Q: Why don\'t women blink during foreplay?
A: They don\'t have time.
Q: Why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilize 1 egg?
A: They won\'t stop for directions.
Q: Why did God put men on earth?
A: Because a vibrator can\'t mow the lawn.
Q: Why don\'t women have men\'s brains?
A: Because they don\'t have penises to put them in.
Q: What do electric trains and breasts have in common?
A: They\'re intended for children, but it\'s the men who usually end up playing with them.
Q: Why do men snore when they lay on their backs?
A: Because their balls fall over their assholes and they vapor lock.
Q: Why do men masturbate?
A: It\'s sex with someone they love.
Q: Why were men given larger brains than dogs?
A: So they won\'t hump women\'s legs at cocktail parties.
Q: Why did God make men before women?
A: You need a rough draft before you have a final copy.
Q: Why is a man\'s pee yellow and his sperm white?
A: So he can tell if he is coming or going.
Q: How many men does it take to put the toilet seat down?
A: Nobody knows, it hasn\'t happened yet.
Q: What is the thinnest book in the world?
A: What men know about women.
Q: How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: One. Men will screw anything.
Q: How does a man take a bubble bath?
A: He eats beans for dinner.
Q: What\'s a man\'s idea of foreplay?
A: A half hour of begging.
Q: How can you tell if a man is sexually aroused?
A: He\'s breathing
Q: What\'s the difference between men and government bonds?
A: Government bonds mature.
Q: How do you save a man from drowning?
A: Take your foot off of his head.
Q: What do men an beer bottle have in common?
A: They are both empty from the head up.
Q: How can you tell if a man is happy?
A: Who cares?
Q: How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
A: We don\'t know. It\'s never happened.
Q: How are men and parking spots alike?
A: The good ones are always taken and the only ones left are handicapped.
Q: What is a man\'s idea of helping out with housework?
A: Lifting his leg so you can vacuum.
/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/cool.gif /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/cool.gif /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/cool.gif /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/cool.gif /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/cool.gif