Relationships vs. Dating vs. Hookups

[valentines_garden]

I wonder how many of you are looking for/interested in/prefer long-lasting relationships as opposed to

casual dating or even one-night stands? Also, once you've found that perfect girlfriend or wife, do you continue

using 'mones to make yourself attractive to her and other women, and why? Do you ever have fears that she may be

attracted to you primarily because of the 'mones than for who you are, and do you have a problem with that?

As

someone remarked in my college newspaper once, there seem to be a lot of random hookups (especially by drunk people

after parties) and a few long-term relationships here but almost no middle ground (dating). I'm just curious to

know everyone's take on it.

[belgareth]

In my own case, I'va always

preferrred long term relationships and have only engaged in one-nighters on rare occaision. Any more, the risks

associated with one nighters, STDs that will kill you are one good example, make it too risky for my taste. I also

find that once you get to know your partner well sex gets better. It does require you to work at it but is well

worth the effort.

I didn't get involved with mones for sex in the first place so I may be a bit different than

most here. Mones for me are mostly for the extra edge they give me in business. After getting involved in mones I

met my girlfriend but we are both sure it was other things that she liked about me before she ever got close enough

for the mones to have an effect on her. Certainly, the mones helped later. Since we live together she knows me

without mones as well as with them. There's a lot more to our relationship than that.

No, I'm not the least

bit concerned that she is mostly attracted because of the mones. She knows me and likes who I am and how I act. You

need to keep in mind that pheromones are only a small part of the picture in a relationship. If you rely on them for

everything and don't pay attention to your personality and the way you treat a woman, it isn't going to last.

[tim929]

As a general rule,men prefer the

idea of being in a long term relationship.In the absence of one they will settle for casual dating.In the absence of

that then a good one night stand beats sitting on the couch with a jar of crunchy peanut butter and the TV remote

looking for soft core porn on the Playboy chanel.(I will spare you the details on what the peanut butter is for.)

Men,unfortunatly have a tendancy,just like women to become very jaded as a result of a history of failed

relationships.That jaded attitude effects thier willingness to engage in anything like a "meaningful

relationship."

Having been burned to the ground on a number of occasions,and having seen amny friends (male and

female)get burned to the ground on many occasions,I can understand why people become reluctant to get too

involved.But in our heart of hearts,we all still have the same ultimate desire for love,stability and companionship

that undamaged people have.

As for the college scene,when you throw hormones and alcohol into the same

room,there are bound to be a fair number of people doing things that they will eventualy deny ever having done.One

need only watch a couple instalments of "Girls Gone Wild" to see that these young women will someday soon look at

themselves in the mirror and gasp "oh my god,what have I done?!" I watch Girls Gone Wild purely for research and

educational purposes.Imaging going to the video store while your wife is out of town and renting "Girls Gone Wild"

and scanning thru it only to see your daughter getting it on with her roommate.(Wont happen to me but Im sure it has

happened somewhere.)

One of the factors that we also run up against in our western scociety is an ever declining

sense of moral and ethical boundaries.In my life time alone,television has gone from not allowing the word "damn" to

be used to displaying near nudity and verbal descriptions of oral and anal sex as well as references to things like

rimming and threesomes.Vivid descriptions too...not just vague illusions to these practices.The sex scenes on TV are

better than most of the porn I saw in Highschool.The moral "property line" has faded over time and with the advent

of the internet,cable television,rap music,crunchy peanut butter and an ever retreating parental influence,our

youngest children know about things that many people didnt learn in the sixties until after they graduated

college.

It's interesting to note that in the television program "I love Lucy," the stars of the show Lucy and

Ricky were real life husband and wife.They also played husband and wife in the series and initialy,they were not

allowed to be displayed in the bedroom...at all...even standing up and fully clothed.After alittle negotiating with

the sensors,the network eventualy caved and allowed them to be seen in the bedroom,even in thier pajamas...but they

were required to sleep in seperate beds spaced at least three feet appart.Network sensors of the day also had major

issues with on screen kissing.Open mouth kissing was a big no-no.Kisses were not allowed to last more than a couple

seconds.Failure to adhere to these rules would result in charges of obscenety and could get people throw in

jail.Open mouth kissing in a movie was enough to get an R rating and profanity was not allowed.Recently I watched

Shrek and noticed more profanity that most adult movies would have allowed in the 50's and 60's.

Any more,soft

core porn pales in comparison to a good hollywood sex scene.I have seen better performances from actresses who DONT

do porn that women who do.And lets not forget the freak shows that are constantly being paraded out like Paris

Hilton.Kids see that stuff.Kids respond at a very primitive level to that stuff.And they make bad decisions based

uppon what they have been conditioned to.Curiosity gets the better of them and they start looking to the internet

for more.I learned about a wonderful little web site that displays simply the most graphic and obscene materiaI have

ever seen in my life.This website displays not only the very hardest core porn,but videos of executions in Iraq,the

results of car accidents...you name it,if its porny or bloody its there.Some of it would make a maggot puke.I

learned about this web site from a middle class thirteen year old kid and his friends.These are kids who are in the

band and soccer.They have good homes,involved parents,good grades...normal all american kids.And they eat this stuff

up like it was the greatest thing on earth.

This is the state of affairs in our scociety today.And these

declining standards have had a huge impact on what people regard as "acceptable behavior."