View Full Version : Tips on Introducing yourself to a GIRL
kossBass
06-21-2004, 07:12 PM
hey guys .. yup it's me again kB .. yah just wondering how to pick up a stranger ... it's funny because my
friends(girls) they tell me that guys (the ugly ones) go pick dem up and they would backtalk about it and laugh
about it .. they'd even talk about hot fit guys and laugh too ... i'm just hoping i won't be one of them to
others :( ... so whats the best way to pick up a girl or start a conversation ??
Scene 1: A girl is just siting
there bored to death. What do you do!
dping28
06-21-2004, 07:16 PM
Look em dead in the eye and say:
"Hi, would you like to go out sometime? I think you should I am almost perfect." :D
Friendly1
06-21-2004, 07:49 PM
Sometimes it's as easy as
looking her in the eye and saying, "Let's get out of here". Depends on what she wants and whether you are what she
wants.
dping28
06-21-2004, 07:53 PM
Seriously tho, Check out David
DeAngelo's material. It helps with building up confidence and approaching women. helps you create the proper mind
set so you dont come off as needy and desperate.
skaepSbaS
06-21-2004, 08:20 PM
I'm more of a fan of Ross
Jeffries than David DeAngelo. They are the two most well-known names in the "industry." DeAngelo doesn't get too
involved with NLP and Speed Seduction, although he makes references to it; he's more conservative in his
approaches.
Then again, who am I to judge the masters ;)
skaepSbaS
06-21-2004, 08:22 PM
Oh, and, a little bird told me
that you can pick up DeAngelo's entire seminar series on SuprNova.org (BitTorrent). In case you, uh, broke your
DVD :)
kossBass
06-21-2004, 08:38 PM
thanks a lot bro
btw man i
know you have to d/l something inorder to get the d/l's to work i forgot what it was called :( do you have the site
? for the download manger (or your bird hehe)
tounge
06-21-2004, 09:14 PM
Then
again, who am I to judge the masters ;)
Exactly. The best thing you can do is listen to advice
dispensed by myself and some of the other old cahoots around here. Listen and go out and apply it.
Now I not
that old, but let's just say that if I was a chick I might be starting a slight maturity sag:D
I envy you
young guys, I really do. If the internet was around when I was a teeniebooper I would have been so much better
prepared to deal with girls.
I spent my late teen years and early twenties obsessed with persuing my auto
racing career. I didn't pay socializing with chicks much heed. They were always around but it was mainly a one
night stand and poof.
Once the career was declining and injuries took there toll, I had to deal with the girl
skill problem square in the face. I did most of my work by trial and error. I stopped putting women on a pedestal
and quit assigning higher value than me.
I used my strong points, personality and terrific sense of humor to
my benefit. I treat women very well, but never let them walk all over me.
I don't consider any women out
of my league. I don't think of myself as really good looking(though many say I'm tall, dark and handsome:)). I try
too take looks out of the equation as much as possible.
Learn to do things that give you confidence in
yourself. Go to places where women are(dance, cooking, self defense classes) talk to women. Stay awy from oneitis.
It is a killer. And don't be afraid to say NEXT! Bad relationships are worse than listening to Bobby Vinton sing
"I'm Mr. Lonely" while playing pocket pool. Talk to all women short, tall, fat, thin, hot, fugly.
And when
all else fails, look around you at all the freaking people that are married. Good heavens if so many of those people
can do it then so can you.
happyman
06-22-2004, 01:33 AM
Tips
1. If you know she is
going to be around for a while wait 5 minutes or so to approach her. (otherwise you come off as pushy, desperate,
wierd, or over-bearing)
2. If she isn't going to be around for a while (like if she is passing you or getting
ready to leave an establishment) don't even think about it and do it. Remember hesitation can cause fear. Just act
on it. It will go much smoother than if you ponder it then try and recoup.
3. Look her in the eye's and think in
your head your just being friendly and you are not going to try and lay her right then and there. Think=Just being
cool and friendly here....nothing more. This takes the pressure off.
4. Don't let her see you hitting or
approaching anyone eles or you may seem like an over bearing desperate person.
5. Ask if you can talk with her
again some time for whatever reason or another. Then the ball is in her court. If she acts funny about it just keep
talking and act as if it didn't faze you and then in a bit see if you can have her number very unpushy like(you
gotta try it).
6. If she says no don't act like it fazed you or you are disappointed keep talking for just a bit
more and then tell her that you would really like to have a conversation with her again and give her your card.
Don't say anything like hope you call me or maybe I'll talk to you soon just let it go and tell her bye.
7.
Remember to act as if she is not so much a potential lover or sex partner while your talking to her just act as if
you're just being cool and funny and don't give hewr any compliments yet.
That's
all you gotta do.
Happyman
DZorro
06-22-2004, 01:43 AM
Look em dead in the
eye and say: "Hi, would you like to go out sometime? I think you should I am almost perfect."
:D
And then you hear a big slap too the face :P
DZorro,
DZorro
06-22-2004, 01:46 AM
thanks a lot
bro
btw man i know you have to d/l something inorder to get the d/l's to work i forgot what it was called
:( do you have the site ? for the download manger (or your bird hehe)
Had to
www.bittorent.com
Or you could try this http://www.torrentstorm.com/
Torrentstorm is
the on i use alot. And it's great too.
But both should work regardless of the other hopes this
helps.
DZorro,
DZorro
06-22-2004, 01:48 AM
Tips
1. If you
know she is going to be around for a while wait 5 minutes or so to approach her. (otherwise you come off as pushy,
desperate, wierd, or over-bearing)
2. If she isn't going to be around for a while (like if she is passing you or
getting ready to leave an establishment) don't even think about it and do it. Remember hesitation can cause fear.
Just act on it. It will go much smoother than if you ponder it then try and recoup.
3. Look her in the eye's and
think in your head your just being friendly and you are not going to try and lay her right then and there.
Think=Just being cool and friendly here....nothing more. This takes the pressure off.
4. Don't let her see you
hitting or approaching anyone eles or you may seem like an over bearing desperate person.
5. Ask if you can talk
with her again some time for whatever reason or another. Then the ball is in her court. If she acts funny about it
just keep talking and act as if it didn't faze you and then in a bit see if you can have her number very unpushy
like(you gotta try it).
6. If she says no don't act like it fazed you or you are disappointed keep talking for
just a bit more and then tell her that you would really like to have a conversation with her again and give her your
card. Don't say anything like hope you call me or maybe I'll talk to you soon just let it go and tell her
bye.
7. Remember to act as if she is not so much a potential lover or sex partner while your talking to her just
act as if you're just being cool and funny and don't give hewr any compliments yet.
That's all you gotta do.
Happyman
Great tips. here ya go some good rep points ;)
DZorro,
happyman
06-22-2004, 02:06 AM
Great tips. here
ya go some good rep points ;)
DZorro,Thanks!
Ian
jo23er
06-22-2004, 04:02 AM
hey guys .. yup
it's me again kB .. yah just wondering how to pick up a stranger ... it's funny because my friends(girls) they
tell me that guys (the ugly ones) go pick dem up and they would backtalk about it and laugh about it .. they'd even
talk about hot fit guys and laugh too ... i'm just hoping i won't be one of them to others :( ... so whats the
best way to pick up a girl or start a conversation ??
Scene 1: A girl is just siting there bored to death.
What do you do!
And even if they do laugh with you, what's the big deal? You are not going to go any
far away with this if you dont try your luck several times. If you notice that they dont want to chat or are
avoiding you, just go to the next one in line.
Young girls tend to be VERY selective in choosing who to talk
to,sleep with etc. , maybe because they dont even know what they are looking for in a guy.
kossBass
06-22-2004, 06:43 AM
thanks a lot guys for your help
:p .. rep points for everyone very helpful thanks again.. (and thank you happyboi for the tips :p)
beachboy
06-22-2004, 07:43 AM
Hmm there is no search function
on suprnova.org. I can't find the link to DeAngelo's stuff.
beachboy
06-22-2004, 07:54 AM
Never mind, i already found it
:)
I thought it were e-books or something, but it are movies.
surfs_up
06-22-2004, 10:33 AM
You will learn many useful
things if you take an acting class. Social skills are skills. They are a craft. You need to learn them from someone
who has good skills, then you need to practice them. It doesn't happen by magic.
When I took a beginning
acting class I was blown away by the things beautiful young things would do and say in a class setting. You learn to
be comfortable playing every taboo topic and scene you can wrap your mind around. You can try out variations on you
approach. Then you learn how much of social life is acting anyway.
Know how to get to Carnegie Hall ?
Practice.
skaepSbaS
06-22-2004, 10:40 AM
thanks a lot
bro
btw man i know you have to d/l something inorder to get the d/l's to work i forgot what it was called
:( do you have the site ? for the download manger (or your bird hehe)
It's called BitTorrent.
Google is your friend.
fran1
06-22-2004, 11:10 PM
beach boy in which part of the
movies is the Dangelo stuff?
Action, adventure?
Which one?
fran1
06-22-2004, 11:13 PM
And do you know how to open this
stuff. I already found it, but how I open it?
Regards
happyman
06-22-2004, 11:45 PM
You will learn
many useful things if you take an acting class. Social skills are skills. They are a craft. You need to learn them
from someone who has good skills, then you need to practice them. It doesn't happen by magic.
When I took a
beginning acting class I was blown away by the things beautiful young things would do and say in a class setting.
You learn to be comfortable playing every taboo topic and scene you can wrap your mind around. You can try out
variations on you approach. Then you learn how much of social life is acting anyway.
Know how to get to
Carnegie Hall ? Practice.
Tell us more. It seems that when I hear other people hitting on girls it is
if they are on stage and it seems kinda corny but it really seems to work for my buddy. It seems as if he is kinda
acting it out but the chics bite hard on that rap. I always thought....Geez how can they go for that? But then as I
get older I realize that that is kinda how you gotta be in modern day courtship.
Are there any videos that teach
you this? and what do you mean by the surprising things girls would say and do in the acting enviorment?
Like
can I have some examples?
Thanks,
Happy
Watcher
06-23-2004, 01:25 AM
Never put em on a pedalstool -
give them respect but do not worship them - their heads get to big or you come across as desperate - if you are
failing to attract any women without phermones look at youreself and see where you are going wrong (are youre sights
set to high - ie are you to picky - are you overweight - big turnoff. - you may need to do some gym work. Might
take 6 months but work on it. - are you a bum - being unemployed and unmotivated is not a good thing - get off the
PC and go do some work unless you are a online sharetrader like i do for a fair whack of my earnings in that case
its ok.
Work on conversation and pick up skills - do you bother to talk to women - do you smile ? all these
helps im sure its all covered here and all over the board but its basic hints and tips to follow.
DrSmellThis
06-23-2004, 02:34 AM
Focus on the woman. Observe.
Avoid being too aware of yourself.
What's she doing? Looking to do? Where's she coming from? What's her body
language? How does she react to your being in the room?
Don't be self conscious, just objective.
What's the evidence? What's your intuition?
Are you even attracted? Why? Can you guess anything about
her personality?
Value the deeper observations (e.g., unconscious body language vs. overt actions and speech)
more than surface ones, when they conflict.
If overall conclusion is a go, then just say "Hi," or make an
observation about something she's doing. Don't let yourself lust if you can avoid it. Just be "plain ol' you."
(If she seems interested, you can sometimes just say "hi" and then shut up with a slight friendly smile, putting the
pressure on her. She will think of something to say rather than accept silence.)
Again observe. If neutral or
positive reaction, say something about the situation; reflect the situation. (e.g., "Looks like you're writing a
novel".)
Ask a question or two, one of which is open ended. Go with the flow.
Be very present, and try to
relax. Hear every word she says and think about it. Observe her expressions, body language, etc.
Think of the
most appropriate and least threatening way to continue the conversation, if it's going well. Be friendly and offer
her the continuation, unless you dont want to and/or will see her again soon.
If she doesn't open up right
away, just go about your business, don't apologize, say "bye" or act self-conscious. Nothing about you is relevant
anyway, as you already had and have your part covered. Often they will open up something if you just stay cool, are
satisfied doing your thing, and appear satisfied with the interaction so far. (thus helping her think it went
well) Don't fidget, just be "at peace".
surfs_up
06-24-2004, 06:47 AM
You want to study Improvisation
(often called Improv). This is a class exercise where the group suggests a dramatic moment of some form, say, you
are both walking your dog and happen to have identical breeds and bump into each other and then you have to invent
the conversation for a minute of two. Improv isn't scripted. There is no memorizing lines. You take the situation
as it is given to you and invent the dramatic interaction. You'll learn a huge amount about how to socially
improvise on your feet. If the teacher is good, he or she will give you feedback on what you need to work on, where
to focus you attention, how to get unstuck from a dead spot in the scene, how to change rythms, what an emotional
beat is. It's super basic nuts and bolts work on how to be social in an effective way. Imagine that you have to do
a scene where you try to pick up a beautiful girl in front of a class of twenty people. Think you're self conscious
now ? Then those twenty people tell you in detail what your strengths and weaknesses are. You can't get better
instruction than that. Actors are paid on the basis of how well they can communicate emotion. They work hard to
master it. If you're exceptionally good you make 20 million dollars to do it in front of a camera. The actors that
are paid millions have gone to their share of classes. How many of your friends would you pay money to watch them
try and hook up with a girl, that it would be that compelling a performance ?
a.k.a.
06-24-2004, 06:53 AM
What the Dr. said.
BDC_Concepts
06-24-2004, 03:52 PM
Much of the above is easier
said than done. Dr. brings up some good points about body language and mid conversation reaction. There is much to
be said about approaching someone and being just as concerned with THEIR responses are as they are yours. That
being said, lets talk about breaking the ice. Many people here reading this seeking advice have probably said or
thought at one time that if they could only get a conversation started, this person would enjoy their company and
they would be more successful. Think of a house party setting where most people usually have something in common
(i.e. they know someone) which is a good basis for a conversation. How do you know Jim or Sarah? The idea is that
you are taking a step foward, skipping a step almost, and reaching a psuedo comfort area by association. Now, there
are a million variables and the above may not apply. In a bar, club, or other setting where you are attempting to
interact with complete strangers, the "Hi how are you" speach is normal, effective for some, but clearly typical. I
have given advice to at least 10 people who did not know where to go from there. They will say HI! to someone and
have nothing else to say after that. Play this out:
Hi, how are you
Doing alright...
Good to
hear..
Whats your name?
Jennifer
Whats yours?
Rick..
Ummm how are you??
Yeah, you already
asked that :D. Essentially you are setting yourself up for a normal friendly interaction and inherently, those
reading this seeking advice, already have a hard time with this part, and hell, even getting THIS far. Now for a
moment, let us not forget about our pheromone supplementation. There is something to be said about prolonging an
interaction to the point where a target can take quite a few whiffs and maximize that potential. We want to develop
a situation where we can avoid the typical, Hello how are you, situation and develop some sort of conversation with
content. If you have that ability to kick something off with the traditional method and be successful, more power
to you, but for those who are lacking skills, get nervous, etc, but at the same time recognize that they truly have
intelligence or otherwise something they feel would be interesting to a target, we are looking for a way to
demonstrate that. Think about flipping the script a bit. If you are at a bar and you notice the bartender did
something out of the ordinary to a woman you are targeting, comment on it to her and try to develop from there. An
excellent technique is to get a woman's opinion, ESPECIALLY in a bar or club setting. Women love to comment on
their feelings, opinions, etc. and will do so more when under the influence. Think of ANY situation that is open
ended and approach someone you are interested in asking their opinion. For example, if you are with a friend,
approach a woman and say, excuse me, I need a woman's opinion here.... my friend here is debating with me on what
a good surprise might be for his girlfriend just to show some affection and was considering doing a dozen roses.
Now, I thought that maybe women might feel that is over done a bit, but at the same time, I recognize there is
probably a large amount who would just love that! What do you think? Are flowers overdone? What is a good idea?
What would you like to see if you were in a relationship as a sign of affection? There are million different things
you can do to get a woman's opinion and I have never had a women NOT give it. This is something a shy person can
script to break the ice and get going with things and it will usually get a response out of a women enough to break
way through the approachability factor. Your friend will inherently know what you are doing but you can even have
them help you out without looking like a couple guys who are out to get a piece. From there, options are open.
Many many techniques are available for exploration. I tend to focus, when approaching women, on those things that
will get THEM speaking and allow ME the chance to respond and challenge them accordingly, rather than working into a
situation where you have to play into the normal questions and then run a blank saying....well, it was good chatting
with you!??? I could go on for hours :D.
Matt
BDC Concepts
Holmes
06-24-2004, 04:30 PM
You want to study
Improvisation (often called Improv). This is a class exercise where the group suggests a dramatic moment of some
form, say, you are both walking your dog and happen to have identical breeds and bump into each other and then you
have to invent the conversation for a minute of two. Improv isn't scripted. There is no memorizing lines. You take
the situation as it is given to you and invent the dramatic interaction. You'll learn a huge amount about how to
socially improvise on your feet. If the teacher is good, he or she will give you feedback on what you need to work
on, where to focus you attention, how to get unstuck from a dead spot in the scene, how to change rythms, what an
emotional beat is. It's super basic nuts and bolts work on how to be social in an effective way. Imagine that you
have to do a scene where you try to pick up a beautiful girl in front of a class of twenty people. Think you're
self conscious now ? Then those twenty people tell you in detail what your strengths and weaknesses are. You can't
get better instruction than that. Actors are paid on the basis of how well they can communicate emotion. They work
hard to master it. If you're exceptionally good you make 20 million dollars to do it in front of a camera. The
actors that are paid millions have gone to their share of classes. How many of your friends would you pay money to
watch them try and hook up with a girl, that it would be that compelling a performance ?
Excellent
advice.
I would add as an aside, though, that big-name actors are (more and more) often paid millions according
to how well they elicit an emotional response in the paying public first and foremost and how convincingly
they reproduce emotional states themselves second. More than a few highly-paid actors have inexplicably
not mastered the latter and are instead sliding by on raw "charisma" (read: sex appeal). Orlando Bloom,
anyone?
So, sometimes making 20 million dollars has little to do with being "that good." But, again, point
taken. :D
DrSmellThis
06-24-2004, 05:26 PM
Good point, Holmes, and good
post, Bobby. Surf's up's stuff is good too, if you want to take a class.
There should be coed classes on bar
and coffee shop conversation and behavior skills, as much as the continuation of our species (monkeus indenialus)
depends on it!
Elana
06-24-2004, 06:06 PM
If you are lucky enough to get a
conversation going with her/him, LISTEN to them and take mental notes. Remember the things that they are saying
because if you do end up getting a date with them it will make you look like you are really interested if you can
bring up some of the things that he/she mentioned during your first conversation. That's very important.
Sexyredhead
06-24-2004, 06:58 PM
And if it's hard for you to
remember things about people, like names (I'm very guilty of this :o ) repeat things back to them during the
conversation without sounding like a robot. It will help YOU remember better if you say
them.
Examples:
"Nice to meet you, Rob."
"Wow! Harvard. Really?"
"I've never been to
Pennsylvania. What's it like?"
"And that was after they sewed your thumb back on? Crazy!"
It
keeps the conversation going, and helps little brains like mine remember different people, especially if I meet a
lot of people at once. :)
DrSmellThis
06-24-2004, 07:09 PM
:)
.......
CptKipling
06-25-2004, 04:17 PM
Great post Matt :thumbsup:
It's very important to keep the conversation stimulating. Three of the most obvious ways of doing
this are: Finding some common ground to talk about (not best used in clubs. If used, it's not the most direct
sexually aggressive method, so projecting interest in other ways is important); humour (great for any situation,
full stop. You really can go anywhere very easily with humour, all you need is practice...and a sense of humour ;)
); the skip-the-small-talk "let's talk about sex" method ('nuff said? Remember the kino!).
Synonymous with the above, keeping her interest is also important. A nice way to do this is
something I like to call the "hot and cold" method, which may sound very much like the lame pick up guy type talk,
but it describes something quite simple involving showing restraint and staying cool. Basically, start off the
conversation however you like (as if you were picking her up), and then walk off or start talking to someone else
just before you settle in. The timing isn't that important, just as long as she is still actually talking with you
when you break the conversation. Don't announce your departure too thoroughly (i.e don't excuse yourself), just
find a suitable point and go (note: you don't want to appear a player, so just talk to your mates, but make sure
you left to do something). Hopefully, this will have left her thinking you are a fun guy
that she would have at least talked to for a while longer. If this is obviously not the case, take this opportunity
to escape. The next step is to get talking to her again. Again, timing is not important, in fact overly planning or
forcing any pick up will end in failure 90% of the time. When you talk to her this time, you need to project your
interest in talking to her. Turn your body to face her's gradually (and other interest projecting body language),
make her think that you are really interested in what she has to say, perhaps even initiate some mild kino by softly
touching her arm by the elbow, etc. Your aim is to make her feel good about talking to you and being around you, and
putting your focus on her will help achieve this. You should also remain cool, confident and funny (or
entertaining). Once again, when she is nicely warmed up to you, remove your attention. When you talk to her for the
third time, let her do most of the work. If you had her warmed up when you stopped talking to her, she will be keen
to pick up where you left off.
By doing the above you should
have achieved the following: come across as a confident, fun guy who isn't despirate. You could go out and try it
exactly as I wrote it, but think of that as an experiment, it's best to think of any "technique" as something to
augment you current approach, keeping everything flexable. You could also just do it all in one conversation, simply
by making sure to keep the conversation moving onto the "next level" (how many steps you make it to and how fast
depends on what your aims are), or at least keeping it entertaining.
A classic example of
this I posted on here ages ago. I was with a friend at a party at a bar/small club and his gf was meeting him. When
she came she brought a friend, and I took the piss out of her about her choice of drink and chatted for a minute,
and then turned to my friend. We then went to sit down with some other people and got chatting to her again. After a
while I broke off again to chat to some other people (I think to the Birthday girl), and then came and sat with my
friend again, and she started talking to me. iirc we ended up having a really good convo, but that was it (I had a
gf at the time).
kossBass
06-25-2004, 06:49 PM
:goodpost: wow nice post there
bro.. you got my rep
happyman
06-26-2004, 12:27 AM
You want to
study Improvisation (often called Improv). This is a class exercise where the group suggests a dramatic moment of
some form, say, you are both walking your dog and happen to have identical breeds and bump into each other and then
you have to invent the conversation for a minute of two. Improv isn't scripted. There is no memorizing lines. You
take the situation as it is given to you and invent the dramatic interaction. You'll learn a huge amount about how
to socially improvise on your feet. If the teacher is good, he or she will give you feedback on what you need to
work on, where to focus you attention, how to get unstuck from a dead spot in the scene, how to change rythms, what
an emotional beat is. It's super basic nuts and bolts work on how to be social in an effective way. Imagine that
you have to do a scene where you try to pick up a beautiful girl in front of a class of twenty people. Think you're
self conscious now ? Then those twenty people tell you in detail what your strengths and weaknesses are. You can't
get better instruction than that. Actors are paid on the basis of how well they can communicate emotion. They work
hard to master it. If you're exceptionally good you make 20 million dollars to do it in front of a camera. The
actors that are paid millions have gone to their share of classes. How many of your friends would you pay money to
watch them try and hook up with a girl, that it would be that compelling a performance ?
I see, I
see. It seems so beneficial. Why? Because you are getting constant practice that doesn't totaly count. Also you get
the dibs on what your doing wrong or how you can improve your game. Instead of walking away saying to yourself
"Wonder if it was something I said? She totaly shifted gears on me then it went no-where", You get pointers on what
took place in your interaction that probably changed her vibe towards you.
This could not only work for man-women
social skills but for all of your social interactions. I am going to look into it.
Thanks so much and if you
want to add more to this I would surely read it.
Happy
happyman
06-26-2004, 12:39 AM
Great post
Matt :thumbsup:
It's very important to keep the conversation stimulating. Three of the most
obvious ways of doing this are: Finding some common ground to talk about (not best used in clubs. If used, it's not
the most direct sexually aggressive method, so projecting interest in other ways is important); humour (great for
any situation, full stop. You really can go anywhere very easily with humour, all you need is practice...and a sense
of humour ;) ); the skip-the-small-talk "let's talk about sex" method ('nuff said? Remember the
kino!).
Synonymous with the above, keeping her interest is also important. A nice
way to do this is something I like to call the "hot and cold" method, which may sound very much like the lame pick
up guy type talk, but it describes something quite simple involving showing restraint and staying cool. Basically,
start off the conversation however you like (as if you were picking her up), and then walk off or start talking to
someone else just before you settle in. The timing isn't that important, just as long as she is still actually
talking with you when you break the conversation. Don't announce your departure too thoroughly (i.e don't excuse
yourself), just find a suitable point and go (note: you don't want to appear a player, so just talk to your mates,
but make sure you left to do something). Hopefully, this will have left her thinking you
are a fun guy that she would have at least talked to for a while longer. If this is obviously not the case, take
this opportunity to escape. The next step is to get talking to her again. Again, timing is not important, in fact
overly planning or forcing any pick up will end in failure 90% of the time. When you talk to her this time, you need
to project your interest in talking to her. Turn your body to face her's gradually (and other interest projecting
body language), make her think that you are really interested in what she has to say, perhaps even initiate some
mild kino by softly touching her arm by the elbow, etc. Your aim is to make her feel good about talking to you and
being around you, and putting your focus on her will help achieve this. You should also remain cool, confident and
funny (or entertaining). Once again, when she is nicely warmed up to you, remove your attention. When you talk to
her for the third time, let her do most of the work. If you had her warmed up when you stopped talking to her, she
will be keen to pick up where you left off.
By doing the above you
should have achieved the following: come across as a confident, fun guy who isn't
despirate. You could go out and try it exactly as I wrote it, but think of that as an experiment, it's best to
think of any "technique" as something to augment you current approach, keeping everything flexable. You could also
just do it all in one conversation, simply by making sure to keep the conversation moving onto the "next level" (how
many steps you make it to and how fast depends on what your aims are), or at least keeping it
entertaining.
A classic example of this I posted on here ages ago. I was with a
friend at a party at a bar/small club and his gf was meeting him. When she came she brought a friend, and I took the
piss out of her about her choice of drink and chatted for a minute, and then turned to my friend. We then went to
sit down with some other people and got chatting to her again. After a while I broke off again to chat to some other
people (I think to the Birthday girl), and then came and sat with my friend again, and she started talking to me.
iirc we ended up having a really good convo, but that was it (I had a gf at the time).
Wow.
Very useful post.
Good part for me:
You're very right. You know I have done the Hot and Cold thing many times
and that really gets them interested. You are playing their game on them.
Bad Part for me:
I did it
unconsciously. lol I didn't try to do it that way it just happend. I never even knew what took place that got her
interested. Now, Thanks to your post I do. I am going to consciously try it the next time I get the chance.
You're right. The real way to get a women wanting more and more is to get her warmed up and then slip away without
being rude. They stay warm that way. You never give them the chance to change gears on you because you have did it
to them first. Instead of controlling the game they are now in a wanting position and are intriged. Great
observation you have made.
Any more tips?
Happy
CptKipling
06-26-2004, 10:33 AM
As I posted in my last post,
another crucial aspect to your conversation is to keep it moving in the direction you want to take it. If you want
to get her in bed, advance the conversation in steps towards that goal. I find that to be a good way to visualise
it, but basically just don't get stuck talking about the weather or whater, keep moving onto stimulating topics and
see where it takes you.
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