Feeling discouraged

[Snoopy]

I just had a date

this weekend that went really really well and the girl has been calling me, etc etc. I used Chikara and we had a lot

of fun, and lots of body contact. The thing is, I just got a haircut and it looks terrible! Not only that, my entire

face just broke out in acne and it just seems to be getting worse. I am so discouraged that I don't even feel like

talking to her, even though the weekend was so amazing... I'm scared I might get depressed and moody and completely

turn her off.

This isn't the first time it's happened to me before either. Every time I have a really good

start with a girl, I end up breaking out and my mood flips like crazy. It's always driven me into depression and I

always lose the girl because of it. I'm so afraid it's going to happen again. Will she like me less? This girl is

like a 9.5/10, and all her past boyfriends have been really good looking.

[Unknownshadow21]

I think the best thing

you can do, is STOP seeing her for a few days, this should increase her "ATTRACTION" for you, believe it or not.

Just make sure to keep yourself busy!!!

Also stop worrying about your "LOOKS" just make sure you are well

groomed. Work on your "Sense of humor", Body language and project [Confidence] that should be it.

[TRock]

just pretend you're busy this

weekend, don't even tell her you're busy. and don't call her til after the weekend is over. she's gonna be

wondering why you aren't all over her and that's gonna intrigue her.

[CptKipling]

Not only that, my

entire face just broke out in acne and it just seems to be getting worse.
Make some homemade soup with

carrots, and take some zinc tablets. I have never had acne but those two are supposed to help.

[Friendly1]

Acne often erupts because of

stress. I am 44 and I still occasionally get a zit when I am stressed out. The worst thing you can do is obsess

over it. I agree with the general advice. Give yourself some time. Let the girl wonder. Find some way to stay

busy. Take your mind off of her.

You will definitely run her off if you obsess over her like some needy

dweeb.

[omoyemaya30]

I Agree W /trock And

Unknownshadow21...i Am A Woman..i Believe If You Act Like Your Busy This Weekend ..she Is Going To Wonder Why Your

Busy..that Wl Make Her Wonder..what's Going On..and I'm Sure If You Say She Is A 9.5/10 Scale..she Is Not Going To

Expect Someone Doing This To Her ...and That My Friend Wl Make Her Want You Even More..if She Is The One For

You..then You Wl Really See How She Feels About You....don't Everybody Agree?

[metroman]

and it will also give your hair

a chance to grow in somewhat...or how about a hat of somekind if its still not to your liking...baseball cap

maybe...

[Snoopy]

I went out and bought ProActiv

today, an 3-step acne treatment facial wash system. I hope it works, it was a bit pricey... My skin is all dry now

though. Can anyone recommend a good oil-free facial lotion?

[bjf]

buy a soap in a cvs or drug store

with 10 percent benzoyl peroxide.... that's all you need to make a world of difference.

Alot of acne soaps

use saylic acid or something but its not as effective.

And your drying out your skin because you are putting

on so much treatment. Get Lubriderm if you want oil-free.

[Unknownshadow21]

I went out

and bought ProActiv today, an 3-step acne treatment facial wash system. I hope it works, it was a bit pricey... My

skin is all dry now though. Can anyone recommend a good oil-free facial lotion?
Menscience has the

lightest oil-free facial lotion I have tried and I must admit its the best out there.

[bindy]

I agree with all the advice on

waiting to see her (from a woman's perspective here). I could never stand a man that had nothing to do but me. It

was really attractive when he had other things going on....not to the total exclusion of me, but just had a life

besides me. So, keeping her waiting a bit, until you're feeling better will do you both good.
As far as the

depression. Go out and get some 5 HTP at the grocery store (if it's well stocked with herbs) or the health food

store if your grocery doesn't have it. It will help. I have used it for mild depression ( a woman thing) and for

anxiety, and it works really well.
As far as the breakouts, good to get that skin care program going. You might

also want to check with your doc to see if you might need something else. If someone's tried a product and can

vouch for it, like Manscience, I'd go with that. As far as the drying, yep, I'd cut back a bit, but that is what

you're trying to do, dry out the skin just a bit. I don't know about the benzoyl peroxide, won't that just dry

your skin out more?
For women's products, I use Neutrogena Visibly firm. It has copper in it, which is supposed

to be great for your skin, and it's light, but I don't have acne, so I don't know how it would be for you.
As

far as what she'll think of you. If you're well groomed, brush your teeth well, and are showered, it will be

obvious that you care about your appearance. BTW, men and feet.....guys, no long toe nails, no yellow toe nails,

and maybe consider shaving your feet if you want to go bare foot but don't have a tan. Just a thought! ;

)
Bindy

[Snoopy]

Thanks for the replies guys.

I'll just have to do what I can. I ordered some SOE Unscented which should arrive in a week or two, but for now I

think stand-alone Chikara will definately be enough. The second I am feeling better I will make sure we get together

:) Maybe hit up a theme park or something...

By the way, she's hit me with LJBF before... like twice. There is

always this thought in the back of my mind that she likes some other guy and will just LJBF me again! I know that

there are a lot of guys going for her because she's really outgoing and popular. A lot of the guys are better

looking than I am too. I guess I'm going to have to just go all out, and if I still come home empty handed, give up

and move on...

[Snoopy]

I know that breathing space and

resting time is good, but I always get paranoid that during that time we're "off", she might meet someone else and

spark something. Do you guys have any advice on how to get that paranoia out of my head?

[belgareth]

I know that

breathing space and resting time is good, but I always get paranoid that during that time we're "off", she might

meet someone else and spark something. Do you guys have any advice on how to get that paranoia out of my

head?
Stop putting all your eggs in one basket. Meet, talk to, date other girls. Avoid the trap of bieng

tied to one girl. You'll be a lot more relaxed about the whole thing if you have several other girls you can call

for a date or just to hang out together. Since you are not in a committed relationship, enjoy yourself and spend

time with several women. If this one girl is really attracted to you, she'll make a greater effort to attract you.

If she's playing games, you can walk away from it comfortably.

In short, relax and have fun.

[Friendly1]

By the way,

she's hit me with LJBF before... like twice. There is always this thought in the back of my mind that she likes

some other guy and will just LJBF me again!Dude,

I am telling you and every other guy here, LJBF is not

necessarily the kiss of death guys always make it out to be. Most of the girls who fell for me did so after I agreed

to just be friends. They saw me relax and become interested in other girls. I was fun to be with and wasn't

pressuring them to go out with me. I had more spontaneous dates which led to serious relationships with LJBF than I

had serious dates asking strangers out.

Take the lead and LJBF HER. It will give you the advantage. Just treat

her like a friend.

Don't obsess.

Don't obsess.

Don't obsess.

[bindy]

I agree with Friendly1. From a

women's point of view, there's nothing more unattractive than a desparate guy/girl, but on the other hand,

something very intriguing and attractive about a guy who can be your friend, and those relationships often develop

into something better than if you'd started out lovers. After all, if you really get to know her first it will be

more meaningful.
Bindy

[Snoopy]

We've been best friends for

several years now. I think LJBF has been rubbed in a lot already, so it would be wierd if I just came out and said

that to her no matter what the situation was.

For the don't obsess thing, I agree. I used to be obsessed with

her and the only thing I got back from that was depression. I've gone back to playing sports and doing other fun

things with friends now, and I think that has helped me a lot.

I don't have too many other girl friends, nor do

I have friends who would want to go clubbing with me either (they aren't really into that). When school starts I

will make an opportunity to meet more, but that's not for another month.

I could, however, try to meet some

friends of friends. That is definately something I would and probably will do this month.

[bindy]

You're so young! Go out, have

fun. Keep the relationship in the back of your mind, but in the meantime just have fun and be friends with her.

She's been around for a long time, if you are patient, warm, caring, friendly, and fun, eventually she'll fall for

you, and if not, keep your eyes open. There are tons of girls out there, and probably several just right for you.

It's good that you're busy doing things with other people, and that you have friends who might hook you up.

Sometimes our friends know what might work better than we do.
Good luck!
Bindy

[Snoopy]

Thanks bindy! And thanks to

everyone else too. I'm not feeling discouraged anymore, instead, I'm glad that I'm learning this now, rather than

later in my life.

[Sesshoumaru]

buy a soap in a

cvs or drug store with 10 percent benzoyl peroxide.... that's all you need to make a world of difference.

Alot

of acne soaps use saylic acid or something but its not as effective.

And your drying out your skin because you

are putting on so much treatment. Get Lubriderm if you want oil-free.
10% benzoyl peroxide is too much.

You'll just end up burning your face :rant: .

5% works great for me, it's just the right dose. Take the cream

and put it all over your face, once a day and you won't get burned to death.

Proactive also has 10% benzoyl

peroxide, one of you guys that mentioned it should watch out. Also the 5% creams bring double the amount so you

won't be loosing any money. Plus with more cream you can cover a wider surface area of your skin.

[Snoopy]

The one I got has 2.5% BP. I used

to use a 5% BP and I still found it a bit strong.

[bjf]

Okay, 10 percent is for SOAP, not

creme. Someone else mentioned drying out your face with it, but you won't this isn't a topical creme.

This

stuff gets washed off after 30 seconds, so it has to be high, because most of it isn't being absorbed into the

skin.


Snoopy, just get the crap.

[Snoopy]

Snoopy, just get the

crap.
Get what crap? I said before that I purchased ProActiv already (2.5% BP).

[Friendly1]

Benzoyl Peroxide is still, I

think, the most medically effective treatment for acne after antibiotics. If you are really having serious

breakouts and you just feel too self-conscious about them, try getting a referral to a dermatologist. It will be

expensive but maybe that will help you out. You can't build up your confidence while you're worrying about your

face.

[Sesshoumaru]

Get what crap?

I said before that I purchased ProActiv already (2.5% BP).
I didn't know Proactive came in 2.5% strength,

I guess thats fine then :D

[Friendly1]

I don't have too

many other girl friends, nor do I have friends who would want to go clubbing with me either (they aren't really

into that). When school starts I will make an opportunity to meet more, but that's not for another month.

I

could, however, try to meet some friends of friends. That is definately something I would and probably will do this

month.
If you have $40-60, go sign up for some dance classes. ATTEND THEM ALL. Take Swing Dance, Latin

Dance, even Two Step if that is what people do in your area.

Stick with it.

Start with the intention of

putting 1-2 years into it.

You would have to be a total screwup not to meet some interesting people in the next

2 years through dance classes. Don't rush into anything. After you have been there a few months, you'll be the

top dog (or one of them). The girls will all want to dance with you no matter how bad you were on the first day.



NOW is the time to do it. Most dance teachers do 1 month classes, and the month is just starting. The timing is

perfect.

Don't worry about your acne. Unless you're a good dancer, the first 2 months in dance class you are

nothing special. Let the girls move on. Just get used to dancing with them without letting yourself get excited.



And wear your pheromones on a regular basis.

[camusflage]

If you have

$40-60, go sign up for some dance classes. ATTEND THEM ALL. Take Swing Dance, Latin Dance, even Two Step if that

is what people do in your area.
Motion seconded! Check out clubs in your area. Around me, there are free

or LOW cost classes thurs-sunday for various swing and salsa places around. Get in, start learning the basics, and

get busy. Where else can you have your hands on a woman ten seconds after meeting her? :) I started taking dance

lessons on SwingerMD's suggestion, and have become quite a capable dancer over the past two years.