The "I'm feeling hot" reaction from -none

[bivonic]

When you are wearing a large concentration of -none (bordering on OD), and you are near a woman you know & she says to you or just out in general maybe not even making eye contact with you that she\'s feeling hot. Do you take this as a positive or negative hit? It\'s happened to me twice to two attractive girls I know. The first time I joked around with her & I said, well that\'s because I\'m here. Got a laugh out of her, but not much else. The second time it was my friend, she just showed up from out in the cold & came inside & took her jacket off, she said it like 2-3 times, \"I\'m hot. I\'m hot,\" almost in an angry tone. To which I replied, \"What do I keep telling you?\" and she looks at me a little puzzled & I said, \"You are ...\" & I just lip synched the \"hot\" part so that she wouldn\'t think I was coming on to her too hard. She laughed & then walked away.

I\'m starting to think, if they only feel the heat but not the passion, then they are not in the right mindset, or at least they are not receptive to you. Make sense?

[**DONOTDELETE**]

They just don\'t realize what\'s happening to them. You have to remember, our genitals are internal so we can\'t see them. It\'s not like with a guy who gets a hard on and knows he has a hard on. We can be physically aroused and not realize it for quite awhile, especially when it\'s coming from an invisible stimulous.

[bivonic]

Hmmm, so what is a good follow up, when I think they are getting turned on? Am I off base in thinking women could either be \"in the mood\" to get turned on or \"not in the mood\"? Obviously men are always in \"the mood.\" The other option is that they are getting turned on & as you suggest, they don\'t know what or who is turning them on, they know I am there, but dismiss me as the possible stimulus? I\'m starting to lean towards this, but it just sounds like a defeatist attitude.

What\'s interesting is after we had this dialog when I told her \"You are\" h-o-t, she started telling me about her boyfriend & how they\'ll hang out sometimes & he\'ll say to her how he thinks that girl over there is hot & she will tell him, \"Go for it.\" and then he\'ll actually go leave her to go hit on the girl. I asked her how she felt about that, & she said, \"she was okay with it\" but her body language seemed to think otherwise (add to the fact I know how jealous & angry she gets when I hit on other girls & there\'s no romance between us). I was drunk <my downfall I\'m realizing> & I tried to get her to open up & tell me it was a two way street, meaning they had an open relationship & they could date freely. But I really bobbled the delivery & I wasn\'t successful in trying to beat around the bush & get a straight answer out of her without being too forward. It left her confused.

That whole conversation I thought was kind of odd, I thought it might have been the A1 I had in my hair gel in combination with the SOE I had on my face, that triggered that behavior & openness from her. That\'s when she walked away (she was collecting cover charges as customers entered) & I got the hint it was my time to meander off, so as I\'m walking away she says, \"Come back later & keep me company.\" (But I think that was more of a blow off more then anything) So I go & hang out with some of my friends & hit on a few more girls with mild success, I caught one okay looking girl checking me out & had no interest approaching her, but she ended up approaching me so I chatted with her a bit before I walked away. When I eventually returned to the one collecting the money I got a pretty negative response, I was drinking some water & asked her if she wanted some & she said, that\'s not water! I said yes it was try smelling it, she didn\'t smell any alcohol & said \"there\'s a lime in it, it\'s not water!\" & turned her back to me, even though there were no customers waiting to get in. So that was my cue to take off, I wasn\'t in the mood to put up with this & didn\'t see much available eye candy so I split.

[SonnyBlack]

maybe the Soe you were wearing on your face began to convert into none which made her see you as threatning later on in the night...

[Elana]

or maybe she was feeling warm. /ubbthreads/images/icons/crazy.gif
why do we always gloss over the obvious?

[SonnyBlack]

hehe thats also very true...

[bivonic]

I doubt she was feeling warm, like I said she had just gotten inside from the freezing cold outside, she took off her coat & after the pleasantries of talking with me she said that. She was wearing a tank top with a short sleeve shirt draped over it (not buttoned) with like an irise ribbon on top of that. Next time I\'ll grab her forearm for confirmation, since if her arm is cold there\'s no way she is warm.

I was wearing very close to OD amounts of -none, so there was no need of the -nol to -none conversion to be the factor /ubbthreads/images/icons/smile.gif That might have caused the negative response as well. To top it all off I think it\'s her time of the month (it\'s usually at the end of the month with her). Too many variables...

[**DONOTDELETE**]

Lord, Bivonic.

\"Am I off base in thinking women could either be \"in the mood\" to get turned on or \"not in the mood\"? \"
Yes, that is off base.

\"The other option is that they are getting turned on & as you suggest, they don\'t know what or who is turning them on, they know I am there, but dismiss me as the possible stimulus?\"
Why would I lie to you.

\"I\'m starting to lean towards this, but it just sounds like a defeatist attitude. \"
Jesus jumping christ, what\'s defeatist about that? You\'ve got a girl near you who\'s turned on. This is a plus. Now you have to learn to work it.

\"What\'s interesting is after we had this dialog when I told her \"You are\" h-o-t, she started telling me about her boyfriend & how they\'ll hang out sometimes & he\'ll say to her how he thinks that girl over there is hot & she will tell him, \"Go for it.\" and then he\'ll actually go leave her to go hit on the girl. I asked her how she felt about that, & she said, \"she was okay with it\" but her body language seemed to think otherwise (add to the fact I know how jealous & angry she gets when I hit on other girls & there\'s no romance between us). \"
She hates his guts for it and it keeps her awake at night, bet on it.

\"I was drunk <my downfall I\'m realizing> & I tried to get her to open up & tell me it was a two way street, meaning they had an open relationship & they could date freely. But I really bobbled the delivery & I wasn\'t successful in trying to beat around the bush & get a straight answer out of her without being too forward. It left her confused. \"
Well, yeah, since what you should have been doing was saying, in response to her body language about the situation she described, \"You\'re kidding! That\'s so rude. That would bother me a lot. I think I would really mind that if a girl I was with not only TOLD me she wanted to check out other guys, but actually went and did it in front of my face. Wow. \" (which is to say, I\'m better than that jerk, I can read your body language, it\'s not ok with you, and I would never do such a thing, so pick me)

\"That whole conversation I thought was kind of odd, I thought it might have been the A1 I had in my hair gel in combination with the SOE I had on my face, that triggered that behavior & openness from her. \"
Well, it wasn\'t your finesse, let\'s put it that way. /ubbthreads/images/icons/laugh.gif

That\'s when she walked away (she was collecting cover charges as customers entered) & I got the hint it was my time to meander off, so as I\'m walking away she says, \"Come back later & keep me company.\" (But I think that was more of a blow off more then anything)
Yes, because why assume a girl would actually want you to hang out with her? DOOFUS. I think she meant what she said. And you walked off.

\"So I go & hang out with some of my friends & hit on a few more girls with mild success, I caught one okay looking girl checking me out & had no interest approaching her, but she ended up approaching me so I chatted with her a bit before I walked away. When I eventually returned to the one collecting the money I got a pretty negative response, I was drinking some water & asked her if she wanted some & she said, that\'s not water! I said yes it was try smelling it, she didn\'t smell any alcohol & said \"there\'s a lime in it, it\'s not water!\" & turned her back to me, even though there were no customers waiting to get in. So that was my cue to take off, I wasn\'t in the mood to put up with this & didn\'t see much available eye candy so I split. \"
Why should she speak to you at all, much less drink anything you offered to her, what with your drunk ass backspit probably all in it and she\'s mad at you anyway for rejecting her.

Bivonic. Honest to god. That you get laid at all is a marvel to me.

[SonnyBlack]

see there you go defending females at all costs and looking ridiculous at the same time and making good stand up guys like bivonic feel bad...why is it weird that he gets laid??Just because he doesnt seduce ladies the way you see fit??I dont know I mean im only 22 yrs old, but maybe I missed that book that you wrote on the proper way to seduce females that seems to give you the expertise you seem to think you posses in this area...I mean just because you hang around this forum all day long posting while the rest of us are out seeing something else other than our computer screens doesnt make you any more knowledgable..Bivonic..keep your head up bro...you did nothing wrong...

[Elana]

Sonny- FTR is just telling Bivonic that he missed all of the signs. She is saying that it is so obvious that this girl wanted him, but he let the opportunity pass him by.

[**DONOTDELETE**]

Sonny, Bivonic\'s a big boy, he can take it. /ubbthreads/images/icons/smile.gif

[franki]

FTR is right.

I think Bivonic thinks too much. When a girl says she is hot, and you are the only guy around, why bother with that stuff??

Franki /ubbthreads/images/icons/tongue.gif

[bivonic]

LOL - thanks for standing up for me Sonny, but in all honesty I wasn\'t totally insulted with what FTR had to say & I got some good advice from it.

I wasn\'t in a good mood to begin the evening, I had just come from a party & then every single bar in my town had a line, I thought going to my local watering hole would be a breeze getting in, but it turns out this scum bag bouncer working the door had no respect for me & made me & my roommate wait in line. I had to wait for the owner to come outside for a smoke so we chatted & he brought me in. Not to mention another girl I know that works at the bar came out to get a head count of those in line & I said hi to her & she said hi back but refused to hook me up to get me inside. I can\'t stand bar politics & my view of these two individuals were greatly reduced. I already didn\'t have a high opinion of the bartender & this just reinforced it.

Regarding the whole blow off & water thing, I know it was a blow off line as she\'s said it to me a million times, this time it was out of courtesy as she walked away, as in - \"I don\'t want to continue talking to you now but feel free to check back with me later.\" Also regarding the water, I had just got it from the bar, nearby her & had not drank out of it, but you didn\'t know that either, so no harm. I do appreciate the frank feedback. /ubbthreads/images/icons/smile.gif

[**DONOTDELETE**]

What you say about the courtesy line makes sense. And I was only teasing about the backspit. /ubbthreads/images/icons/smile.gif
Peace and love,
ftr

[Elana]

Come here Sonny...FTR...Bivonic....big group hug /ubbthreads/images/icons/smile.gif
Now let\'s all go have sex and forget this ever happened.

[bivonic]

Meet you around back, make sure you are not wearing your panties or I will have to punish you! /ubbthreads/images/icons/mad.gif /ubbthreads/images/icons/shocked.gif

[Elana]

No problem....I never have any on

[**DONOTDELETE**]

And I like to be punished...

[SonnyBlack]

once again Elana youve managed to cheer me up...thanks honey...

[Elana]

You know what I want for payment /ubbthreads/images/icons/wink.gif
I hope you know that I will never leave you alone until I get what I want /ubbthreads/images/icons/laugh.gif

[SonnyBlack]

the search for a scanner has begun...hmm maybe I should just buy me one and get it over with......

[**DONOTDELETE**]

To borrow a line from Big B ...

PICS?

[SonnyBlack]

Ill hook you up as well whenevr I get them out to Elana...

[franki]

Sonny, you are making it too easy for Elana. Play hard to get (ask CJ what that means).

Franki /ubbthreads/images/icons/smile.gif

[Elana]

Trust me....he is not making it easy. I have been bugging him for weeks. /ubbthreads/images/icons/smile.gif