Standard steps to dating

[CollegeStudent]

Did a

search on here and google and couldnt find anything like this. Im trying to find a guide of standards for typical

dating. What I mean is, what is expected on first dates? Dinner dates? Second dates? When to continue?

I

understand that someone has to look for "roadsigns" to figure out when they should move forward, but Im just curious

if there is a regular guide to the rate that this goes?

Like for instance: First date, expected to hold her

hand while walking, open doors, pull out her chair, etc. Second date: in addition to first date stuff... so and

so

I know that this differs from person to person but there has got to be a norm somewhere that alot of

people fall into. Anyone seen anything like this? Or maybe can post one?

[Yoel]

There's a booklet called "Critical

Moments & Bridges" that comes with DeAngelo's DYD, which is all about that topic. I obviously can't post it here

but, hey, I gave you directions ;)

Yoel

[Gegogi]

Sheesh, go with the flow and

improvise as the moment unfolds. That doesn't mean you can't have a plan for the date but basic manners (opening

doors, being on time, etc.) should be a given (except for true feminists, let them open the door). If you get all

stiff and formulaic it can be a big turnoff for the woman. They want you to listen to the ryhthm of their heart and

respond appropriately. Trust me, if she wants her hand held, you'll know.

[bjf]

There's a lot of stuff here.

Basically, for some people, reading signs is intuitive, others it is not. So you can read up on stuff in here,

click on dating and flirting. The link has been posted on here quite a while ago, but I'm going to put it on the

newbies click here because I couldn't dig it up when I looked for it on the forum.



http://digilander.libero.it/linguaggiodelcorpo/biblio/

[phinmone]

well there has been many threads

on this topic. about dating and handling women. but they just scratch the very surface... i would lean to yoel's

comment. yes, DYD is very helpful. just attach the whole DYD mentality to your soul and you will go far

:)



Dinner dates?
are you paying? if yes, goodbye to your money! never buy her a

dinner in the first dates, never! trust me on this, it's not good and it does not get you further. do NOT try to

impress her that you can pay the dinner.



what is expected on first dates
make her

laugh and do not be unpredictable. read her and ask her questions. do not tell so much about yourself, just ask her

questions. women LOVE to talk about themselves. echo her, make her laugh, tease a little, and END the date early =

YES. she will be missing you more after this. never be needy! do not try to hang on to her like little puppy, be the

alpha male and tell her what to do.

+ something like this.

phinmone

[TRock]

well there has

been many threads on this topic. about dating and handling women. but they just scratch the very surface... i would

lean to yoel's comment. yes, DYD is very helpful. just attach the whole DYD mentality to your soul and you will go

far :)



are you paying? if yes, goodbye to your money! never buy her a dinner in the first dates, never!

trust me on this, it's not good and it does not get you further. do NOT try to impress her that you can pay the

dinner.



make her laugh and do not be unpredictable. read her and ask her questions. do not tell so much

about yourself, just ask her questions. women LOVE to talk about themselves. echo her, make her laugh, tease a

little, and END the date early = YES. she will be missing you more after this. never be needy! do not try to hang on

to her like little puppy, be the alpha male and tell her what to do.

+ something like this.

phinmone



like phinmone said. you have to kill your old social programming and all the conditioning that society has done

to you.

never spend money on women you don't know well. if you wouldn't buy your best friend dinner would you

buy a female you don't know well dinner?

[Pancho1188]

women LOVE to

talk about themselves.
Everyone loves to talk about themselves. People have an inherent need to feel

important. If you can fulfill that need in anyone, you have just developed rapport.

[phinmone]

what i like to add

more:


First date, expected to hold her hand while walking, open doors, pull out her

chair

do not act like a wussy and think "oh, should i hold her hand". try to get the situation more

loose by for example taking her hand and say "no handsholding this early!" and let go. this makes the situation

funny and you are in a funny way accusing her for taking your hand in her hand.

learn the cocky + funny

attitute and tease her. always open doors, women really appreciate this. what i do, i open the door and say "ladies

first" with a serious face then smile.

but one of the important things on dates (usually the first ones) in

order to make her feel more attraction (but you have to know that she likes you - and these sings you can read in

the first time you meet her, easy) is to end the date by the time when you are having fun (or just short after that)

and feeling great.

yeah-.

[Pancho1188]

try to get the

situation more loose by for example taking her hand and say "no handsholding this early!" and let go. this makes the

situation funny and you are in a funny way accusing her for taking your hand in her hand.

This has been

recommended on the forum before:

http://pherolibrary.com/forum/s

howthread.php?t=11137&highlight=hand+holding+early (http://pherolibrary.com/forum/showthread.php?t=11137&highlight=hand+holding+early)

Is there something I'm missing? If I were a girl, I'd

give you the most puzzled look and think you were psychotic. I know this one person who would do the same, and I

even have the look in my mind on how she would stare at me if I did that.

I get the recommendation of joking

about the stupid 'process' of relationships (I like talking about it because it's so dumb to just be all awkward

and ignore it), but exclaiming, "No hand-holding this early!" after taking her hand makes it look like you're

schizophrenic or multiple-personality or something.

Am I wrong? :think: Somebody tell me I'm not

schizophrenic... :hammer:

[TRock]

telling her you don't want to

hold her hand turns you into the prize and brings her into the frame that she wants you.

[Gegogi]

You'll need to be convincing in

your new role to be successful, so enrolling in an acting class would be a good idea.

[Yoel]

@Pancho:
You're psycho! Psycho

I tell you! Somebody pin him down!

The thing is, it was phinmone that time too :)
I think he's coming

from a misinterpretation (exaggeration?) of one of DeAngelo's teases. It actually should go like this: you stretch

out your hand casually like you are offering it to her but looking elsewhere, then when she grabs it you act

surprised and deliver the remark, that way it's funny :)

Yoel

[bjf]

I thought it was pretty funny

myself.

[Yoel]

The grab-bitch move? Well, maybe

it's funny to see it, but outright weird. As in, you don't want to give the girl the impression that you're a

crackhead now, do you?
What you want to do instead is "telling" her she's the one making moves on you. Because as

soon as she feels being rejected (even if she isn't making any move at all!) she'll come back to win you. And

that's about the point of this, not the wackiness.

Yoel

[Mtnjim]

[QUOTE=Pancho1188Am I wrong?

:think: Somebody tell me I'm not schizophrenic... :hammer:[/QUOTE]

Panch, of course you're not

schizophrenic, so calm down and go with these nice men in the white coats! :wave:

[HK45Mark23]

[QUOTE=Pancho1188Am I wrong? :think: Somebody tell me I'm not schizophrenic... :hammer:Panch, of

course you're not schizophrenic, so calm down and go with these nice men in the white coats! :wave:


Pancho everything is ok. Come along now. We have a nice shot for you. It will make you feel relaxed

and very good. Well lookie here at this nice white jacket that ties in the back, it will keep you nice and cozy wile

you sleep in your special room we prepared just for you. Come along now. We are here to help you.:rasp:

[phinmone]

The thing is,

it was phinmone that time too :)
I think he's coming from a misinterpretation (exaggeration?) of one of

DeAngelo's teases. It actually should go like this: you stretch out your hand casually like you are offering it to

her but looking elsewhere, then when she grabs it you act surprised and deliver the remark, that way it's funny

:)

Yoel

Yes, it was me back then TOO. well it is meant as an exaggeration. and it should

be meant as a joke too and not taken so seriously (so panchos reaction of being super serious about this is wrong :)

). when i meet a girl, i joke about her tease and they do not misinterpret this action = they do not look confused,

they smile or laugh. i am convincing, have been doing some acting on stage, i know what i am doing! :)

but

yoel's interpretation could work for some persons too, but it would not be something for me.

the problem i

had before summer 2004 was that i was too serious. but after learning the right tactics and having C+F attitude in

my soul, working wonders on me!

[Yoel]

Phin,
we are talking about

different styles here I guess...
I bet you've seen the DYD dvd seminar, I sense some Mark (or whatever was the

dorky guy called). I mean, not that his approach is bad in any way (since he had amazing success and all, being the

first guest there proved it), but if you are not REALLY good at it you came off as the jester (funny but not cocky),

and as trying hard to get her attention.

Actually, maybe I'm exaggerating it too. Now that I think of it, if

you teased the girl about trying to pick you up before (and I bet you did :D) that could work as well, as a

recurring tease. My suggestion comes handy if you haven't already had the opportunity of busting her balls on her

forwardness :)

Yoel

[Pancho1188]

@Pancho:
You're

psycho! Psycho I tell you! Somebody pin him down!

The thing is, it was phinmone that time too :)
I think he's

coming from a misinterpretation (exaggeration?) of one of DeAngelo's teases. It actually should go like this: you

stretch out your hand casually like you are offering it to her but looking elsewhere, then when she grabs it you act

surprised and deliver the remark, that way it's funny :)

Yoel
Thanks, Yoel. That makes sense (to

play on my schizo joke, that way you're talking to her and it doesn't look like you're talking to yourself).



I think the misunderstanding is my interpretation of such an act as described by phinmone:

"*Reaches for hand*

No! It's too early for hand-holding!"

"Must have chocolate...*Reaches for chocolate*...No! No

chocolate for you! You're on a diet!"

I'm imagining the tone of voice like George Costanza saying, "These

pretzels...are making me thirsty!" :lol:


Since no one else thinks this is a dangerous move, I'll

assume that the girls I've gone out with are either sensitive and would be offended by such a remark or are laid

back and would question such an emotional outburst, humorous or otherwise.

[Yoel]

"*Reaches for

hand* No! It's too early for hand-holding!" Omg Pancho, I didn't even get you were thinking of

that, that's freaking hilarious!
:LOL:

Yoel

[Pancho1188]

and it should

be meant as a joke too and not taken so seriously (so panchos reaction of being super serious about this is wrong :)

).
I'm sure women love it when you tell them they're wrong.

-No, it's too early for

hand-holding!
--*Blank stare/questioning look* Uhhh...okay...
-You're supposed to laugh! It's a joke! You take

things too seriously.
--Uhhh...okay...

The above conversation is what would happened to me if I said that to

someone.

[Watcher]

90% of first dates go nowhere

thats a fact - women are specific with taking things further treat each new date as a learning experience use it for

confidence of course have some pheromones on it enhances youre presence. just go with the flow if it doesnt work

out there are of course other women out there.

If youe overweight lose the weight women want guys that have

nice looking bodies.

[Yoel]

-No, it's too

early for hand-holding!
--*Blank stare/questioning look* Uhhh...okay...
-You're supposed to laugh! It's a

joke! You take things too seriously.
--Uhhh...okay... And then you headbutt her impromptu and run

away.

Yoel

[Pancho1188]

Omg Pancho, I

didn't even get you were thinking of that, that's freaking hilarious!
:LOL:

Yoel
See? Wouldn't

that make you look like a psycho? That's why I say it's dangerous. That's also why your alternative made sense

because you were definitely talking to her instead of maybe looking like you're talking to yourself because you're

the one who reached for her hand.

Remember, it's how they take it that determines their reaction. Like I said,

maybe I've just gone out with people who would take it wrong or maybe Phinmone is just really good at it. If it

works for him, you, and everyone else, I'm happy for you. I'm just giving you my horror story of the confused

look after a joke.

I'm still scarred after this one time where I blatantly gave a sarcastic comment

about how I was my friend was going to 'get a lot of action' on the bed I was putting together (I was laughing and

gave a sarcastic smile and everything) only to get an "Uhhh..." answer that made me reply that it was a joke only to

get an "Okay..." kind of response. Speaking of which, I found it hilarious because we were screwing in her bed

(literally screwing in her bed...you know, twisting the screws in her bedframe while putting it together). Man,

those were good times. Screwing in a girl's bed...how can you not find that funny? :POKE:

*sigh* Maybe it

is just me... :frustrate

Nah... :lol:

[Watcher]

with the phreomones you gotta

remember it enhances reactions both ways - you need some anol and arone to give her the friendly chatting dependable

impression moreso and some Anone to trigger a hopefully sexual response.

But the mones are just another tool

that helps with interactions with others but it isnt the end all and be all but it does help subtely - its just

another tool in my sexual attraction arsenal

Some will see big improvements for others very minor.

[Yoel]

@Pancho:

Phin's way is an

all-night show, you can't just be plain normal and then play the hand joke out of the blue, that would make Brad

Pitt look like a freak.

Yoel

[Pancho1188]

You're talking to Jerry

Seinfeld, here... ;)


Speaking of Seinfeld and dating...

The basic problem with the beginning of the

relationship, I think, is that each person has their own sexual time-table of what should happen when, that the

other person knows nothing about. That's why I really think we need some sort of sexual rulebook, where it's

written down and agreed upon - sexual, standard, dating procedure. Know what I mean? So if there's any problems,

you can go, "Look, honey, I'm very sorry, but we've been out three times, and according to Article 7, Section 5,

there's got to be some physical contact, as you can see." "Otherwise, I will report you to the board, and they can

put out a warrant for an embrace."

[Yoel]

If you're funny, how can the girls

you go out with be dull? :think:

As experience tells impulse kicks morality in the head, so if you play your

cards well, things should go a lot smoother. (the booklet I plugged in my first post helps a lot)
Besides, a

man's sexual time-table reads more or less like this: now :D

Yoel

[phinmone]

@Pancho:



Phin's way is an all-night show, you can't just be plain normal and then play the hand joke out of the blue, that

would make Brad Pitt look like a freak.

Yoel

yes, this is soooo correct! if i had done

this hand-joke like 6 months ago, the girls would have thought "what a psycho". but you really have to have an

outgoing, relaxed, C+F attitude to do this. this works for me. and other c+f stuff. it's so funny and relaxing. but

you don't know have this style, i really do NOT recommend to do this.

to every guy: NEVER BE NORMAL +

PREDICTABLE

@pancho: if you are not familiar with DYD, get on to it!

[Yoel]

@pancho: if you are

not familiar with DYD, get on to it! I second that.

Yoel

[MOBLEYC57]

I second that.



YoelSometime back ... someone said THE SYSTEM is better than DYD. Anyone!? Anyone!? :blink:

[Yoel]

someone said THE

SYSTEM is better than DYD. Never heard of that, some directions?

Yoel

[MOBLEYC57]

Never heard of that,

some directions?



Yoelhttp://www.askmen.net/dating/the_system/inde

x.html (http://www.askmen.net/dating/the_system/index.html)

That should get your feet in the water, Yoel. Mods, if the rules are any links, I'm guilty, sorry,

or is it to other mone links? :blink:

[Yoel]

@Mobley:

Ok, even though I'd

never buy something from someone called Doc Love (it's like a red pulsing light with scam written all over it!), I

want to hear more. I need testimonials I can trust, not those phony ones on the site. So, anyone?

Yoel

[Pancho1188]

I know people won't agree

with me on this one, but DYD is just exploiting the obvious.

Be confident.
Be interesting.
Be worth sleeping

with.

DYD is what they call "fake it until you make it." I'd prefer just making it instead (in other words,

just becoming confident and letting my attitude speak for itself instead of putting on an act to sucker someone into

liking my show long enough to sleep with them).

Again, that's just me. I don't expect anyone to agree with

that, and others that are more familiar with the material may believe otherwise.

[SweetBrenda]

I used to not

kiss on the first date. Don't know whatever happend to that? :angel: I guess as long as the date goes fine and I

really enjoy the company why the hell not? I don't like to follow rules to much and to me it seems like " no

kissing, no holding hands blah blah blah" at the 1st or 2nd date are just rules someone invented just because...



Okay with this I am not saying I will go and have sex right away either

not because I don't want to but because sex is way more complicated then just a few kisses but eventually if things

keep going in the right direction then hey,,, it's all good.

I guess is

all about the Body language, if the girl/guy is digging you then just go along with the flow...:wub:

[MOBLEYC57]

I know people

won't agree with me on this one, but DYD is just exploiting the obvious.

Be confident.
Be interesting.
Be

worth sleeping with.

DYD is what they call "fake it until you make it." I'd prefer just making it instead (in

other words, just becoming confident and letting my attitude speak for itself instead of putting on an act to sucker

someone into liking my show long enough to sleep with them).

Again, that's just me. I don't expect anyone to

agree with that, and others that are more familiar with the material may believe otherwise.Pretty much, but!

... there are those that need help in the sense of humor area, and summada stuff gives good ideas in that area.

There are women that need help in that area too! I love it when a woman makes me laff!:rofl:

[Pancho1188]

Pretty much,

but! ... there are those that need help in the sense of humor area, and summada stuff gives good ideas in that area.

There are women that need help in that area too! I love it when a woman makes me laff!:rofl:
Good point,

Mobley. :goodpost:

[Yoel]

I know people

won't agree with me on this one, but DYD is just exploiting the obvious.

Be confident.
Be interesting.
Be

worth sleeping with. That's just the backbone, I don't think there's ANY system out there that doesn't

suggest those things. The innovation (if you would) of DYD is the "cocky/funny" equation, which isn't something

that common sense (or more likely common programming) would suggest you.


DYD is what they

call "fake it until you make it." I'd prefer just making it instead (in other words, just becoming confident and

letting my attitude speak for itself instead of putting on an act to sucker someone into liking my show long enough

to sleep with them). It is not a show as I already stated somewhere, but the opposite. You're supposed to

free yourself from all those restraints society tells you must have and go from there.

Yoel

[MOBLEYC57]

Good point,

Mobley. :goodpost:Why, thank you, Pancho! Midnight, the docks!:whip:

[SweetBrenda]

Why, thank

you, Pancho! Midnight, the docks!:whip:Oohh Gawddddd! Pancho and Mobley get

a room you too or take it to PM...
I think you guys just had your first

date alright!! :POKE:
Ha!
:run:

[MOBLEYC57]

Oohh Gawddddd! Pancho and Mobley get a room you too or

take it to PM...
I think you guys just had your first date alright!!

:POKE:
Ha!
:run:All up in other peoples business! Chill out Sweety B:whip:

, I'm not after yer man! :trout:

Anywho, we were talking about the System ......

[TRock]

Sometime back ...

someone said THE SYSTEM is better than DYD. Anyone!? Anyone!? :blink:
from what i've read on other

forums, the system is better if you're in a relationship. it's not used to pick up woman.

[SweetBrenda]

All up in

other peoples business! Chill out Sweety B:whip: , I'm not after yer man! :trout:

Anywho, we were talking

about the System ...... But this is my business tooooo I

thought?...LOL ! having a sense of humor is one of the best qualities in a

man...:wub:
I'm chillin' I'm just having fun with you that is all darling...


Pancho knows I luv him and he wouldn't trade me for you. Right Pancho??


Panchoooooooooo where are you?:wub:
Mobley:POKE:


Smile, please!

[Pancho1188]

That's just the

backbone, I don't think there's ANY system out there that doesn't suggest those things. The innovation (if you

would) of DYD is the "cocky/funny" equation, which isn't something that common sense (or more likely common

programming) would suggest you.

It is not a show as I already stated somewhere, but the opposite. You're

supposed to free yourself from all those restraints society tells you must have and go from there.

Yoel


Fight Club. "Society of men raised by women." I will agree with you on that one. Women will turn you into a

'nice guy' but long for the 'real man'.

The cocky/funny equation is why I use the word "exploit" in my

description. There are other ways of attracting women, but you can exploit a woman's own insecurities and need to

feel important by putting her down jokingly and making yourself look like you'll raise her status by association or

through interaction or whatever. I only use the word exploit because I feel that that's a 'sneaky' way to do it.

That doesn't mean it's wrong...it's just my own personal opinion. But, as you said and would probably argue,

that is part of the restraints that I limit myself to because of my upbringing.





Brenda, you're so

silly, girl! Come on over and sit on Pancho's lap...Christmas is coming, and it's not just the goose that'll be

getting fat if you tell me that you've been naughty, chica... ;)

Okay, so I guess I can do it. :rofl:

[SweetBrenda]

Brenda,

you're so silly, girl! Come on over and sit on Pancho's lap...Christmas is coming, and it's not just the goose

that'll be getting fat if you tell me that you've been naughty, chica... ;)

Okay, so I guess I can do it.

:rofl:LOL@ Panch'Claus.
For your info I'm never naughty just "nice".:angel:

The whole dating deal

sucks to tell you the truth.
The more you try not to embarrass yourself on the first dates the worse you behave by

being to careful perhaps spill a glass of water or drop the food from the fork while you're trying to take a bite

of food! things you normally woudn't do if you aren't nervous and just relaxed..
The Dating Game is that a game!

hate it!!
But eventually we all are in it.
And trying to make the best of it.. ugh

[Yoel]

The cocky/funny

equation is why I use the word "exploit" in my description. There are other ways of attracting women, but you can

exploit a woman's own insecurities and need to feel important by putting her down jokingly and making yourself look

like you'll raise her status by association or through interaction or whatever. I only use the word exploit because

I feel that that's a 'sneaky' way to do it. That doesn't mean it's wrong...it's just my own personal opinion.

But, as you said and would probably argue, that is part of the restraints that I limit myself to because of my

upbringing. I can see your point but think about this: if she was a guy, would you miss a single occasion of

mocking him? Whether we are talking about her looks or her whining, I don't think so.
Why do we do that? I'll

tell you why, because of intimidation, fear of consequences. If we were really free, we would tease each other all

day long, 'cause it's funny :)
So, I'd say you're sneaky when you try to please her (even if it backfires, you

are actually playing a part to get her), not when you are yourself. If you think you are genetically pleasing, think

again, it's programming.

Yoel

[Pancho1188]

I can see your

point but think about this: if she was a guy, would you miss a single occasion of mocking him? Whether we are

talking about her looks or her whining, I don't think so.
Why do we do that? I'll tell you why, because of

intimidation, fear of consequences. If we were really free, we would tease each other all day long, 'cause it's

funny :)
So, I'd say you're sneaky when you try to please her (even if it backfires, you are actually playing a

part to get her), not when you are yourself. If you think you are genetically pleasing, think again, it's

programming.

Yoel
You're right, as my position does not void your position (they are just

different).

The top two things that all of my gfs have liked about me is that I make them feel good about

themselves and I am sincere. I do not try to please people just to get with them...if I make a compliment, I mean

it. I usually tease the opposite way. Like I tease them about something good like it was something bad. That's

fun. Actually, now that I think about it, that's pretty much what you're saying, anyway. Ha, ha. I guess I do

all of that already and didn't even know it! :rofl:

[Yoel]

I usually tease

the opposite way. Like I tease them about something good like it was something bad. That's fun. Actually, now that

I think about it, that's pretty much what you're saying, anyway. Ha, ha. I guess I do all of that already and

didn't even know it! :rofl: Yeah, who ever said you actually had to dislike something to tease her on it? I

sure don't mind if she trips and bumps her breasts on me, but what the hell, "Hey, I didn't know you were such a

forward girl!" That's the funny part! :D

Yoel

[SweetBrenda]

The

top two things that all of my gfs have liked about me is that I make them feel good about themselves and I am

sincere. I do not try to please people just to get with them...Pancho you are going to make a woman very

lucky and happy someday...:kiss:

[phinmone]

Yeah, who ever said

you actually had to dislike something to tease her on it? I sure don't mind if she trips and bumps her breasts on

me, but what the hell, "Hey, I didn't know you were such a forward girl!" That's the funny part! :D



Yoel

better yet, when a girl is touching you with her breasts (like standin behind you really / quite

close) is to say: "hey, stop touching me or i will accuse you for sexual harrasment. i am tired girls touching me

with their boobs and handling me like a peace of meat". COCKY + FUNNY as hell! right on!

attention: not for

wussies!

[SweetBrenda]

better yet,

when a girl is touching you with her breasts (like standin behind you really / quite close) is to say: "hey, stop

touching me or i will accuse you for sexual harrasment. i am tired girls touching me with their boobs and handling

me like a peace of meat". COCKY + FUNNY as hell! right on!

attention: not for wussies!Yup that is

definitely funny...:LOL:

[Have_Courage]

##########

[Elvis]

Sheesh, go with

the flow and improvise as the moment unfolds. That doesn't mean you can't have a plan for the date but basic

manners (opening doors, being on time, etc.) should be a given (except for true feminists, let them open the door).

If you get all stiff and formulaic it can be a big turnoff for the woman. They want you to listen to the ryhthm of

their heart and respond appropriately. Trust me, if she wants her hand held, you'll know.
I have to agree

with Gegogi on this one.

[bizraterx]

Im kinda in a hurry right now

so ill try to make this brief. Normally when I would talk to girls I would be very attentive to them, for example if

they half muttered some sentence I would ask them what they had just said.

The revelation: After years of being

attentive to girls I learned that %99 of the time its better to "bust their balls" than to hang on every word they

say. The results I must say have been good and bad. My new theory is that there is a gradient on how well women

respond to you making fun of them and how well they respond to you being nice to them, the prettier the girl the

more she will like you if you mess with her, act cocky and funny, and bust her balls. But do beware! Some girls

especially if they are shy or generally keep to themselves will get mad at you if you overdo the coky funny thing. I

know this one gorgeus girl in high school I would rank her a 10 out of 10 perhaps the most sought after girl in my

high school. Most guys I noticed were way to nice to her...I did the complete opposite, I always turn around things

so that it seems like shes comming on to me. The intresting thing about this girl is that I know that I can really

bust her balls and be really cocky and funny around her and she will always laugh.

I guess my point is that Im

starting to turn my personality into a more playful funny type which has helped me have a more fun and intresting

time when I talk to girls. There are many roads to rome being coky and funny is only one way albeit one of the best

ways to get there.

[TRock]

^ it's a calibration thing. the

hotter the girl the more cocky you should be. they know they're in the top tier of women so they don't get

bothered by you being cocky because they know you're just playing.

[CollegeStudent]

Thx for the tips guys.

Ill have to check out that ebook.

Heres a simple question that maybe yall can answer right now. So far Ive

seen this girl three times, tho never tried to hold her hand or get close. The closest we've been is sitting

pretty close watching a movie. I have a thing where I wont try anything unless she basically comes out and invites

me, and so far the only times Ive been able to see her is with her friends (both male and female). This isnt

because of timing, she always invites friends over when I come by. I assume this is because she is still in the

"dont trust you yet" phase (I dont blame her, cant be too careful these days).

She works alot, up till 10pm

on rougly 5 days a week. I dont think I can actually say that Ive been on a "date" with her yet, just been by her

apartment a few times. What do you guys think would be appropriate next? Perhaps actually taking her out on a

date? A movie? (talk about typical usual date :) )

[Have_Courage]

##########

[Have_Courage]

##########

[Yoel]

What's with you not trying

anything unless she goes for it? Grow some balls already, wussyboy ;)


1. the physical

manifestations displayed when speaking (facial expressions, eye contact, hand gestures, posture etc). Don't

stare/look at the chest, gaze at her eyes 2/3 of the time when speaking (imagine there's a triangle with each point

being the 2 pupils and the nose, alternate your gaze between these points), smile often, inject humour when

appropriate. Just a couple things here: you should look at her in the eyes always while you're talking,

there's really no reason not to do that. Where else would you look anyway?
And most important, forget the

triangle. Choose one eye and focus on it. Moving from one eye to another is just as bad as breaking contact, it's

quite unnatural and would make you look nervous. Heck, it will make you nervous too! :)

Yoel

[Have_Courage]

##########

[nichirenx]

everyone else

pretty much said what I was going to.

the body language-approach is the easiest way for me. I just put myself

in a lady's proximity and see how she adjusts.
and I go with it accordingly.
but then my previous MA(martial

arts) training might have helped with the reading and adapting.

never tried any contact except for a end date

handshake or the kiss-the-hand flourish on the first few dates.

and strong confidence mixed with a bit of

humility and a 50/50 humorous/serious attitude works.

but from what you say.
you should be able to easily

initiate contact.

[nichirenx]

The whole dating deal

sucks to tell you the truth.
The more you try not to embarrass yourself on the first dates the worse you behave

by being to careful perhaps spill a glass of water or drop the food from the fork while you're trying to take a

bite of food! things you normally woudn't do if you aren't nervous and just relaxed..
I did and still

do agree with that statement. I used to try to please everyone but myself. Got a real dose of reality a couple of

years ago.

Now I have a devil-may-care attitude(not to the point of being a snot). And for about 65% of the

ladies I meet at work or elswhere its attractive.
Being yourself(unless you are charles manson) works wonders.