MOBLEYC57
10-23-2004, 08:12 PM
:sad: 8 more days before weird stuff starts happening! :twisted: Study long ... study good!
Your survival may depend on it! :drunk:
1) When it appears that you have killed the monster, *never!* check to see if it's really
dead.
2) Never read a book of demon summoning aloud, even as a joke.
3) Do not search the basement, especially
if the power has just gone out.
4) If your children speak to you in Latin or any other language which they should
not know, or if they speak to you using a voice which is other than their own, shoot them immediately. It will save
you a lot of grief in the long run. NOTE: It will probably take several rounds to kill them, so be
prepared.
5) When you have the benefit of numbers, *never!* pair off and go it alone.
6) As a general rule,
you idiot, don't solve puzzles that open portals to Hell.
7) Never stand in, on, above, below, beside, or
anywhere near a grave, tomb, crypt, mausoleum, or other house of the dead.
8) If you're searching for something
which caused a noise and find out that it's just the cat, *leave the room immediately if you value your
life!*
9) If appliances start operating by themselves, get out. Forget the purse, car keys, and the cat!
10)
Do not take *anything* from the dead.
11) If you find a town which looks deserted, it's probably for a reason.
Take the hint and stay away.
12) Don't fool with recombinant DNA technology unless you're sure you know what
you are doing.
13) If you're running from the monster, expect to trip or fall down at least twice, more if you
are of the female persuasion. Also note that, despite the fact that you are running and the monster is merely
shambling along, it's still moving fast enough to catch up with you.
14) If your companions suddenly begin to
exhibit uncharacteristic behavior such as hissing, fascination for blood, glowing eyes, increasing hairiness, and so
on, get away from them as fast as possible.
15) Stay away from certain geographical locations, some of which are
listed here: Amityville, Elm Street, Transylvania, Nilbog (you're in trouble if you recognize this one), the
Bermuda Triangle, or any small town in Maine.
16) If your car runs out of gas at night, do not go to the nearby
deserted-looking house to phone for help.
17) Beware of strangers bearing tools such as chainsaws, staple guns,
hedge trimmers, electric carving knives, combines, lawnmowers, butane torches, soldering irons, band saws, or any
device made from deceased companions.
:smite: YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED ... DAMNIT!
Your survival may depend on it! :drunk:
1) When it appears that you have killed the monster, *never!* check to see if it's really
dead.
2) Never read a book of demon summoning aloud, even as a joke.
3) Do not search the basement, especially
if the power has just gone out.
4) If your children speak to you in Latin or any other language which they should
not know, or if they speak to you using a voice which is other than their own, shoot them immediately. It will save
you a lot of grief in the long run. NOTE: It will probably take several rounds to kill them, so be
prepared.
5) When you have the benefit of numbers, *never!* pair off and go it alone.
6) As a general rule,
you idiot, don't solve puzzles that open portals to Hell.
7) Never stand in, on, above, below, beside, or
anywhere near a grave, tomb, crypt, mausoleum, or other house of the dead.
8) If you're searching for something
which caused a noise and find out that it's just the cat, *leave the room immediately if you value your
life!*
9) If appliances start operating by themselves, get out. Forget the purse, car keys, and the cat!
10)
Do not take *anything* from the dead.
11) If you find a town which looks deserted, it's probably for a reason.
Take the hint and stay away.
12) Don't fool with recombinant DNA technology unless you're sure you know what
you are doing.
13) If you're running from the monster, expect to trip or fall down at least twice, more if you
are of the female persuasion. Also note that, despite the fact that you are running and the monster is merely
shambling along, it's still moving fast enough to catch up with you.
14) If your companions suddenly begin to
exhibit uncharacteristic behavior such as hissing, fascination for blood, glowing eyes, increasing hairiness, and so
on, get away from them as fast as possible.
15) Stay away from certain geographical locations, some of which are
listed here: Amityville, Elm Street, Transylvania, Nilbog (you're in trouble if you recognize this one), the
Bermuda Triangle, or any small town in Maine.
16) If your car runs out of gas at night, do not go to the nearby
deserted-looking house to phone for help.
17) Beware of strangers bearing tools such as chainsaws, staple guns,
hedge trimmers, electric carving knives, combines, lawnmowers, butane torches, soldering irons, band saws, or any
device made from deceased companions.
:smite: YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED ... DAMNIT!