belgareth
02-13-2007, 05:30 AM
Ever wondered what happens when
Hallmark writers are having a bad
day........
[/C
OLOR][/FON
T]
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My tire was thumping.
I thought it was flat
When I looked at the tire...
I noticed
your cat.
Sorry!
[
FONT=Times New
Roman]
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~
Heard your wife left you,
How upset you must be .
But don't fret about it...
She
moved in with me.
[
FONT=Times New
Roman]
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~
Looking back over the years
that we've been together,
I can't help but wonder...
"What the hell was I thinking?"
[
FONT=Times New
Roman][/FONT]
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~
[CE
NTER]Congratulations on your wedding day!
Too bad no one likes your husband.
[/CENTER]
[
FONT=Times New
Roman][/FONT]
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~
How could two people as beautiful as you
Have such an ugly baby?
[
FONT=Times New
Roman][/FONT]
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~
I've always wanted to have
someone to hold,
someone to love.
After having met you ..
I've changed my mind.
[
FONT=Times New
Roman]
[F
ONT=Arial]--------------------------------------
-----------------------
-----------------------------------[/FONT][C
OLOR=black]
I must admit, you brought Religion into my life.
I never believed in Hell until I met you.
[
FONT=Times New
Roman][/FONT]
/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
/////////[F
ONT=Arial]
[/FONT]
As the days go by, I think of how lucky I am...
That you're not here to ruin it for me.
[
FONT=Times New
Roman][/FONT]
################################################## ##
Congratulations on your promotion.
Before you go...
Would you like to take this knife out
of my back?
You'll probably need it again.
[
FONT=Times New
Roman][/FONT]
************************************************** *********
*********************[CO
LOR=black]
Happy Birthday, Uncle Dad!
(Available only in Tennessee, Kentucky & West Virginia)
[
FONT=Times New
Roman][/FONT]
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~[
/I]
<
/SPAN>
H[I]appy birthday! You look great for your age.
Almost Lifelike!
[
FONT=Times New
Roman]
[I]
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~
When we were together,
you always said you'd die for me.
Now that we've broken up,
I think it's time you kept your
promise.[/CE
NTER]
[CENTER]
/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
/////////[F
ONT=Arial]
[/FONT]
We have been friends for a very long time ..
let's say we stop?
[
FONT=Times New
Roman][/FONT]
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ +++[/
I][
B]
I'm so miserable without you
it's almost like you're here.
[
FONT=Times New
Roman]
================================================== ===[/
B] <
/I>
Congratulations on your new bundle of joy.
Did you ever find out who the father was?
[
FONT=Times New
Roman][/FONT]
%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%
Your friends and I wanted to do
something special for your birthday.
So we're having you
put to sleep.
[
FONT=Times New
Roman][/FONT]
)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) )))))))))))
)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
So your daughter's a hooker,
and it spoiled your day.
Look at the bright side,
it's
really good
pay
[/FONT][/FONT][/FONT]
[/FONT][/COLOR]
Hallmark writers are having a bad
day........
[/C
OLOR][/FON
T]
/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
My tire was thumping.
I thought it was flat
When I looked at the tire...
I noticed
your cat.
Sorry!
[
FONT=Times New
Roman]
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~
Heard your wife left you,
How upset you must be .
But don't fret about it...
She
moved in with me.
[
FONT=Times New
Roman]
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~
Looking back over the years
that we've been together,
I can't help but wonder...
"What the hell was I thinking?"
[
FONT=Times New
Roman][/FONT]
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~
[CE
NTER]Congratulations on your wedding day!
Too bad no one likes your husband.
[/CENTER]
[
FONT=Times New
Roman][/FONT]
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~
How could two people as beautiful as you
Have such an ugly baby?
[
FONT=Times New
Roman][/FONT]
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~
I've always wanted to have
someone to hold,
someone to love.
After having met you ..
I've changed my mind.
[
FONT=Times New
Roman]
[F
ONT=Arial]--------------------------------------
-----------------------
-----------------------------------[/FONT][C
OLOR=black]
I must admit, you brought Religion into my life.
I never believed in Hell until I met you.
[
FONT=Times New
Roman][/FONT]
/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
/////////[F
ONT=Arial]
[/FONT]
As the days go by, I think of how lucky I am...
That you're not here to ruin it for me.
[
FONT=Times New
Roman][/FONT]
################################################## ##
Congratulations on your promotion.
Before you go...
Would you like to take this knife out
of my back?
You'll probably need it again.
[
FONT=Times New
Roman][/FONT]
************************************************** *********
*********************[CO
LOR=black]
Happy Birthday, Uncle Dad!
(Available only in Tennessee, Kentucky & West Virginia)
[
FONT=Times New
Roman][/FONT]
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~[
/I]
<
/SPAN>
H[I]appy birthday! You look great for your age.
Almost Lifelike!
[
FONT=Times New
Roman]
[I]
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~
When we were together,
you always said you'd die for me.
Now that we've broken up,
I think it's time you kept your
promise.[/CE
NTER]
[CENTER]
/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
/////////[F
ONT=Arial]
[/FONT]
We have been friends for a very long time ..
let's say we stop?
[
FONT=Times New
Roman][/FONT]
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ +++[/
I][
B]
I'm so miserable without you
it's almost like you're here.
[
FONT=Times New
Roman]
================================================== ===[/
B] <
/I>
Congratulations on your new bundle of joy.
Did you ever find out who the father was?
[
FONT=Times New
Roman][/FONT]
%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%
Your friends and I wanted to do
something special for your birthday.
So we're having you
put to sleep.
[
FONT=Times New
Roman][/FONT]
)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) )))))))))))
)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
So your daughter's a hooker,
and it spoiled your day.
Look at the bright side,
it's
really good
pay
[/FONT][/FONT][/FONT]
[/FONT][/COLOR]