b737pilot88
01-24-2006, 11:24 PM
Give men a "body fragrance" and they'll surely stink up a room
By
Jim Shea
The Hartford Courant
Men do not do subtle.
Ask a man to keep a secret, and he'll announce to
everyone he meets that there is something he can't talk about.
Tell a man that the suggested dress attire is
laid back and casual, and he'll show up in flip-flops and a Speedo.
Give a guy a couple of beers and a dance
floor, and what comes to mind is electrocution.
So when marketers began hyping various men's body sprays, washes
and lotions as being irresistible to women, well, the male response has been predictable: They've been buying the
stuff by the vat, rationalizing that if a little bit of these fragrances will help you get a girl, then crop-dusting
yourself with a lot of the stuff will help you get a lot of girls.
This is why more and more men are walking
around these days smelling like they have been dragged through wild flowers, dipped in the ocean and then
water-boarded in rain-forest fruit pulp.
Men just do not do well with fragrances, which is why they should
probably not be allowed to purchase anything scented without a prescription.
Nor should they be permitted to
apply anything from the scent family to their bodies — with the possible exception of foot powder — without proper
supervision.
No, men are much better off teetering along the edge of funky. Give them a shower and Speed Stick,
and they should be good to go in most circumstances.
The only time men should resort to outside aromatic agents
is in situations where they have not had a chance to shower and their natural state might violate human-rights or
chemical-weapons treaties.
What is ironic about the current male obsession with fragrance is that it might mask
the natural scents that actually can attract women.
From what I have been reading, our bodies produce these odors
called pheromones. And pheromones — which are kind of complicated but seem to work like airborne Spanish Fly — can
make us appear appealing to the opposite sex.
A couple of key things to keep in mind about pheromones are: Unless
one has undergone bloodhound-tracking training, a human can't consciously smell them. And, in terms of appealing,
we're talking about initially appealing.
All the pheromones in the world aren't going to help if you're
middle-aged and still living with mom.
Another interesting thing about the attraction power of pheromones is that
we usually smell best to a person whose genetically based immunity to disease differs most from our own. Which, call
me sentimental, does kind of take the romance out of it.
By
Jim Shea
The Hartford Courant
Men do not do subtle.
Ask a man to keep a secret, and he'll announce to
everyone he meets that there is something he can't talk about.
Tell a man that the suggested dress attire is
laid back and casual, and he'll show up in flip-flops and a Speedo.
Give a guy a couple of beers and a dance
floor, and what comes to mind is electrocution.
So when marketers began hyping various men's body sprays, washes
and lotions as being irresistible to women, well, the male response has been predictable: They've been buying the
stuff by the vat, rationalizing that if a little bit of these fragrances will help you get a girl, then crop-dusting
yourself with a lot of the stuff will help you get a lot of girls.
This is why more and more men are walking
around these days smelling like they have been dragged through wild flowers, dipped in the ocean and then
water-boarded in rain-forest fruit pulp.
Men just do not do well with fragrances, which is why they should
probably not be allowed to purchase anything scented without a prescription.
Nor should they be permitted to
apply anything from the scent family to their bodies — with the possible exception of foot powder — without proper
supervision.
No, men are much better off teetering along the edge of funky. Give them a shower and Speed Stick,
and they should be good to go in most circumstances.
The only time men should resort to outside aromatic agents
is in situations where they have not had a chance to shower and their natural state might violate human-rights or
chemical-weapons treaties.
What is ironic about the current male obsession with fragrance is that it might mask
the natural scents that actually can attract women.
From what I have been reading, our bodies produce these odors
called pheromones. And pheromones — which are kind of complicated but seem to work like airborne Spanish Fly — can
make us appear appealing to the opposite sex.
A couple of key things to keep in mind about pheromones are: Unless
one has undergone bloodhound-tracking training, a human can't consciously smell them. And, in terms of appealing,
we're talking about initially appealing.
All the pheromones in the world aren't going to help if you're
middle-aged and still living with mom.
Another interesting thing about the attraction power of pheromones is that
we usually smell best to a person whose genetically based immunity to disease differs most from our own. Which, call
me sentimental, does kind of take the romance out of it.