Dirty girl

[Snoopy]

I know this girl that is

really cute, and she is ALWAYS cracking dirty jokes with me and we always have a great laugh about them. If it has

anything to do with masturbation, she snaps on it first, and a lot of the times she beats me to making a sick

comment to something.

Is there anything I can do to heighten and relate all this sexual talk to the both of us?

(You all know where I'm going with this one ;))

The only -mones I own currently is Chikara, but I should be

receiving my unscented SOE next week or so, so I will have that to play around with too.

Side notes: 19 year old

girl. Very horny. Very cute. Likes to be around me, but I can never hook it up with her.

[Snoopy]

Alcohol would do the job. Last

time she had some she was all over me. Literally (and it was fun). The bad part is, she doesn't drink often, and is

a casual drinker - like me. She also has low tolerance. I don't think she ever drinks unless its at a party.

[Snoopy]

What the... I'm pretty sure I

saw a reply from BassMan. Where the heck did it go?

[Bruce]

Bassman deleted it himself. I

don't know why. Maybe he is updating it.

B

[Pancho1188]

Note: You could just

be honest, but hey, where's the fun in that?

As the king of subtlety, I will show you some examples of

how to personalize sexual jokes without risking rejection because, after all, you're "just joking"...

Anything

to do with her talking about masturbation:

"Well, if you ever need any help with that, you know where to find

me."
"Maybe you should just put a sign out saying, 'Open for business.' In fact, where does the line form?

Maybe I'll take a number."
"I don't know why you'd need to do anything like that when I'm sure hundreds of men

out there would want to help you with that."
"I'd offer to help you out with that, but I'd probably wear you out

and you have to get up early tomorrow."

...you get the picture...

Anything about you masturbating:



"Well, until someone offers to help me out, I guess I'll have to do it myself."
"Well, I have to do something.

Are you offering an alternative?"
"Well, my hands aren't as attractive as you are, but until you come to your

senses, they'll have to do."
"Could you help me out with that? The doctor said I shouldn't lift anything

heavy."

...you get the picture...

Anything about sex:

"I've never done it like that [in a pool, shower,

Burger King bathroom, with a blindfold, 'wheelbarrow' style, whatever she thinks of], but maybe we could give it a

shot sometime?"


If she's horny and thinks your cute, the sex jokes will actually get her thinking about

it...if she likes what she sees in her mind, you may be getting some action soon. Otherwise, you get a good laugh

and move on.

There are other things, but for you to ask would be for you to say to Pavorotti, "Teach me to sing

like you." Just kidding.

[Snoopy]

lol Pancho, I KNOW she will love

those lines. Thanks bud. Oh, and I read your Memoirs posting. Very very well written and touching stuff. Keep it

up!

She denies masturbating herself. Do you think she could be lying?

[camusflage]

She denies

masturbating herself. Do you think she could be lying?
There are two types of people. Those who do it and

those who lie about not doing it.

[Pancho1188]

lol Pancho, I

KNOW she will love those lines. Thanks bud. Oh, and I read your Memoirs posting. Very very well written and touching

stuff. Keep it up!

She denies masturbating herself. Do you think she could be lying?Even better.



When she denies it, respond with this:

"Well, you must be very sexually frustrated then. I could take care of

that for you."
"You must have a lot of suppressed sexual energy. I'd love to be the one on the receiving end when

you finally open Pandora's Box."
...later...
"It would be like Gladiator: 'On my signal, unleash hell.'"



...or something of the like.

Man, I could really tear it up in the position you're in. Let me know if you

need more witty one-liners.

[koolking1]

not so my friend. I know

at least one woman who has never masturbated.

[BassMan]

What the... I'm

pretty sure I saw a reply from BassMan. Where the heck did it go?Sorry. Rethought it when I realized she was

19. Not knowing where you were and _your_ age, I didn't want to advocate doing something that could get you

busted.

That all said, alcohol and a little NPA should work wonders. If you can suss her cycle, alcohol and NPA

around the time of her ovulation should do it if it's doable.

I've good luck all of my life with inviting

women over for a home-cooked meal and a bottle of wine or two. Even a casual drinker will share a bottle over

dinner. If you don't cook, learn. At least a couple of dishes. Women adore it.

[Snoopy]

Legal drinking age is 19 where I

live :D

[BassMan]

Legal drinking age

is 19 where I live :DI added another paragraph about food. Do you cook?

[Snoopy]

I can cook a few dishes, like

Spaghetti... lol

Anything with instructions on the box and I'm all over it hahaha

[BassMan]

I can cook a few

dishes, like Spaghetti... lol

Anything with instructions on the box and I'm all over it hahahaYup.

Spaghetti, chianti, l'amore.

Good luck!

[Snoopy]

I don't think she likes wine,

though. I do know that she LOVES very sweet (where you cant even taste the alcohol) drinks.

[Snoopy]

She's afraid to try my cooking.

Last time I offered some of my left overs she refused to try it, even though I did a pretty good job. But then

again, they were left overs... if I cooked especially for her, maybe just on the whim while she was over - it would

be a different story.

But damn! People are always in my house. My parents are never home, but my grandma /

little brother are. Her parents are ALWAYS home. I can never get a good intimate one on one with her...

[Pancho1188]

Hotels and deserted parking

lots/fields/whatever in the car always work well...at least that's what I did...

[Snoopy]

WOW my SOE arrived today. MUCH

earlier than I expected. I am one happy customer :D

Since I've only tried Chikara twice, I think I'll keep

trying it solo for a bit until I get a handle for what it does. Then maybe I'll try SOE solo, then a combo.

[Friendly1]

Alcohol just lowers her

inhibitions and impairs her judgement. If she gets that way with alcohol, she'll get that way without it. I would

prefer the non-drunk lover myself. That's just a personal preference.

The mones can take you there without the

alcohol. You just have to learn how to work your game.

[CptKipling]

"Well, my hands

aren't as attractive as you are, but until you come to your senses, they'll have to do."
"Could you help me out

with that? The doctor said I shouldn't lift anything heavy.":D

Those are pretty good, can I borrow them

;)

[Snoopy]

Alcohol just

lowers her inhibitions and impairs her judgement. If she gets that way with alcohol, she'll get that way without

it. I would prefer the non-drunk lover myself. That's just a personal preference.

The mones can take you there

without the alcohol. You just have to learn how to work your game.
I agree totally. Although, alcohol can

be fun at times too :) (without the intention of using it to impair her judgement)

[CptKipling]

I agree totally.

Although, alcohol can be fun at times too :) (without the intention of using it to impair her judgement)


Completely innocent I'm sure ;)

As you may have read, alcohol helps draw out phero based reactions from

people aswell, due to the reduction of inhibitions.

[Friendly1]

Whatever you do, Snoopy, just

remember not to push it. Let it happen at its own pace.

[Snoopy]

That's not a problem at all,

Friendly1
She's the one that starts everything anyway :)