View Full Version : If possible, I'm seeking a woman's point of view regarding this situation.
Johnny Mnemonic
01-03-2006, 09:13 AM
This past summer I began seeing this lady coach for
proper time
management and organizational skills as I began
a new computer program and I want to make sure I stay on top of
things.
From the first time I met her, she flirted with me quite a bit (without pheromones mind you). And she'd
always find some sort of way to touch me whether it was my hands, my shoulder or giving me a big hug and pressing
herself into me. During conversations, she'd always leave her wrists facing upwards which I know is a sign.
She'd also make it a point to let me know she was single.
But here's the strange thing, over the past few
months, she still flirts with me like playing footsies under her table, still giving me big hugs and complimenting
me. But lately she literally goes from one week to being single, the next week she has a boyfriend, the next week
she's dating people, and the next week she's yet single again.
I've even referred to a "made up woman" that I
know who does this same thing just to get a reaction out of her. And she says that the woman is probably confused
and doesn't know what she wants and I should ask her.
I've attempted a couple of times to ask her out without
success, yet it's the same game, she's not single, she's single, she flirts with me and so on.
I have a
feeling I know the answer already (forget about it and move on) but I'm seeking a woman's perspective as I'm
wondering, could she really be into me, but b/c it's a professional situation for the time being, she doensn't
want to make a move?
I have actually been in this situation before with a professional. For months one of my
old bosses when I was younger pulled this same game until she could no longer control herself and one night when she
kept me late so the 2 of us were alone, she made her move and jumped me.
I also have this sense where I can
usually feel people I'm close with thinking about me even friends and they will usually call. My point to this is
that I feel my coach very strongly much of the time and I'm not thinking about her but I still feel her
prescence.
Is it possible that when we stop working together she will make a move? Or should I just forget about
her entirely (as I do have 2 very good female friends of mine in my life at the moment).
I very much appreciate
your time ladies. Happy New Year
NaughtieGirl
01-03-2006, 09:54 AM
I think you'll find out
one way or another when your professional relationship with her ends.
If she is employed by you, she might be
flirting to stay on your good side?
I suggest waiting until you stop working together, and then ask her one
more time on a date. If she still refuses then, you'll know for sure to put her in the LBJF category.
Johnny Mnemonic
01-03-2006, 09:58 AM
Thanks for your opinions
NaughtieGirl
That's what I'm thinking. Do you possibly think that she is lying about having a "boyfriend"?.
I've never met anyone who went from week to week being single, then having a boyfriend before.
She is very
attractive and I was thinking that she's using
her looks and "personality" to gain male clients.
I think this
is a pretty crappy way to get male clients. If I'm seeking
this type of aid, I want to obtain her services by her
credentials, not
her looks.
I still have at least another few months with her. So I'll just have to
wait
until then. If anything is going to happen with her, I think it will be her that makes the first
move.
Thanks again
Kardz
01-03-2006, 10:58 AM
She's playing games man.
Ask
her out again when she's being flirtacious. If she says no, stay persistant until you get something going or she
says no a second time in that encounter.
And then the next time she's being a flirt or a tease, pull back away
from her. Ignore her some or tease her in some cocky/funny way. Say something like "You totally want me" with a sly
grin on your face. Then go do something else and ignore her until she starts persuing YOU. Then you've got the
power, and leverage it to get her to go out with you.
It's all a game and all about power. If she really likes
you, you've got power. Take control.
If you can't manage a date with her, some women are just big teases
although it sounds like she has genuine interest, then just ignore her in that sense and look elsewhere for
romance.
Johnny Mnemonic
01-03-2006, 02:34 PM
She's
playing games man.
Ask her out again when she's being flirtacious. If she says no, stay persistant until you
get something going or she says no a second time in that encounter.
And then the next time she's being a flirt
or a tease, pull back away from her. Ignore her some or tease her in some cocky/funny way. Say something like "You
totally want me" with a sly grin on your face. Then go do something else and ignore her until she starts persuing
YOU. Then you've got the power, and leverage it to get her to go out with you.
It's all a game and all about
power. If she really likes you, you've got power. Take control.
If you can't manage a date with her, some
women are just big teases although it sounds like she has genuine interest, then just ignore her in that sense and
look elsewhere for romance.
It's funny you mention ignoring her or teasing her when she flirts with me
as that's exactly what I do. She seems to be secretly PO'd (trying to hide it) but I can still pick up on the fact
that she's PO'd.
When I tease she seems to feed on that. She might say something like that wasn't nice, but
I noctice that when I tease her, I get even more positive attention from her. Sometimes she also throws the fact
that she's mostly into older men (she's 28) in my face LOL.
I won't let her bring me down as that's
something I would've done when I was 18 or 20 but at 28 I'm much more experienced in this type of situation. I
will keep my ground and not give her much to feed on. I'll make sure that I'm feeding off of what she gives me.
But you are true, some women are just the biggest teases that when it actually comes down to closing the deal,
they just don't go along with it.
You might ask why I focus on this woman while I already have two other close
"female friends". I could actually see myself in a relationship with this woman.
Johnny Mnemonic
01-04-2006, 11:56 AM
Well I think I have my
answer despite her continuous body
language.
She has informed me today that she is not attracted to me, yet
she
continues to play "footsie" with me under the table. Very often she'll leave
her foot on top of mine for
almost a minute or more before moving it and
"acts" as though she's not even doing it.
And she still gives me
long and very close hugs. She says she's only attracted to men in their mid-late 30's mind you.
At this point
I'm just going to forget her and if anything does happen, she'll
have to be the one to make it happen as I'm not
going to fall into a trap.
I personally think that she's using her looks to acquire male clients which I think
is highly unethical.
If any other females would like to give their professional opinion, that would be great.
itwow
01-04-2006, 12:47 PM
Do you have any pheromone product
which contains copulins (EoW, PCC, SoE/w etc)? Wear it with a high -none combo when she's around. This will surely
tease her (invoke jealousy), try to observe her reactions as it won't be faked as before. Expect negative reactions
as the cops will snub her despite her best efforts at seducing you.
Pay no attention to what she tells you,
observe her behaviour instead. She'll be back :thumbsup:
Kardz
01-04-2006, 01:30 PM
Well I
think I have my answer despite her continuous body
language.
She has informed me today that she is not
attracted to me, yet she
continues to play "footsie" with me under the table. Very often she'll leave
her foot on
top of mine for almost a minute or more before moving it and
"acts" as though she's not even doing it.
And
she still gives me long and very close hugs. She says she's only attracted to men in their mid-late 30's mind
you.
At this point I'm just going to forget her and if anything does happen, she'll
have to be the one to
make it happen as I'm not going to fall into a trap.
I personally think that she's using her looks to acquire
male clients which I think is highly unethical.
If any other females would like to give their professional
opinion, that would be great.
She's testing you man.
Attraction isn't a choice, and i'm sure that
quote is rather cliche on these boards since alot of the user base here has read the books.
But that's not to
say she's TYPICALLY attracted to older guys.
Her telling you that she's not attracted to you reminds me of all
the women that have told me on the first, second, third date, that they aren't easy, or they aren't going to sleep
with me...and a few hours later or a few days later their panties are on top of my head.
I've read the same
things that have happened to other guys, and personal friends. It's common.
Actions really do speak louder than
words. And if she's *showing* interest and flirting with you, i'm pretty sure she is interested in you.
You
just have to crank up the game and take the power.
And if you don't plan on messing with her anymore, if she
does say "i'm only attracted to older guys" I would have a comeback line ready that says something along the lines
of "yea right" or "but your attracted to me" in some funny way.
Everything she says is telling me that she's
trying to throw you off your game or test and is bs. She's basically SHOWING you one thing, and TELLING you
something else. Wich do you think weighs more, showing you, or telling you?
And next time she's flirting with
you, make it hard on her. Like if she's playing footsie with you, move your feet back so if she wants to do it she
has to try harder. Or if she touches your hand, lean back in your chair.
She's either going to get pissy or
she's going to try harder. Both are good signs that she IS interested, and is therefor showing it.
Only thing
that would communicate that she isn't would be her being completely indifferent to you brushing her flirtaciousness
off.
Reguardless, just have fun with it. I know you like her but don't let yourself get frusterated or bothered
no matter what she does. People make stupid decisions when they feel that way. They feel powerless and act powerless
when infact they aren't necessarily.
surfs_up
01-04-2006, 01:57 PM
does come off like what you read about Borderline Personality Disorder, like a mild case of it... face it though,
this is not the behavior of fully grounded mind... sounds like she's manifesting a lot of confusions about where
she's coming from, what she wants, all the basic groundwork... You'd be wise to disconnect from her, crazy women
are never worth the hassle...
Johnny Mnemonic
01-04-2006, 02:03 PM
Do you have
any pheromone product which contains copulins (EoW, PCC, SoE/w etc)? Wear it with a high -none combo when she's
around. This will surely tease her (invoke jealousy), try to observe her reactions as it won't be faked as before.
Expect negative reactions as the cops will snub her despite her best efforts at seducing you.
Pay no attention
to what she tells you, observe her behaviour instead. She'll be back :thumbsup:
Right now I use 1 large
spray of Chikara and 2-3 full dabs of NPA around her. Could she simply be hiding her true feelings?
Forgive me
being a newbie and all, but what do some of those short names stand for such as SOE, EOW, PCC? I'm not familiar
with these abbreviations yet.
Thanks again
Johnny Mnemonic
01-04-2006, 02:08 PM
does
come off like what you read about Borderline Personality Disorder, like a mild case of it... face it though, this is
not the behavior of fully grounded mind... sounds like she's manifesting a lot of confusions about where she's
coming from, what she wants, all the basic groundwork... You'd be wise to disconnect from her, crazy women are
never worth the hassle...
LOL, you're not the first one who has said this.
I have been told this
by my two "very close female friends" as I've asked their opinions on this woman.
In simple terms (I apologize
if I offend anyone here but this was their words), my 2 female friends called her a whack job and this comes from
the opinions of two women.
I seriously think you could be right about being confused. She's also one who's
very conceited and is very cocky at times which is a turn off.
Johnny Mnemonic
01-04-2006, 02:15 PM
She's
testing you man.
Attraction isn't a choice, and i'm sure that quote is rather cliche on these boards since
alot of the user base here has read the books.
But that's not to say she's TYPICALLY attracted to older
guys.
Her telling you that she's not attracted to you reminds me of all the women that have told me on the
first, second, third date, that they aren't easy, or they aren't going to sleep with me...and a few hours later or
a few days later their panties are on top of my head.
I've read the same things that have happened to other
guys, and personal friends. It's common.
Actions really do speak louder than words. And if she's *showing*
interest and flirting with you, i'm pretty sure she is interested in you.
You just have to crank up the game
and take the power.
And if you don't plan on messing with her anymore, if she does say "i'm only attracted to
older guys" I would have a comeback line ready that says something along the lines of "yea right" or "but your
attracted to me" in some funny way.
Everything she says is telling me that she's trying to throw you off your
game or test and is bs. She's basically SHOWING you one thing, and TELLING you something else. Wich do you think
weighs more, showing you, or telling you?
And next time she's flirting with you, make it hard on her. Like if
she's playing footsie with you, move your feet back so if she wants to do it she has to try harder. Or if she
touches your hand, lean back in your chair.
She's either going to get pissy or she's going to try harder. Both
are good signs that she IS interested, and is therefor showing it.
Only thing that would communicate that she
isn't would be her being completely indifferent to you brushing her flirtaciousness off.
Reguardless, just have
fun with it. I know you like her but don't let yourself get frusterated or bothered no matter what she does. People
make stupid decisions when they feel that way. They feel powerless and act powerless when infact they aren't
necessarily.
Well Kardz, the only two possibilities are yours and Surfs_UP.
But I do agree that
actions &/or "footsie" most certainly 100% speak louder than her "I'm only interested in older men or I have a
boyfriend" or "I'm not attracted to you" LOL.
Here's one thing which makes my self confidence shine and I even
told this to her. Nothing phases me anymore, if my friends cancel out on me last minute, no bother I'll find
something to do on my own and even accidently run into people I know, or if I've faced rejection by a woman, no
bother I move to the next one without feeling sh!tty at all.
So whatever her game is, it doesn't phase me at
all. I don't let anything get me blue anymore at this point in my life as I know who I am, what I'm capable of, my
looks, and what great qualities I have to offer to both females and new male friends/buddies.
I have a
question for all of you, do you think Primal Instinct would benefit me in this case? I'm thinking of purchasing it
but I'm not sure yet??
Thanks again all, it's greatly appreciated.
Kardz
01-04-2006, 03:27 PM
That's good, most people,
including myself have a hard time detaching like that.
I've learned to some extent, and the rest I don't show,
but I always try to be objective.
I personally haven't had much luck with PI. But then again the only non-none
things i've had to mix it with until yesterday were AA314 and Chikara (both have tiny amounts?)
But right off
the bat I had results from NPA and SoE after I got it with b-nol and A1 yesterday.
Funny part was, I put both
SoE and NPA on for the first time and then went to get a haircut. The lady cutting my hair was about 6.5 but she was
like 50, i'm 22.
The whole time I was there, she would not shutup. She'd glance at me in some wierd manner
every now and then in the mirror, wich i'd assume would be the NPA. Never quite had glances like that before every
few mins.
After she was done as she was ringing me up she wrote down her entire weekly schedule on a card and
said this is when she'd be working next time I was getting a haircut (even though it was obvious it'd be 1-1.5mo.)
and I got in my car and tossed it on my seat. It landed upside down and noticed there was a homephone # there.
Instantly I was like HOLY !@#!$%!$, gogo mones!
Biggest mone hit i've ever personally had. With my old mones I
had alot of none heavy stuff and not much else. So i'd get NPA and SoE atleast. I also like AA314.
Biggest
thing that surprised me was she was like 55. Good looking for her age. And I JUST turned 22, with a young boyish
look.I'm 5'8", 155ish lbs, and white too. So that was wierd, scary, and funny all at the same time having some
woman do that to someone a fraction her age.
My hits are usually ALOT more subtle.
I used 3 dabs NPA, 2 on
my neck, 1 between wrists. Then 3 streaks of SOE. 3 inches each wrist and a small one up top on my neck.
Mtnjim
01-04-2006, 03:44 PM
She's testing you
man.
Actions really do speak louder than words. And if she's *showing* interest and flirting with you, i'm
pretty sure she is interested in you.
Ummmm! Could be true, but are you familiar with the term "Attention
*hore"??
CptKipling
01-04-2006, 05:10 PM
She sounds like a lot of
work...
I can see 3 possibilities:
1) She is just strange
2) She likes you but is testing you and playing
hard to get
3) She is playing you for the attention
...but is she worth the work?
Johnny Mnemonic
01-04-2006, 08:41 PM
That's
good, most people, including myself have a hard time detaching like that.
I've learned to some extent, and the
rest I don't show, but I always try to be objective.
I personally haven't had much luck with PI. But then
again the only non-none things i've had to mix it with until yesterday were AA314 and Chikara (both have tiny
amounts?)
But right off the bat I had results from NPA and SoE after I got it with b-nol and A1 yesterday.
Funny part was, I put both SoE and NPA on for the first time and then went to get a haircut. The lady cutting my
hair was about 6.5 but she was like 50, i'm 22.
The whole time I was there, she would not shutup. She'd glance
at me in some wierd manner every now and then in the mirror, wich i'd assume would be the NPA. Never quite had
glances like that before every few mins.
After she was done as she was ringing me up she wrote down her entire
weekly schedule on a card and said this is when she'd be working next time I was getting a haircut (even though it
was obvious it'd be 1-1.5mo.) and I got in my car and tossed it on my seat. It landed upside down and noticed there
was a homephone # there. Instantly I was like HOLY !@#!$%!$, gogo mones!
Biggest mone hit i've ever personally
had. With my old mones I had alot of none heavy stuff and not much else. So i'd get NPA and SoE atleast. I also
like AA314.
Biggest thing that surprised me was she was like 55. Good looking for her age. And I JUST turned 22,
with a young boyish look.I'm 5'8", 155ish lbs, and white too. So that was wierd, scary, and funny all at the same
time having some woman do that to someone a fraction her age.
My hits are usually ALOT more subtle.
I used 3
dabs NPA, 2 on my neck, 1 between wrists. Then 3 streaks of SOE. 3 inches each wrist and a small one up top on my
neck.
I'm new to the whole terminology LOL so plz forgive me if I ask what does SOE stand for, which
product is that? I still have some NPA left which I like. I seem to see a lot of positive posts and comments on SOE
mixed with NPA so maybe that's what I will go with.
I would definitely give this older lady a call. You want to
have experiences to look back on when you're older. You will start seeing that as you start reaching your late
20's trust me. Thanks for the info and story.
Johnny Mnemonic
01-04-2006, 08:42 PM
Ummmm!
Could be true, but are you familiar with the term "Attention *hore"??
LOL hell yeah I'm very much
familiar with the term "Attention hore". My gym is full of them (plz no offense to any members of the opposite
sex)
Johnny Mnemonic
01-04-2006, 08:44 PM
She
sounds like a lot of work...
I can see 3 possibilities:
1) She is just strange
2) She likes you but is
testing you and playing hard to get
3) She is playing you for the attention
...but is she worth the
work?
That's exactly what my two female friends think and they along with
I believe that it's
probably a mix of #1 and #3. #2 is most likely a long shot. If anything does happen with her, I won't make a move
as I've already tried once or twice discreetly.
platinumfox
01-05-2006, 04:37 PM
Shes playing with you bro and
your in her web whether you know it or not.Shes using her "feminine charms" for an ulterior motive probably for male
clients like you said.
The next time she plays footsies with you just tell her you have a girlfriend and tell
her you will "tell your made up girlfriend"If she continues that means she wants you so bad that shes not just
"playing with your head".If she stops that means she has respect for your "made up lady" and was teasing.
The
next option is ask about her "boyfriend or friends" to the point where you will catch her in a lie which she is
already doing.
Are you two alone when she "flirts" or are there others around?
Johnny Mnemonic
01-07-2006, 08:15 AM
Shes
playing with you bro and your in her web whether you know it or not.Shes using her "feminine charms" for an ulterior
motive probably for male clients like you said.
The next time she plays footsies with you just tell her you have
a girlfriend and tell her you will "tell your made up girlfriend"If she continues that means she wants you so bad
that shes not just "playing with your head".If she stops that means she has respect for your "made up lady" and was
teasing.
The next option is ask about her "boyfriend or friends" to the point where you will catch her in a lie
which she is already doing.
Are you two alone when she "flirts" or are there others around?
A couple
of people who've replied recently after my last couple of posts
stating that she actually told me she's not
attracted to me yet continues to flirt, touch, hug, compliment my hair or clothing, and play footsie with me tells
them that she actually is attracted to me.
As for telling her that I have a female friend, I've already told
her about 2 female friends that I have and see occasionally yet she continues with her ways.
I'm an open minded
person and I'm at the point in my life where I can have "casual friendships", but if the ideal person for a
relationship came into my life, I'd go for the relationship (so far that hasn't happened since I broke up with my
ex of 3yrs last February) so I guess you could say I'm just having fun until this happens.
Point being I could
see myself with this woman in a relationship, her looks and personality (for the most part despite her games) would
match mine ideally IMO.
In regards to Kardz I just think it's weird that when a woman sets out to tell you
she's not attractecd to you, most of the time that actually means that she is.
I've had a few experiences as he
has with women who've set out to tell me their not attracted to me, and they wind up in my bed and some I've even
dated for extended periods of time.
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