MOBLEYC57
07-07-2004, 07:35 PM
:rofl:
:welcome: :rofl:
KIDS...YA GOTTA LOV’EM! :angel:
1) A young couple, with their three-year old daughter,
was enjoying their coffee at a local coffee shop when the little girl asked, "What's that smell in your coffee
Momma?" "Its hazelnut coffee, sweetie", the mother said. "There's nuts in your coffee, momma?", said the little
girl, to which the mother replied, "Yes, dear, just like your father's coffee, we both like hazelnut coffee." With
that, the little girl turned to her dad and said, "Daddy, can I smell your nuts?"
2) There is a little boy and
a little girl in the woods. The little girl asked the boy, "What is a penis?" The boy replied, "I don't know." At
that time he hears his mum calling him for lunch. He goes home and eats his lunch. Then he sees his dad on the
couch. He goes up to his dad and ask him, "What is a penis?" The dad whips his out and says to the boy, "This is a
penis, and as a matter of fact this is the perfect penis." The boy leaves to go find his friend and brings her to
the woods. The girl again asks him what a penis is. He whips out his penis and says to her, "This is a penis, and if
it was two inches smaller it would be the perfect penis!"
LITTLE JOHNNY’S EDUMACATION :blink:
Young Johnny,
roughly 10 years of age, is walking downtown and a girl calls to him, "blowjob, twenty dollars." He gives her a
strange look and keeps walking. Soon another girl does the same thing. Confused, he keeps walking. The first thing
out of his mouth when he returned home was....."Mom, what's a blowjob?" His mom replies, "Twenty dollars, just the
same as it is downtown."
AN OLD MAN CAN LEARN SOMETHING NEW! :wub:
An old man and his grandson are enjoying
the sunshine in the back yard. The boy spots a worm sticking its nose out of the ground and he pulls it out. His
grandfather is annoyed at him and says: "You shouldn't have done that. Now that worm is exposed and will die or be
eaten by a bird." The kid is crestfallen and so the grandfather tells him that he'll give him a dollar if he can
figure out a way to get the worm back into the ground. The kid thinks for a minute and runs off to the house. He
returns carrying a can of spray-starch. He holds up the worm and sprays it with the starch, then shoves the worm
back into its hole and collects his dollar. The next morning the boy is playing out in the yard. His grandfather
comes up to him and hands him another *fifty* dollars and says: "That's from your grandmother! She says, 'Thanks a
lot!!'"
VIAGRA…THE WONDER PILL!!! :drunk:
A man fell asleep on the beach. He woke up several hours later and
suffered a severe sunburn to his legs and was taken to the closest hospital, which happened to be a U.S. Naval
Hospital. His skin had turned a bright red and was very painful and had started to blister. Anything that touched
his legs caused agony. The lead on the medical staff at the naval hospital, that night, was a Chief Corpsman, in the
emergency room. The Chief checked him out and then prescribed continued intravenous feedings of water, electrolytes,
a mild sedative, and Viagra. Rather astounded, the 3rd class corpsman, who was with the Chief inquired, "What in the
hell good will Viagra do him in that condition?" The Chief replied, "It'll keep the sheet off his legs."
A TIC
TACS PERHAPS? :rasp:
It's Harold's first day in the car pool. They honk the horn in front of his house and he
comes running out. He gets about halfway down the walk when he hears a grunt and the sound of his wife's foot
tapping on the porch. He turns around and there she is, scowling at him. He runs back to the steps, spreads her
bathrobe, bends over, kisses her on the privates, runs back down the walk and hops in the car. They ride in silence
for a few minutes, until Walter, the driver, has to ask, "Harold, it's none of my business, but why'd you kiss her
down there?" Harold says, "You wouldn’’t f#cking believe her breath in the morning!"
BLONDE?:whip:
There were 2 old-maid sisters...both virgins. It's Friday night and Gladys looks at Betty and says, "I'm not
going to die a virgin... I'm going out and I'm not coming home 'til I've been laid!!" Betty says, "Well, make
sure you're home by 10 so I don't worry about you." 10 o'clock rolls around and there's no sign of Gladys... 11
o'clock...12 o'clock... Finally about 15 after 1 the front door slams open. In runs Gladys...straight to the
bathroom. Betty goes and knocks on the door, "Are you okay, Gladys??" No answer, so she opens the door and there
sits Gladys with her panties around her ankles, legs spread, and her head stuck between her legs looking at herself.
"What is it, Gladys??? What's wrong?" asks Betty. "Betty darling, it was 10 hard inches long when it went inside
me!!, and it was 5 when it came out. When I find the other half you're gonna have the time of your life!!!"
Ci
sentiamo al piu presto! Ciao! :thumbsup:
:welcome: :rofl:
KIDS...YA GOTTA LOV’EM! :angel:
1) A young couple, with their three-year old daughter,
was enjoying their coffee at a local coffee shop when the little girl asked, "What's that smell in your coffee
Momma?" "Its hazelnut coffee, sweetie", the mother said. "There's nuts in your coffee, momma?", said the little
girl, to which the mother replied, "Yes, dear, just like your father's coffee, we both like hazelnut coffee." With
that, the little girl turned to her dad and said, "Daddy, can I smell your nuts?"
2) There is a little boy and
a little girl in the woods. The little girl asked the boy, "What is a penis?" The boy replied, "I don't know." At
that time he hears his mum calling him for lunch. He goes home and eats his lunch. Then he sees his dad on the
couch. He goes up to his dad and ask him, "What is a penis?" The dad whips his out and says to the boy, "This is a
penis, and as a matter of fact this is the perfect penis." The boy leaves to go find his friend and brings her to
the woods. The girl again asks him what a penis is. He whips out his penis and says to her, "This is a penis, and if
it was two inches smaller it would be the perfect penis!"
LITTLE JOHNNY’S EDUMACATION :blink:
Young Johnny,
roughly 10 years of age, is walking downtown and a girl calls to him, "blowjob, twenty dollars." He gives her a
strange look and keeps walking. Soon another girl does the same thing. Confused, he keeps walking. The first thing
out of his mouth when he returned home was....."Mom, what's a blowjob?" His mom replies, "Twenty dollars, just the
same as it is downtown."
AN OLD MAN CAN LEARN SOMETHING NEW! :wub:
An old man and his grandson are enjoying
the sunshine in the back yard. The boy spots a worm sticking its nose out of the ground and he pulls it out. His
grandfather is annoyed at him and says: "You shouldn't have done that. Now that worm is exposed and will die or be
eaten by a bird." The kid is crestfallen and so the grandfather tells him that he'll give him a dollar if he can
figure out a way to get the worm back into the ground. The kid thinks for a minute and runs off to the house. He
returns carrying a can of spray-starch. He holds up the worm and sprays it with the starch, then shoves the worm
back into its hole and collects his dollar. The next morning the boy is playing out in the yard. His grandfather
comes up to him and hands him another *fifty* dollars and says: "That's from your grandmother! She says, 'Thanks a
lot!!'"
VIAGRA…THE WONDER PILL!!! :drunk:
A man fell asleep on the beach. He woke up several hours later and
suffered a severe sunburn to his legs and was taken to the closest hospital, which happened to be a U.S. Naval
Hospital. His skin had turned a bright red and was very painful and had started to blister. Anything that touched
his legs caused agony. The lead on the medical staff at the naval hospital, that night, was a Chief Corpsman, in the
emergency room. The Chief checked him out and then prescribed continued intravenous feedings of water, electrolytes,
a mild sedative, and Viagra. Rather astounded, the 3rd class corpsman, who was with the Chief inquired, "What in the
hell good will Viagra do him in that condition?" The Chief replied, "It'll keep the sheet off his legs."
A TIC
TACS PERHAPS? :rasp:
It's Harold's first day in the car pool. They honk the horn in front of his house and he
comes running out. He gets about halfway down the walk when he hears a grunt and the sound of his wife's foot
tapping on the porch. He turns around and there she is, scowling at him. He runs back to the steps, spreads her
bathrobe, bends over, kisses her on the privates, runs back down the walk and hops in the car. They ride in silence
for a few minutes, until Walter, the driver, has to ask, "Harold, it's none of my business, but why'd you kiss her
down there?" Harold says, "You wouldn’’t f#cking believe her breath in the morning!"
BLONDE?:whip:
There were 2 old-maid sisters...both virgins. It's Friday night and Gladys looks at Betty and says, "I'm not
going to die a virgin... I'm going out and I'm not coming home 'til I've been laid!!" Betty says, "Well, make
sure you're home by 10 so I don't worry about you." 10 o'clock rolls around and there's no sign of Gladys... 11
o'clock...12 o'clock... Finally about 15 after 1 the front door slams open. In runs Gladys...straight to the
bathroom. Betty goes and knocks on the door, "Are you okay, Gladys??" No answer, so she opens the door and there
sits Gladys with her panties around her ankles, legs spread, and her head stuck between her legs looking at herself.
"What is it, Gladys??? What's wrong?" asks Betty. "Betty darling, it was 10 hard inches long when it went inside
me!!, and it was 5 when it came out. When I find the other half you're gonna have the time of your life!!!"
Ci
sentiamo al piu presto! Ciao! :thumbsup: