MOBLEYC57
12-28-2002, 02:34 PM
Twas the month after New Year\'s, and all through the house
Nothing would fit me, not even a blouse.
The cookies I\'d nibbled, the eggnog I\'d taste
At the holiday parties had gone to my waist.
When I got on the scales there arose such a number!
When I walked to the store (less a walk than a lumber).
I\'d remember the marvelous meals I\'d prepared;
The gravies and sauces and beef nicely rared,
The wine and the rum balls, the bread and the cheese
And the way I\'d never said, \"No thank you, please.\"
As I dressed myself in my husband\'s old shirt
And prepared once again to do battle with dirt---
I said to myself, as I only can
\"You can\'t spend a winter disguised as a man!\"
So--away with the last of the sour cream dip,
Get rid of the fruit cake, every cracker and chip
Every last bit of food that I like must be banished
\'Till all the additional ounces have vanished.
I won\'t have a cookie--not even a lick.
I\'ll want only to chew on a long celery stick.
I won\'t have hot biscuits, or corn bread, or pie,
I\'ll munch on a carrot and quietly cry.
I\'m hungry, I\'m lonesome, and life is a bore---
But isn\'t that what January is for?
Unable to giggle, no longer a riot.
Happy New Year to all and to all a good diet!
BE CAREFUL OUT THERE!!!
Nothing would fit me, not even a blouse.
The cookies I\'d nibbled, the eggnog I\'d taste
At the holiday parties had gone to my waist.
When I got on the scales there arose such a number!
When I walked to the store (less a walk than a lumber).
I\'d remember the marvelous meals I\'d prepared;
The gravies and sauces and beef nicely rared,
The wine and the rum balls, the bread and the cheese
And the way I\'d never said, \"No thank you, please.\"
As I dressed myself in my husband\'s old shirt
And prepared once again to do battle with dirt---
I said to myself, as I only can
\"You can\'t spend a winter disguised as a man!\"
So--away with the last of the sour cream dip,
Get rid of the fruit cake, every cracker and chip
Every last bit of food that I like must be banished
\'Till all the additional ounces have vanished.
I won\'t have a cookie--not even a lick.
I\'ll want only to chew on a long celery stick.
I won\'t have hot biscuits, or corn bread, or pie,
I\'ll munch on a carrot and quietly cry.
I\'m hungry, I\'m lonesome, and life is a bore---
But isn\'t that what January is for?
Unable to giggle, no longer a riot.
Happy New Year to all and to all a good diet!
BE CAREFUL OUT THERE!!!