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View Full Version : What to do/say when you get alot of eye contact?



angelgarcia1989
01-03-2008, 11:02 AM
I have been using mones for years and what i noticed is have received ALOT more eye contact

with them sometimes too much , even to the point where i have to look away or it seems like we are staring at each

other. And I don't want to seem like a weirdo.
Does anyone have any comebacks/jokes or anything they say when a

girl keeps staring into your eyes for a while?

Thanks,
Angel

Mtnjim
01-03-2008, 11:33 AM
Uhmmm! Have you tried

"Hi!"??:blink:

Bruce
01-03-2008, 11:50 AM
I used to have the same problem, big

time. Terminal shyness. Now I'm married with 3 kids and don't worry about it. I just smile, sometimes say "hi"

and keep moving, but probably if I were single and on the prowl again, I would freeze up again. I have some

incredible stories about the 'fish who tried to jump in the bucket, but I couldn't hold it still enough'

OK,

the advice.... Yeah, just bite the bullet, smile and say "hi". Maybe it will develop, maybe it won't, but there is

only one way to find out.

angelgarcia1989
01-03-2008, 01:18 PM
Sorry I guess I should

have emphasized a little bit more:frustrate. I was talking more about when i'm already in a conversation talking

with a girl, for example this girl I know always seems to look straight into my eyes when im talking and when I stop

talking. I dont want to make her uncomfortable by staring at her when im talking with her, so I usually look into

her eyes when talking then look down or to the side.

But when i look back at her she is there still staring

straight into my eyes and is still doing it even after I finish what I was saying which sometimes is very awkward

and we end up in uncomfortable silences.

Is this normal maybe she likes me, but yet she already has a boyfriend

sooo.....

I just wanted something funny/witty to say so we wont have those awkward moments.


Thanks,
Angel

Mtnjim
01-03-2008, 01:22 PM
So this is one particular person

you already know, not a bunch of random people??

angelgarcia1989
01-03-2008, 01:26 PM
So

this is one particular person you already know, not a bunch of random people??

yes, I have known her for

about a full school semester now. i noticed most people do the same thing I do (look to the side/down) when in

conversations to not make me or other people uncomfortable, but she doesn't do that much. I guess maybe thats how

she is?

Mtnjim
01-03-2008, 03:10 PM
...I

guess maybe thats how she is?

Sounds like it.

As an experiment, you might try holdng eye contact--no

matter what---until she breaks it, just to see what happens.

Rbt
01-03-2008, 05:30 PM
Maybe find some other activity going

on nearby that you can direct the attention/conversation to. Like "hey look at that going on over there. What's

with that?" Or watch and comment about some other person's, animal's, or raindrop's behavior. Get her to

watch/look at something else and engage her in conversation about that. Like watching a move and making running

commentary type thing.

Or bring a prop of some sort to look at. Pictures in a magazine, on your MP3 "digital

media player" thing, etc. Learn a few magic tricks, whatever. Get her looking somewhere else but tie it into the

conversation you are having.

Just some thoughts.

idesign
01-03-2008, 06:18 PM
Holding eye contact can be very

sexy if you have a smile in your eyes. Its touchy, don't be threatening. Make her comfortable. Acknowledge the

stare, and make it a welcome thing.

sgcliques
01-04-2008, 01:03 PM
which mones u using?

angelgarcia1989
01-04-2008, 04:35 PM
which mones u using?

Well I was just using AFA for awhile, but I just recently

bought AE and some TE gel packs and I will try those out next week after Christmas break.

MOBLEYC57
01-04-2008, 07:57 PM
Sorry I guess I should have emphasized a little bit more:frustrate. I was talking

more about when i'm already in a conversation talking with a girl, for example this girl I know always seems to

look straight into my eyes when im talking and when I stop talking. I dont want to make her uncomfortable by

staring at her when im talking with her, so I usually look into her eyes when talking then look down or to the

side.

But when i look back at her she is there still staring straight into my eyes and is still doing it

even after I finish what I was saying which sometimes is very awkward and we end up in uncomfortable silences.



Is this normal maybe she likes me, but yet she already has a boyfriend sooo.....

I just wanted something

funny/witty to say so we wont have those awkward moments.


Thanks,
Angel

First bold section:

Characteristics of a DOMINANT woman.

Second bold section: Characteristics of a SUBMISSIVE man.



I reserve all rights to be wrong! \o/ :run:

angelgarcia1989
01-04-2008, 08:15 PM
First bold section: Characteristics of a DOMINANT woman.

Second bold section:

Characteristics of a SUBMISSIVE man.

I reserve all rights to be wrong! \o/ :run:


I guess

she might be, how do dominant types act?

CptKipling
01-05-2008, 08:35 AM
First of all its fine, and very

useful, to think about this kind of stuff now. Just make sure that when your actually interacting with people you

are much less "in your head" and are instead just flowing. If you start trying to micromanage your self like that

the chances are that she'll think you're uncomfortable (which you are, right?).

Even here:


I dont

want to make her uncomfortable by staring at her when im talking with her, so I usually look into her eyes when

talking then look down or to the side.

You are thinking too much.

HOWEVER, a general rule is that you

should try to be the last person to break eye contact. Your probably worried that you're going to come across as

creepy or something, but again you're thinking too much. Subconsciously you already know when you've gone too far,

so just let things flow. It's GREAT that she makes a lot of eye contact because this is awesome for building and

manipulating sexual tension. Also, as Mobes points out to look down is *supposedly* an act of submission (NEVER good

if your a man in your average conversation, 99% of the time women want a dominant man to sleep with). After

reading that years ago I found myself breaking eye contact by looking up and too the side when remembering some

something or whatever. Does this make a big difference? No idea! But it feels right and I know that generally I'm

the dominant one in my interactions.

koolking1
01-05-2008, 09:23 AM
wow - you'd have to wonder

why she does that. Maybe she's trying to make you fall in love with her, would that be to your liking? If so,

I'd go for it.

Sue and I went out to eat at a new diner here in town last week, won't go back as the food

was dismal. At any rate, a family of three came in and sat at a table behind us. The woman was younger, attractive

and a bit curvy. Our eyes locked for a bit and she wasn't about to let go but I did have to turn away as I was

afraid that Sue might have caught on and I sure don't want to annoy her. I didn't look down but more to the side.

I wonder what kind of body language that is??? BTW, no mones on. I tend not to wear them when it's 2 degrees F

outside.

MOBLEYC57
01-05-2008, 09:49 AM
My bet would be that either

she's dominant or already in love. You looking back into her eyes is not a bad thing ... as long as you can produce

a tad bit of a smile instead of looking like you're about to kill her or yourself. :sick:

Like the Capitano

said, hi Cap! ... you're thinking too much, and that mostly leads to bad/wrong decisions/answers. For some reason,

when humans filter things, they tend to go with the negative answer instead of the positive. Wonder why that is?

:drunk:

angelgarcia1989
01-05-2008, 11:42 AM
I actually thought i was

the dominant one, since she is always asking me for advice (she always makes it seem like she needs help). Really I

never thought too much about the eye contact thing until when one day I think I looked at her a little too long and

she said "why am I giving her the look" of course she said it with a smile. She kept saying that all

period long even when I looked at her for about 2 seconds! i think she was just flirting with me though.

Now back

to me being the dominant one, some of my friends have told me they were intimidated by me when they first saw me or

met me, as well as other people I barley know(Too much mones I guess, i barely found out about ODs on this Site!).

Anyway I think she sees me as person she looks up to, she always tells me her problems then just waits for me to

come up with a solution.

koolking1
01-05-2008, 12:12 PM
go for it or

not?

angelgarcia1989
01-05-2008, 12:38 PM
go for it or not?

She already has a boyfriend, and I actually convinced her to

break up with her old one to go out with her new one.

Pendragon
01-05-2008, 03:46 PM
Not meaning to rain on the

parade.
Although (from experience...) being that involved with a woman's life and not dating her. You may hear

something along the lines of "your such a nice guy. why ruin our special friendship" or simiilar impression that

your considered more her brother than a dating prospect.

angelgarcia1989
01-05-2008, 04:14 PM
Not meaning to rain on the parade.
Although (from experience...) being that involved with

a woman's life and not dating her. You may hear something along the lines of "your such a nice guy. why ruin our

special friendship" or simiilar impression that your considered more her brother than a dating

prospect.

I'm guessing thats it, maybe she looks up to me like a big brother? Though she has told me she

wishes her boyfriend was more like me.

Pendragon
01-05-2008, 04:25 PM
I don't mean it to discourage

you. Stick in there. Either she'll remain a real good friend ro it may turn into something more later on.



Having close lady friends is always good for honest advice and setting you up with their friends.

idesign
01-05-2008, 05:11 PM
First

of all its fine, and very useful, to think about this kind of stuff now. Just make sure that when your actually

interacting with people you are much less "in your head" and are instead just flowing. If you start trying to

micromanage your self like that the chances are that she'll think you're uncomfortable (which you are,

right?).

Could not agree more. Building also on the other responses I think that you should just play it

naturally and let the dynamics play themselves out. I'm one that figures a good female friend is a nice thing to

have, it isn't always about sex.

I think a woman will stare if she's attracted to you, or she's a control

drone. Its easy enough to tell the difference. I think this girl likes you.

angelgarcia1989
01-05-2008, 05:54 PM
Could not agree more. Building also on the other responses I think that you should just play

it naturally and let the dynamics play themselves out. I'm one that figures a good female friend is a nice

thing to have, it isn't always about sex.

I think a woman will stare if she's attracted to you, or she's

a control drone. Its easy enough to tell the difference. I think this girl likes you.

Yep, me too

CptKipling
01-07-2008, 06:38 PM
What do you want with this

girl? Sorry if I've missed that in the thread...but even if she has a boyfriend and you and her are friends there

is nothing wrong with being honest about what you want. I'm going to assume that you like her because, well, it's

much more fun that way :D


I actually thought i was the dominant one, since she is

always asking me for advice (she always makes it seem like she needs help).

Seems to me as though she

isn't domineering and even necessarily dominant here, but rather she wants a man that leads strongly. Btw the

reason why good eye contact is a sign of dominance is that to lock eyes with someone creates a lot of tension (even

as part of an apparently neutral conversation there are subtle interplays of tension), and your ability to deal with

that tension and then to manipulate it are indicators of your social experience and

status.


Really I never thought too much about the eye contact thing until when one day I

think I looked at her a little too long and she said "why am I giving her

the look" of course she said it with a smile. She kept saying that all

period long even when I looked at her for about 2 seconds! i think she was just flirting with me

though.

I'd say she was flirting too. You should have definitely said something about the way she was

looking at you! "This look?! No this is me wondering why your looking at me like I'm the tastiest chocolate cake

you've ever seen!" ...or whatever, consider something actually funny ;)



She

already has a boyfriend, and I actually convinced her to break up with her old one to go out with her new

one.

Do you like this girl? If so that was silly :)


Anyway I think she sees me

as person she looks up to, she always tells me her problems then just waits for me to come up with a

solution.


I'm guessing thats it, maybe she looks up to me like a big

brother? Though she has told me she wishes her boyfriend was more like me.

As Pendragon mentioned this is

dodgy territory. It's possible that she sees you as the typical shoulder-to-cry-on nice guy.

However, as I

mentioned, eye contact builds tension and she is clearly comfortable with this happening with you. Also, what I

highlighted in red is a clear response to your eye contact

triggering sexual tension/attraction. Think about it! Even if she couldn't allow herself to escalate she would have

had to feel the emotion to describe it like that, as "THE look".

Btw none of this is advice as such, because I

don't know either of you or your particular relationship.

Having said that, I think you like her and if I were

you I'd go for it :hammer: :D



Hi Mobes!

BGuy20
01-16-2008, 02:19 PM
I agree about the eye contact

thing. Holding eye contact longer is a sign of being alpha, so it's almost always better to hold it longer. Just

make sure you don't have a Wes-Bentley-in-American-Beauty creepy look while you're doing it. A playful smile is

probably best.

I'd be careful since she's already in a relationship. I would probably say something to the

effect of "if your feelings aren't in a relationship, it's unfair to you and the other person" since she seems to

be suggesting that she'd rather be with you ("I wish my BF was more like you") and it's not a big brother thing.

If you'd like to have a chance with her, try to be abstract about the relationship so she can be the one who

decides to end it (if she even so decides) instead of thinking it was you. I'd advise against being honest about

what you want if she's in a relationship. The odds of you wrecking things are greater than if you play esoteric

relationship advice guy.

Good luck with this one, I can see many ways in which it could end badly.

xvs
01-23-2008, 07:35 AM
She's hoping you'll kiss her.



It's as simple as that.

Seriously.


Sorry I guess I should have

emphasized a little bit more:frustrate. I was talking more about when i'm already in a conversation talking with a

girl, for example this girl I know always seems to look straight into my eyes when im talking and when I stop

talking. I dont want to make her uncomfortable by staring at her when im talking with her, so I usually look into

her eyes when talking then look down or to the side.

But when i look back at her she is there still staring

straight into my eyes and is still doing it even after I finish what I was saying which sometimes is very awkward

and we end up in uncomfortable silences.

Is this normal maybe she likes me, but yet she already has a

boyfriend sooo.....

I just wanted something funny/witty to say so we wont have those awkward

moments.


Thanks,
Angel