Please help FTRH! Receptive vs agressive sex drive

[Irish]

I was reading Theresa Crenshaw\'s excellent book \'Alchemy of Love and Lust\' lately. I highly commend it - she\'s a medical doctor with a great take on how hormones influence our sexual behavior throughout life. The chapters on aggressive and receptive sex drive alone are worth the price of the book. She also had a good handle on pheromones, esp. given that the book was written several years ago.

Anyway, the book was discussing the four shades of sex drive in women, vs. the one shade for men, and how shifting hormone patterns during a woman\'s cycle can affect that. She mentioned an aggressive drive, focused on orgasms and often culminating in masturbation. She also discussed a receptive drive characterized by a desire to be held, penetrated - a \'feminine\' drive powered by estrogen peaks. (the book also deals with \'seductive\' drive and \'aversive\' drive).

Anyway, that\'s where I need the help. I seem to remember a post, on the women\'s forum?, where someone described two of those differences in sex drive from personal experience. She were talking about an intense sex drive that was focused on orgasm/masturbation, being different from a more\'receptive\' state where she was open to a man\'s sexual attention. The post seemed to track with what Crenshaw was writing about, and I\'d like to re-read that post. If I could find it. I don\'t know what word to search on! Please help if you remember the post I\'m talking about.

Thanks!

[Elana]

I have a feeling that the post you are looking for was by \"Woman\"

The word \"pliable\" was used. Try doing a search for that word

[**DONOTDELETE**]

Yeah, Elana\'s right. That was a Woman post, talking about how EW puts her in receptive mode.

[Irish]

Thanks ladies - much appreciated.

If you get a chance to pick up Crenshaw\'s book let me know what you think. She explained a lot of male-female behavior differences to me in a meaningful and understandable way. She also has good insight into the aging and phase-of-life side of things - the book exceeds its title by a long shot.

Thanks again.

[Elana]

That book is also out on cassette for the lazy. /ubbthreads/images/icons/smile.gif

[Irish]

Looking at that thread I see the book was already mentioned! Apparently great minds think alike - mine just needs a little more time to catch up!

[Whitehall]

Irish,

I\'ve been thumping this book for years on this forum. Guess you never read my posts.

[Elana]

or his PM\'s /ubbthreads/images/icons/laugh.gif

[**DONOTDELETE**]

!!

If Whitehall gets ignored, too, then I\'m pacified.

[Blackwidow_Woman]

Ok so what do you do when you are not only to receptive but way to overly agressive???

[**DONOTDELETE**]

BWWoman, you talkin\' to me?

[Blackwidow_Woman]

Well not just you but others as well..just asking thats all...but yeah im overly receptive and agressive and you could say even posessive...sex feen???uuummm mabye...hehehehe!

[**DONOTDELETE**]

I\'ll tell you the truth, and I wonder if you\'ve come to the same conclusion. To get both sides of your sex drive satisfied, you really need two different guys. I can\'t find one who can really shift gears the way I\'d like. The one I\'ve got now\'s great for when I\'m in aggressive mode -- but I\'ve got to be in that mode or it\'s not going to work. I met a man a year or so ago who was perfect for when I\'m in receptive mode - that didn\'t work out, too many logistical problems -- but they are two completely different kinds of guys.

You have that problem?

[Elana]

I certainly don\'t have that problem, because I never shift out of my aggressive gear.

[Wolfe]

OMG, i\'m NOT gonna ask /ubbthreads/images/icons/smile.gif

[**DONOTDELETE**]

I do. I\'ve got several different modes. Only one itch ever really gets scratched.

Ok, enough about my sorry-ass love life ...

[Elana]

You need a three-some

[**DONOTDELETE**]

No, thank you. You\'re joking, right?

[Elana]

Nope...Two hot men. Never tried it?

[**DONOTDELETE**]

Yeah, a couple of times, women too. I don\'t like threesomes at all. The other person is a distraction. I\'ve tried. I hate it. I won\'t do it anymore.

[Wolfe]

good grief, i KNEW i should have left this thread alone..lol
shower time

[Elana]

I could see it being a huge distraction with another woman, but with two men...it\'s something every woman should do at least once in her life.

[**DONOTDELETE**]

You had two better men than I had, then. I\'ve never had an orgasm in a threesome. It\'s just a waste of time. I can\'t concentrate with that much going on. It irritates me. Just a waste of good money on a hotel room.

Two different guys, each by himself. That would be good.

[Elana]

I was lucky. I had two very skilled men.

<Two different guys, each by himself. That would be good.>

Sounds wonderful /ubbthreads/images/icons/smile.gif

[Wolfe]

think i better make that a COLD shower

[Gerund]

I just KNEW I wasn\'t living life in the fast lane! /ubbthreads/images/icons/wink.gif